#finn002

Location: fairgrounds, near midnight 

Angel overdid it. She lost track. She knows that, but god, she feels so fucking good. Too good actually, because now, she can’t tell which way is up, which way is down. Her left from her right. She can’t function, can’t hide right there in plain sight. But the twinkling lights from the carnival rides, they’re so pretty. They make her feel so warm and happy and loved. All the sounds, the incessant drone of people living life around her – it feels so much bigger than her, and it’s beautiful. At same time, the offbeat rhythm of her heart rings amplified in her ears, accompanied by the sound of her hitched breath working overtime. 

Somewhere underneath it all is the whisper of the words find Dylan. It’s a quiet repetition, one that’s propelling her forward. Find Dylan. Find Dylan. Find Dylan. But Angel’s phone is dead, and it’s hard to stay focused when it feels like the world is shifting, as if the ground beneath her feet is titling. Find Dylan. 

She just needs to go home. That’s what she needs. There, she will be safe and sound and Finn won’t be mad at her because she will be in her bed when everything in her system decides to settle. Then, everything will be fine. She just needs to find Dylan to help her get there, but suddenly, the world is falling. Or is she the one falling? 

Fuck, Angel thinks, or maybe she says it aloud. She isn’t sure. The grass is soft, inviting. It tickles her arms, wrapping her in a hug and inviting her to stay. A few slow blinks, a few even slower breaths, she thinks she might just stay in this spot forever, sink into the earth and become one with it. But she can’t. The stars are so much prettier here than they were in Chicago. She has to find Dylan. Life is so beautiful. She needs to get up. There really is no better feeling in the entire world, is there? Where’s Dylan? 

Angel’s body is moving before she can register it, her brain playing catch up as she makes her way to her hands and knees. “Okay,” She sighs, trying to balance enough to make it up to her feet when she sees a familiar pair of shoes seemingly coming straight towards her. She tilts her heavy head back just enough to look up and see Finn. “You are not Dylan,” She laughs, words undoubtedly slurring as she reaches for her brother and uses him to pull herself up.

@finnthelosttwin

[Nibs]

Nibs had been thinking about all those words that Finn was saying when he was at the tent and he was confused. It was something that he knew needed to be talked about because if they never actually talked and only fought there would be no closure, there would only be hatred and pain. He thought of himself as being rather close to Finn before and after everything that happened he wasn’t sure how everything got so fucked up as it did.

He makes his way to where Finn was staying before knocking on the door, “Finn, I am not here to fight but we need to seriously talk about some things that you brought up the other day. I think most of our fighting comes from not completely understanding each other and I honestly don’t want to fight with you anymore. You were one of my best friends and I think that maybe if we sit down and talk everything out we can both get some closure on everything that happened.”

[Finn] Finn opened the door and heard Nibs words and just left the door open and turned to walk back into his cabin. “I don’t have much time for this talk, I have papers to file against Maya and I have to focus so what is on your mind?”

[Nibs]

“Why did the things that Misty and I did before she and you got together even bother you? Like...you mentioned you were bothered I asked her to be my fake girlfriend but that was way before I even knew you liked her. All the things you mentioned while at the tent...you were mad at her for things that she did before you got together. And when you did started dating her, I had Ashton at that point and we were engaged so why would you start hitting her and getting angry over things in the past? I never saw her when she was with you because I figured you were making her happy and I trusted you to not hurt her.”

“We were best friends Finn. I honestly never had feelings for her when we were friends. I never had them while you were with her. I never had them while I was getting over the fact that I learned my fiancé was responsible for the death of my daughter, I was busy dealing with trying to keep the wolf pups I adopted safe from Ombra’s hand. By the time all that was settled....I learned that in that time you had been hitting my best friend over things that didn't even concern you. If you had a problem, or if you had questions why didn't you just come ask me? You asked me for advice on what Misty liked when you wanted to ask her out and I gave you advice on how to win her over. So I don't understand how you went from trusting her to all of a sudden not trusting her because of stuff that happened before you were even part of the picture? That's what doesn't make sense to me.”

