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So I found this really rad blog recently (femdirection.tumblr.com?) and like... the lads are hot as hell, we know this... I know this very well, I am almost entirely gay and I am blisteringly attracted to all of them anyway, but if they were girls... I think it's safe to say that I'm glad they're not because I would blow up with lust. Anyway... I made some outfits... that I reckon they would wear if they were girls, loosely based off Harry Fucking Styles tweeting about his 'best frock'... that was the main point of that ramble
Everybody's favourite bambi-legged sparkle kitten Harry Styles. A delicate blend of my-collection-of-YSL-shoes-could-fund-your-college-education and homeless-but-living-in-ben-winston's-sex-attic. I don't really think there's much to say here. Tight jeans, dumb hats, chelsea boots... too much jewellery. I put her in Gucci for the red carpet (DON'T CLAIM GUCCI AS YOU) to piss Zayn off but also because leopard print velvet is totally ridiculous enough for her to get behind. The bird earrings made me smile forever. And you KNOW she would wear some dumb ostentatious necklace that says 'chaos'.
My most favouritest scruffy mouse and champion butt wielder Louis Tomlinson who should, regardless of gender, always ALWAYS wear skin tight leather look leggings because that ass... :) snuggly sweaters... you know the drill. Don't talk to me about the anchor necklace because it's late and I'll probably cry a lot. Golden bandage dress for special nights, I think yes (also ass) and very high Louboutins because she MIGHT have a bit of a height complex... Red lipstick and a face that says 'i could kill a man'... Has a whole closet dedicated to football shirts that she tucks into her high waisted shorts. She's a dream. I'm in love.Â
Ahh, beautiful beautiful Zayn, carved from wet dreams by the angels of cheekbones and eyelashes. Can I just say that I love these outfits? Zayn is me, I am Zayn, we are one. Well... we would be if I ever left the house and wore things that weren't my duck onesie and band shirts with no pants. Casual but classy and always a bit of a punk, Zayn has my favourite sense of style I think and he'd be just as fab as a lady. Bit of a mix of Jesy Nelson and his dearly beloved Pezza. Sparkly but not overstated on the red carpet. She'd totally get into that leather skirt trend.Â
i would usually have something cutesie to say about Liam but I'm still mad with him about the 'incident' so I will refrain. Liam's own personal style is the most relaxed, white tshirts and blue jeans, throw some batman stuff in there and maybe a watch that's worth more than my house and she's all set, basically just real Liam but with boobs, she cleans up the nicest though and is probably the only one that can wear a long dress without pulling a Jennifer Lawrence and falling on her face. Sleeveless dresses absolutely have to be a thing because even as a lady she'd have killer biceps and you know it.Â
Last but never least we have our lovely Irish swagmeister extraordinaire Niall, the sweetheart of the band but also a MASSIVE slob who forever has greasy stains all over her stupidly expensive Rag and Bone trackies. She's the girl that wipes dorito stains on her wedding dress. She can't walk in heels to save herself. Pastel colours because BLONDE! Also floral rompers on stage because what a cutie.Â
