#fluff asks

me too. if it's any consolation though he was an active participant in posh bathroom sex at the work christmas party with you last week lmfao (the bathroom being posh and not the sex lol. the sex was filthy in the best way if we're being honest), and he's really looking forward to spending christmas with the in-laws and the feral pack of nieces that are almost as obsessed with you (and maggie!) as he is. adorable little slut i love him so much <3

again, a last minute half-arsed one, danny and sandy from grease (leather jacket cig smoking sandy, naturally)!! the two of you were kinda high and brainstorming easy costume ideas that you could do with clothes you already owned, and you're not sure who suggested using the 848203 leather jackets in matty's wardrobe and doing grease, but it stuck; mind you, this is right before you get together, so the sexual tension is kinda at its peak, so when you burst into matty's room half-dressed and say "the leather leggings i bought are SO tight matty you need to help me get into them" and get him to help you drag the fabric up your legs... yeah, he's on the struggle bus fr. he refuses to gel his hair properly like john travolta cos he thinks it looks stupid, but he does get you to fix it for him, and you deliberately take a bit longer than necessary just to enjoy the feeling of straddling him and brushing up against him and having his hands on your hips to keep you steady... literally just kiss already u fucking idiots <3

politician... in the uni days, there's definitely a pulp fiction couples costume, and pre-dating there was an accidentally-coordinated pirate (him) and mermaid (you) moment at a party that actually kinda worked out in the end given that matty went home with you that night lol. now, while he's in office, i think you go as men in black, a family-friendly costume to appeal to the masses lol - you borrow one of his suits and get a fake inflatable alien, all that fun stuff, and really play into the area 51 jokes lmfao. cute!! <3

love him!! ok so for once he's actually not working on halloween, but he doesn't get confirmation of this until a few days before so the two of you kinda scramble to put something together for your friend's house party, and honestly i think he chucks on a black and yellow t shirt and you chuck on a pair of dog ears and you go as charlie brown and snoopy 😭😭 it's sooooooooo silly, but you have a proper laugh about it, and george thinks you're the cutest thing ever lol <3

this is really fun!! i think that holiday traditions and general superstitions are two of the things all vampires (at least the ones you know) seem to really uphold even in their undead lives, and given that your friends are a real mix of ages and cultures it's a lot of fun celebrating with them; a lot of the traditions are the same across cultures, actually, to do with leaving little offerings for and remembering late friends and relatives, and doing little rituals to ward off evil (matty finds this really ironic, given that vampires are presumed to be soulless), and lighting candles and bonfires, so actually the party kinda ends up wistful at some parts. but it's nice, you know, everyone talking about life and really celebrating it, and there are fun things too - the costumes, of course, which like you said can get really niche, and drinking, and games (you almost get into a fight with ross when he beats you at apple bobbing, which you claim is unfair because "you've got fucking FANGS and you don't need to breathe, you bastard" lmfao), and sitting outside lighting cigs from the bonfire just having a good old laugh daring the vampires to eat the worst human food combinations you can come up with. they're a fun bunch, those vampires, and you love hearing their recollections of historical events; some of them are just as fascinated learning about your own upbringing, how it constrasted with theirs, and musing on how the world has changed and what might happen in the future. no dead chat amongst the undead, that's for sure lmfao. anyway! as much as you like having them around, your favourite bit is when they all hurry home before sunrise, and you get matty (and maybe his best friend) all to yourself - there's nothing wholesome about that bit, though, let me tell you ;) <3

happy halloween!! yes, i have several thoughts about him, and the first is that he's genuinely shit-scared of ghosts despite being practically related to them lmfao - there's no consensus on whether or not they're actually real in this AU, but i think you're a bit of a woo woo diva (if you'd like more info on how i see reader in this au, lmk, but of course i'm aware that it's x reader and you might rather leave it open to your own interpretation!!) and you have a sensitivity for the spirit realm, and the first time you're like "oh. this place is haunted. i can tell we're not alone" when you and matty go into some olf building on a day out... bro is TERRIFIED lol. so are a lot of his vampire friends, actually; you wonder if it's a lingering cultural thing, because it's the older vampires who seem to be most wary (aka not ross, who rolls his eyes whenever his friends start visibly freaking out at the concept of ghosts), and they probably grew up in more superstitious times. regardless, you find it fascinating, and extremely funny - on more than one occasion, you've told a distressed vampire or two to "get a grip. that's basically your cousin" lmfao. in terms of the more sexy stuff, recently he's really been enjoying role reversal in the sense that he likes it when YOU bite HIM, rather than the other way around; vampire skin CAN be broken by human teeth, but it takes a lot of persistence and you really need to do it repeatedly in order to get a hickey to stay put. of course, this means more time for matty with you on top of him, licking and biting and sucking at his neck while you grind down onto him, and he thinks it might be the closest to heaven he'll ever get as a vampire - that said, he hasn't fucked you everywhere yet... anyway, yeah, he gets off when you bite him lol. of course he'll turn you, eventually <3

the set design/setlist meeting is literally insane like the whole band (touring members and all) and you and mrs mac and the guitar techs and carly and joborne and some other people from work (and honestly your daughter and baby hann and the macdonald babies too) all pile into dh hq working out what's what. george and matty are smoking cigs out the window (ross is periodically stealing a puff or two). adam is actually working out the setlist. mrs mac's ignoring matty's ideas and making drafts of stage designs (including the one that ends up being used) as she listens to adam's plans for the setlist. you're making notes of how many risk assessments will need to be done before they play. joborne is probably texting jack antonoff. there's a brief argument about whether or not to do a costume change and then logistically how to do it without consumption/polly solo. you joke that you should just put a sign up saying matty's getting changed and black the stage out. everyone thinks this is a good idea. matty says he thinks the lyrics on a screen for each song would be fun. everyone rips the piss out of him for not being able to remember them. you and mrs mac try to alleviate his subsequent grumpiness by saying the chocolate lyrics should be gibberish as a bit. it works. matty laughs so hard he has a coughing fit (idiot). all the kids in the room (and george) find this highly entertaining. carly is officially asked to sing about you. everyone gets really emotional. you tell her she's taking over matty's screen during her sections. everyone agrees. ross thinks she should just take over from matty in general. nobody actually properly disagrees with him. it's all very fun lol <3

lowkey he's freaking out because she's five now and starting school after the summer holidays!! and she's so ready for it, so chatty and confident and full of fun, but ross is kinda melancholy about it because that's his baby 🥺 like, you all went to get her a schoolbag and a lunchbox last weekend, and even that had him teary lmfao - god help him when you go uniform shopping. but you still have a month of holidays left to enjoy, days out and visiting family and a week in spain with the healys (speaking of, you have a sneaking suspicion matty might cry just as much as you and ross on eilidh's first day of school lol) to look forward to, and it's been lovely so far. and eilidh's old enough that she's starting to really enjoy going to gigs (her father's daughter, truly), so glasto was sooooooooo much fun for her - mostly getting to see olivia rodrigo with matty's gf, and not her dad and aunts and uncles, but she did enjoy jumping up and down during the sound ("now, remember, that's a bad word matty says, so don't you go copying him") and also getting to play on the travelator with her dad and george when the stage was being set up lmfao. coolest kid ever i fear <3