[Finn] Finn sighed as this was the last thing he wanted to deal with and just looked at Nibs as he let the other speak. “Stop. Please. I hate hearing how much you felt nothing for her. It’s one of the main reasons I can’t talk to you. You continually tell me you had no feelings for her until she fell for you. Do you know how hurtful that is? I wanted to lose Misty to someone that had always loved her. That loved her more than me but you don’t. And that’s what makes me angry. It has always made me angry. When she told me about all the times she was your fake girlfriend and all those times she pretended she slept with you or Ash it pissed me off because you hadn’t done anything for her. Yeah sure you killed Ryan but she did that because she thought she was protecting you. And then you killed him but you didn’t even know the pain she was in. What friend does that? But Misty knew your pain. She could tell me whenever I asked what was going on with you and it was annoying. She cared for you in a way that I was jealous of and I was pissed because you didn’t care for her that way.” “It did concern me. I was there Nibs. She was mine and knowing you used her like that infuriated me. I tried for a very long time to ignore it. But then that rumor...it hurt me in a way you will never understand. And now I get to see you living with the woman I helped. Her being able to feel comfortable with you, that’s not you, that’s me. Her allowing you to kiss and touch her, that’s me. The Queen she is...god you weren’t even there as a friend when she became princess. You annoy me because you don’t deserve her. The love I have for her, I’ve always had. It wasn’t because she fell for me first. And it wasn’t because she was in a bad place. I had a crush on her the moment I saw her on Neverland and you knew that. So how dare you take her from me when you felt shit nothing for her.”

[Nibs]

“I asked her to be my fake girlfriend one time and she slept with Ashton one time. These were not constant things Finn. Actually you had your eyes on Tiger Lily when you first came here at least that's what you told me before. I was there for her when she became princess. I even took her to the castle and she showed me around while you were off doing God knows what. But even then so, why would it matter if I didn't love her before? I loved her as a brother would a sister. I never slept with her while we were friends and it's a good thing too.”

“Here is the thing Finn, when Misty and I were friends we did do things for each other. Whenever she was said, I would cheer her up. Whenever she needed someone to talk to I was there. If she needed me to fake be her boyfriend well then I would have done that for her too. And no it wouldn't have been better for me to have loved her romantically while you were dating or whatever because then that would have just made you more paranoid that we would be together. Look, I don't have control over who I imprint on. It's something that happens when someone's life is put on the line and it's not something that you control.”

“Yeah I liked her when we were friends but not in a romantic way, I never wanted to ruin the friendship her and I had...Yeah I heard people talking about how cute we were and about how we should date but at the same time, I knew she was interested in other people. I wasn't going to stop her because she seemed genuinely happy and that's when I found Ashton. Yeah I got mixed up with Ashton but I was there when she asked me to be. She hated when I would do things for her because she didn't want to seem weak, so unless she told me about it, I trusted her to take care of things.”

“Also for the record, I didn't ‘use’ her, I asked for her help and she said yes. Just as if she wanted me to help her, I would have done the same thing. I stayed away while you two were dating because I was dealing with things and you promised me you were going to take care of her and not hurt her. But then I learned you broke your promise to me and her by hurting her all because she was being a loyal friend to me. She changed a lot because of everything that has happened to her and it's really unfair of you to make the person you claim to love more than life itself go through the pain once more the rendered her in a state where she can't even let her own kids or family touch her because you made her relive the rape and abuse Ryan and you put her through for simply being herself. You put all this blame on me because you are mad that in the end, your choice led to the woman you love leaving you.”

“You had a choice that day Finn, she had already chosen to marry you even after the shit you put her through. In what world, would you call what you put her through,love? I am grateful for you for being there for her as you should have been seeming as you were the one that was going to be her boyfriend. Had I been there, you would have just gotten more paranoid about Misty and I spending time together. You didn’t understand our friendship then and you still don't now.”

