#featuring joshua

Lexie balanced the pizza box in one hand, and her bag on her opposite shoulder as she reached into her pocket to pull out her keys.  She grumbled as she searched for them, knowing she had them when she left the hospital because she had to lock her office door.  She found them a moment later and unlocked the door to Josh’s apartment.  “I’m here!” she called out.  “And I brought pizza as promised so we are studying for these boards as promised!  Babe?”

Lexie hadn’t known where else to go after her argument with Derek and packing her suitcase.  Running home to Thatcher would have raised too many questions, and one couldn’t exactly rent an apartment on this short of notice.  Nor could she cause problems for Meredith and her marriage.  Her sister had been there for her, wiped her tears, and offered to run away to Switzerland with her if that’s what she wanted.  She sighed quietly as she got off the elevator, pulling her bag behind her.  

Lexie stopped outside Josh’s door and knocked, waiting for him to answer.  It still wasn’t fair to drag him into this or expect him to fix things for her, but Lexie didn’t know what else to do.  “Come on, please be home,” she muttered.  

Lexie had made sure to head for the attic before everyone arrived home that evening.  She had her bottle of tequila with a second hidden under the bed, and whatever trash she had on in the background on her iPad.  But the tears weren’t stopping, and it had been hours now.  Everyone who was home had tried to come in to comfort her, but Lexie had sent everyone away.  She didn’t want to talk anymore.  She didn’t want to hear it was for the best.  She just wanted to be left the hell alone and not told what to do.  Lexie heard another knock on the door.  “I said to go away,” she growled.  

Valentine’s Day and single was one of the worst combinations known to the universe, especially when everyone else around seemed to be looking at one another with love eyes and hearts flying around their heads.  Maybe loneliness was part of the reason Lexie had agreed to be on-call for any neuro pages.  Everyone else deserved to have their romantic dinners, flowers, and candy.  But of course, she would be paged for a plastics case involving Josh because that was just how the universe worked.  Lexie let herself into the patient’s room.  “You needed a neuro consult Dr. Goldman?” she asked softly, not wanting to startle Josh or the patient.  

“It really should not be this hard to flip a damn pancake,” Lexie muttered as she stared at the frying pan.  She had held organs in her hands, completed delicate sutures, successfully drilled into brains, but she was intimidated by pancakes on Christmas morning.  She had watched hours of Youtube videos the night before on how to make a perfect pancake yet here she was struggling. Lexie bit down on her bottom lip and held tightly to the spatula, seeing the bubbles appear in her pancakes.  “Just flip it,” she muttered hearing the door open.   “Merry Christmas!” she called out to Josh focusing on the flip of the pancake.  “Oh my god!  I did it!” 

Lexie and Josh had spent the better part of the afternoon pulling out his boxes of Christmas decorations and getting the tree set up.  Josh had fluffed the branches while Lexie ran to grab take out and hot chocolate.  A tradition born and bred their first Christmas together in Boston.  “Please don’t tangle yourself in the lights,” Lexie giggled as she watched him with a strand of lights.  “This place is going to be beautiful when we are done.”

Lexie watched from across the hall.  Josh was leaned casually against the nurses station chatting with Mark’s scrub nurse, who he likely knew incredibly well at this point.  She narrowed her eyes as she kept watching them.  Of course.  Of course he was turning out just like Mark after spending the past few months with him.  Was it even really a surprise?  Josh must have said something funny and probably had given her that stupid charming smile because she was laughing now.  A few moments later, the conversation seemed to break up naturally.  Lexie made her way over, dropping her charts with a thud on the counter next to Josh.  

Being at Josh’s apartment was strange.  It was almost like being back in their apartment in Boston, but not.  It was like some strange in between of them and him, and being here for most of the day had given Lexie a chance to study the place even though she had spent majority of the day on the couch watching Sex and The City.  She had even ordered Chinese takeout since she figured he would be home from work soon although she didn’t really know.  It had been almost a full 24 hours since they left the retreat, the first part of switch had been spent exactly as they had planned.  Lexie heard the door open and glanced over her shoulder.  “I ordered dinner!” she announced.