So yesterday I got a bikini...
So working for a plus size fashion company does have its perks. And getting a discount is definitely one. And our swimwear came in. And it’s gorgeous. Pretty colours, great patterns and underwire. Oh my god there is underwire!
When I was a teenager with size c boobs, I had an obsession with betting a bikini. You can understand why. I was young, shopped in a lot of surf wear stores (in the early 2000’s too so roxy, quicksilver and billabong were my best friends even if I was already in there largest size) and all my sisters friends (they were my friends too but closer to my sister) were getting them. I knew that the only way I could wear one was with an underwire, and my mum said that if I could find one that I could have it and wear it around the house. I think she didn’t want me to wear it to the beach in case of waves and her teenage daughters breasts falling out for the world to see. Do you think I could find one? One that was fitted and well supported? OH HELL NO! So I gave up on my bikini dream.
Last year we got bikinis. There was only one I wanted. It sold out so quickly and we never got them back in. They were so rare that a customer told me that a set was being sold on eBay for $250. So yeah, I missed out.
This year I wasn’t going to let that happen. I got to work and after all the shit that went down with my manager I started grabbing what I wanted and putting it behind the counter ready to go. I had to get the top off the mannequin. I was so ready to get home and regret buying it all. That I was so desperate for a win that my panic addled state would have made me purchase something that I look disgusting in. I eventually got home. Tried it on and damn son! The amount of confidence I got from putting on that bikini was amazing. It felt insanely good to put that on. I felt so happy. And yes, a size 18 with a tummy, stretch marks and cellulite felt amazing, confident and sexy in a fucking bikini! Never thought it would actually happen.