[Finn] “It doesn’t matter if you asked her once or asked her everyday, you should have went to someone else. And you must have me confused with my brother who was dating Tiger Lily before falling in love with Slightly. I will never understand your friendship with my girlfriend when you are not only one of my best friends but a lost boy. You and I are always supposed to come first. But you turned on me when you let her fall for you. You talk about how you felt nothing, you should have said that, but I know you didn’t. When she came home from the day in the cave with you, she was so sad and that wasn’t me. That was you. You telling her to move on. I know she would have left for you then but you didn’t want her and she came home heartbroken. You should have stopped before then. But no, you wanted to just have one more notch on your belt. Was taking Sam away from Dylan not enough?” “What happened to you being there for her? If you were there you should know how to handle it. I wanted to show you a part of her that you obviously aren’t used to. The part of her you didn’t help. The part that even now you don’t understand. I don’t feel bad giving you pain. And I care for her but when your ex killed my son I stopped caring about your children.”

[Nibs]

“You don’t get it, I fell for her in that cave or at least I had already begun falling for her. I told her to go back to you though because you had already asked to marry her and she had already said yes. She already chose you, I wasn’t going to be selfish and make her choose me. That was me putting you before my own feelings so don’t you dare tell me that you are pissed that she came home heartbroken. I put our friendship first and I pushed her back to you because I thought you were going to fucking fix yourself and get your shit together. I didn’t want to just steal her away because honestly I was afraid that she was just saying she wanted me because you weren’t giving her the attention she deserved.”

“You still don’t get it, my ex killed your son because you were brought back to life. Pan told Mark there was a price to pay and you knew I would kill you if you hurt Misty. You had your choice to not hurt her Finn, you could have just shown her you loved her instead of pushing her away and going and fucking my ex’s daughter. I don’t have control over Ashton, you know that. So if you want someone to be mad at, be mad at Ashton, he was the one that killed your child, not me. I had broken up with him long before he even went after Misty. I only truly started to fall hard for her was after she came to me in tears when she found you on her wedding day.”

“I never understood why it hurt me as much as it did whenever she came back to me crying about someone hurting her. Why I felt the unending urge to just keep her away from everyone and just be the one to make sure she didn’t give up in love, be the one who was there to pick up the pieces that I should have been the one to pick up. I should have been the one to pick up the pieces but I knew that if you truly wanted to show her you cared that you would take that time to do so. I would give you the chance to show her that you are worthy of her and you chose on your wedding day to cheat on Misty, I never did that, that was all you. Had you not done that she probably would have married you. But you chose to hurt her all on your own. Yes, I told her to go back to you, yes it broke her heart to hear me say that but I thought you deserved another chance Finn. Really I did. I thought maybe you would pull yourself together and show her that you changed who you were but then I find out that you were fucking someone else on your wedding day and she came to me in tears. You know how sad she was when I sent her back to you? Well imagine seeing that but even worse because she saw her future spouse, the person who claimed to have cared about her more than life itself, cheat on her and get another woman knocked up while engaged and about to marry the person who you claimed was the love of your life.”

“Damn it Finn, had you not cheated you probably would have been happy with Misty. I would have let it go, I would have let her be happy with you. I would have pushed my feelings aside, like I always have been so that you could be happy because honestly it’s been so fucking long since I have seen you as happy as you were when you were asking me about how to win Misty over. I always was there for you, I had your back even when I found out that you had been hurting her, I still gave you a chance to make things right and you fucked that up all on your own. I never told you to cheat that day, you had the chance to make your wedding day be the day where you start fresh and you show her that you could treat her properly but you didn’t. So yeah, I did fall for her. Really hard. I couldn’t help that even if I wanted to but since you made your decision, Misty and I had already made ours too. You could even feed from me if you want, just so that you can see that it is true that I never had feelings for her while we were friends. If that is what will help you realize that you literally had nothing to worry about. She and I fell for each other when we were both broken and trying to find ourselves. That is what made us stronger.”

