Jun 15, 2016
in course of error a place of rest a striking blade a love, a test twisting churning amber light a wayside blue a time to write a peeling back of just what might a cutting edge a coming night a dead wing passing paper kite
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in course of error a place of rest a striking blade a love, a test twisting churning amber light a wayside blue a time to write a peeling back of just what might a cutting edge a coming night a dead wing passing paper kite
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she was the girl next door a fucking animal inside
Why are you with those people? You are so much better. Â And fuck all that how dare you compare bullshit. Â I donât know why but some people are just better- They are kinder, more loving, more giving, more forgiving, more graceful, more beautiful, more sincere- its like bam itâs all there.
And just as I finished telling her it was over I got this unexpected joy. Â I was like âfuck, stop, this is not the time for smiling.â Â I thought I was going to have to get up and leave, it felt like laughter could actually break any moment. Â The joy felt like a deep rightness for what was happening, what I was doing. Â My fear was gone. Come what may this is happening and the future is fucking bright.
(damn, thatâs so fucked up when i look at it. You can waste alot of years not knowing what itâs about)
She desperately wanted to meet him but when the time came she couldnât do it. Â She knew it was irrational- that he wanted to kill her. Â But the universe had never been friendly to her before and he was just too perfect. Â She could not shake the idea that it was all a trap... another way the universe was going to fuck her over, shatter her heart. Â She loved him deeply. But she did not believe she could beat this. Â So she let him go.
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Find someone that makes it feel important that you are you.
Come
first of all, I tried what the so called sages said built a shrine to my self the blood swelled cold candles burned out early and the things became things I needed her and could not be strong within walls beyond measure a need on fire bee to flower   clam and tide    moon and earth      sun and stars       unblacked expanse with due respect to independents I fucking need her a divided house a hopeless unraveling and I will howl howl howl I will roam deserts and forests forever among bats and bones crunching leaves my light iridescents dancing in the ebbs of moaning wind I will gulp the nightâs mist like poison I will beseech the tallest trees succomb to their tangled limbs cry and yelp yelp yelp to the moon still my heart oâ stars the curse unloosed expectation gathering tragedyÂ
send her to me that I may rest
It just occurred to me that âonly the good die youngâ may not mean what I thought.  Itâs not only the good die early, itâs only the good never grow old.  Iâm totally down with that second one.