[Finn] “Happy? How can I be happy when I see the one person I want with you? You took my happiness Nibs. You want me to be happy then let her go, but I know you won’t do that. And that’s why we can never be friends again. I am not going to sit around you when I want your wife. I do have some respect.” He replied running a hand through his hair. “Looks like we both broke her. I proposed after she came home and told me about you and her in the cave. I have never wanted to hurt you as badly as that day. So yes Nibs you are to blame for killing my child because had you just left me alone they would be here because Mark would have never went to save me. We have choices, I have owned up to mine. They were shitty. Horrible. But I don’t understand why you think I care that now you have to deal with Misty being afraid to touch you. I don’t want her to touch you. If I could have made her feel that way without fear I would have. I don’t want her to relive that. I was there. I handled it as anyone would. I felt like I was doing something bad and would apologize every time she jumped. I slept on the floor because she would stay up all night if I held her in my arms. I had to check the front door, the windows, the fucking perimeter so she would feel safe. I did that for her. I wasn’t upset I wanted her to be better. But imagine how I feel when my girlfriend won’t let me hold her hand and I know she lets you touch her? She was comfortable with you and yeah I was jealous because why do you get it and I don’t?” “I used to watch her with you and she never flinched. She didn’t shake and she never once stopped smiling. But with me...when she finally let me I cherished her. I made sure she would never let another person make her feel the way she felt and it was never good enough. It wasn’t you. You were effortless. You put in no work and still got her to feel comfortable. She didn’t even say I love you until I put the fucking ring on her hand. She was always afraid and yet still she trusts you. I just...my only flaw was not being you. I can never be friends with you after all that.”

[Nibs]

“Finn, she would have been the same way around me. She didn’t let me touch her when you started to hurt her. I saw her acting weird and I literally have to force her to show me what you had done. And if it meant that much to you why would you go and throw that all away? Why did you take her for granted? You assumed that by you cheating on her with her best friend that it wouldn’t hurt her? You thought that it would make you feel better because you knew she slept with Ashton before you? You had to have some type of feelings for Maya while you were with her otherwise you wouldn’t have done that to Misty at all. She was comfortable with me because we have that history, long before you even came into the picture. She never shaked when she was with me because she knew I wasn’t making any romantic or sexual gestures to her. She knew that I wasn’t looking to touch her in ways that people had violated her. She knew it wasn’t a touch that might trigger her to think about the pain that she was put through. In fact, there were many times when I offered to help take away the pain that she was going through since I knew that it was starting to weigh on her and I didn’t want you to have to worry much about it so I figured it would make it easier on you too. I never thought it would be something bad.”

“Really? You made her feel cherished? You hit her Finn, you got mad and hit her more than once. That is not cherishing someone. You know I have anger issues but you also know that I have learned to channel things in a more healthy manner. I don’t hit people anymore. If I get angry I make sure that I am not around those that I love. She knew you were good enough for her Finn but you kept doubting yourself. You kept doubting her love for you and that is what made everything come undone. You know I would have given Misty back to you had this all been earlier, had this been before I fell for her. But she is my imprint. I can’t change that. I can’t change the feelings that I have for her. She didn’t need you to be me Finn, she needed you to be you. She needed you to be the same caring person who checked the perimeter to make sure no one was there, she needed you to be there for her. But the moment you got her comfortable you jeopardize all that...why? I still don’t understand why? I get that you were jealous, I understand that. But what even made you think of going to Maya when you should have been with Misty? I mean, Misty wasn’t even around me at that point anymore. We maybe hung out once or twice during your relationship with her but that was all.”

[Finn] “Nibs you can’t talk to me about cheating or hitting anyone when you have done both. You might have changed but let’s not pretend you are somehow better than me. We both fucked up. I don’t need to pretend to hide that. So as far as that conversation goes we are done with that. You hit Sam, I hit Misty. You cheated on Ash, I cheated on Misty. Might have been for different reasons but you did it too so chill. And let’s not forget that crush Misty had on Ash before the two of you started dating. I know that you thought just like I did that there was something between them even though they were just friends. And don’t try to deny it. I know all about that drama too, mostly because I was your friend when it was happening.” “You can’t change things and I can’t change things. What’s done is done. You have her and I will never have her back. We lost our friendship and will never have that back. And now she is scared of you and I can’t change that. You have to.” [Nibs]

“I have done both when threatened about the well-being of my family. You might think it doesn’t matter but until Ombra comes to you and threatens to kill everyone you love unless you get someone to turn dark, don’t tell me that what I did wasn’t justified. You have never been put in the situation to choose between some random person you don’t care for, or your own family. Mhm I do remember that drama but I did get over that didn’t I?”

“Why would you put her through pain when you really just want to hurt me? I don’t understand that? Like you know I am obviously going to help her through the fear in time so like honestly what is the point? You are making the person you love go through the worst time of her life all for me to just prove that I will be there for her when I obviously already will be?”

[Finn] “You know why I’m doing it? Because I know you can’t handle it. You probably think she can overcome it with will power or some bullshit like that, but her fear is in her heart. And I did it because I know I can and she will come to me. Because you don’t know. And that’s because you weren’t there. You can say she won’t but I know she will. Because I know how to handle it. And that’s why I did it. I’m okay with her falling out of love with you and coming back to me.”

[Nibs]

“It’s funny that you think you magically will get her to fall in love with you. You know that me and her are bonded for life right? If you try anything, she dies and I don’t think that is something you want. So, yeah she might come to you but our bond and love is what keeps us coming back to each other. It’s not something I expect you to understand and you act like I purposely stole her from you and you know that isn’t the case.”

“Besides like you said before, if you don’t learn from the past you are doomed to repeat it and maybe she does come for help but that doesn’t mean she will stay with you. She will come to you as a friend and then come back to me because like you said, she will always come back to me.”

[Finn]

“Is there a reason you are still here? Did you get everything you wanted off your plate? Because I have better things to do.” Was his only reply as he grabbed the papers off his table.

[Nibs]

“I think you should give Maya another chance. I heard that she was really trying to not go through with the divorce. You never know...maybe she might make you happy like she did before.”

[Finn] “Still looking out for Ash’s family I see.” He huffed standing up. “Thanks but I don’t need your advice on my marriage.”

[Nibs]

“No, I am looking out for yous seeming as you do have two kids with her and of course you don’t that is why you are signing divorce papers instead of trying to work things out.” He shakes his head before going to leave the tent. “Well it was a nice talk while it lasted. It gave me a lot to think about.”

[Finn] Finn watched Nibs leave and shot a fear through his heart. “Let’s see if Misty really loves you. Goodbye Nibs.”

[Nibs]

One short phone call had determined their destination for tonight: the movie theater. Movie nights weren’t uncommon for them, though he usually just had his friends over and made a bunch of popcorn. Today, however, they were going to see one of the most important cinematic releases in ten years. Mamma Mia 2 had hit theaters, and Poe wasn’t going to wait much longer to see it. 

This time, however, he had only invited Finn. The man didn’t seem too surprised by the lack of a group text coordinating schedules or opposed to the idea of spending just a night by themselves. However, Poe  had never exactly called it a date. The word seemed foreign in his mouth, and they had never really classified the night as more than just another movie. 

That didn’t stop his eyes from lighting up when he saw the man walking towards the entrance of the theater. “Hey, I already bought our tickets,” he said with a grin, pulling them out of his pocket. “You ready? We still need to get the popcorn and everything, if you want.”