#f:fap

"Do you know why there's a fucking clown out on our front lawn?"

Mingyu startles, almost knocking his head against his desk again when he pushes himself up to face his youngest boyfriend.

Minghao looks livid, face red and a bat in hand and Mingyu is relieved that look isn't directed towards him. But he's also confused about why Wonwoo and Junhui aren't with him.

"Clown?" He manages to ask.

Minghao rolls his eyes and pulls Mingyu out of his swivel chair, bringing him to the window and opening the blinds so that Mingyu can look out onto the lawn. Low and behold, there is an actual fucking clown on their front lawn.

"What the fuck?" Mingyu asks.

Minghao sighs and picks up his bat again, letting the blinds close as he walks out of Mingyu's office. Mingyu hears the front door being unlocked and blinks before rushing down the hallway to see Minghao wrench open the front door and march out onto the lawn, bat held high as he approaches the clown.

"GET OFF OUR LAWN!"

"Minghao!" Mingyu yells, running after his boyfriend as he chases the clown around with the bat. "Minghao-yah!"

"Shut up, Mingyu! I'm taking care of business," Minghao shouts as he runs past the elder. "WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON OUR PROPERTY? DO YOU WANT YOUR BRAINS SMASHED IN OR SOMETHING?"

"MINGHAO!"

"SHUT UP, MINGYU!"

Minghao tackles the clown to the ground, knocking its wig askew and revealing lavender colored hair that Mingyu would recognize anywhere.

"IT'S JUN, YOU IDIOT!"

Minghao pauses as he holds the bat aloft, ready to smash it into the clown's face. Junhui promptly removes the wig and red nose, using the sleeve of his costume to wipe some of the makeup away. Minghao throws the bat down and slaps Junhui clean across the face. Mingyu pushes him off and pulls the elder up, laughing as Junhui clutches at his cheek and looks mortally offended.

"What the fuck is your problem, asshole? I was ready to bash in your head!" Minghao shouts, sprawled across the lawn, kicking his feet up in anger.

"I wanted to pull a prank on Mingyu! Not get my ass handed to me by a short stack," Junhui manages to say.

"Hey," Mingyu starts to say, only to be interrupted by Minghao's yell of "WHO YOU CALLING SHORT STACK YOU FUCKING GIANT!"

It's then that Wonwoo decides to pull into the driveway and drag himself out of his car, looking dead tired. The three on the lawn turn to face their lover, blinking owlishly as Wonwoo barely gives them a glance before stumbling his way inside the house, much too tired to deal with whatever the three are bickering about now. The door has barely shut before Minghao starts to argue with Junhui again in rapid Mandarin, probably cursing him and his entire family from the way his entire face goes red again and Junhui clenches his fists in anger.

Mingyu sighs and ignores them, moving towards the car to grab the groceries Wonwoo had left in the back seat and close the door that the elder had left wide open. He locks the car and pushes some of the groceries into Junhui and Minghao's arms, prompting them to argue as they all walk back inside. Wonwoo is slumped against the foyer's wall, asleep and still in his shoes. Minghao helps the elder out of his shoes and guides him towards the couch, still arguing with Junhui as he does. Junhui picks up the groceries Minghao had set down and follows Mingyu into the kitchen, yelling at Minghao in Mandarin, his face becoming redder by the second.

"Shut up," Wonwoo moans from the couch, silencing both Chinese boys.

Still, Mingyu knows they'll be angry at each other for a while longer so he smacks Junhui's butt and tells him to clean up. Minghao goes back outside to retrieve his bat and sets it in the closet, disappearing down the hallway to torment Junhui some more. Mingyu sighs and gets the groceries out, putting away anything they'll need for later and leaving out ingredients he'll need for right now. Wonwoo rouses on the couch, seeming to realize that he made it home in one piece and Mingyu walks towards him, pressing a kiss to his boyfriend's face.

"Hey, you know where you're at?" Mingyu asks because Wonwoo might be awake but that doesn't mean he's aware just yet.

Wonwoo rubs at his eyes and leans up to kiss Mingyu's cheek. "Yeah, I'm home. Where's Jun and Hao?"

Mingyu shrugs, laughing to himself as Wonwoo pushes himself up slowly. "In the bathroom probably hate fucking each other."

"Ew," Wonwoo laughs then hitches himself off the couch. "I'm going to join them."

Mingyu snorts. "Sure, but Junhui's dressed like a clown just so you know."

"What the hell for?" Wonwoo asks.

"To prank me or something, but then Minghao chased him around with a bat and slapped him and then you drove up," Mingyu patiently explains.

Wonwoo shakes his head, before latching onto Mingyu's side. "Better yet, I think I'll just stay here. I wouldn't want to be in the middle of that right now."

Mingyu laughs and hauls the elder towards the kitchen before depositing him on one of their stools. "You'll be in the middle of them later tonight anyway."

"Actually, I think I'm gonna sleep in your office tonight. I have a paper due," Wonwoo mumbles out.

"No."

"What?"

"I said no. You're going to sleep with us in the master bedroom or in one of the spares. You're not going to fall asleep at my desk. You're dog-tired as it is," Mingyu murmurs, running a hand through Wonwoo's hair.

Wonwoo slumps onto the counter. "Fine. But only if you fact-check my paper later."

"Deal."

Wonwoo kisses Mingyu in thanks before falling asleep again and Mingyu sets to work on making dinner.

Just as dinner is being set down at their dining table, Minghao and Junhui reappear, holding hands as they kiss Mingyu on the cheek and thank him for dinner. Mingyu pats their heads and goes to grab Wonwoo, waking the elder up and leading him towards the head of the table. Junhui serves Wonwoo a plate and Minghao takes Wonwoo's spoon from him, feeding him when he realizes that Wonwoo isn't all that awake yet.

Mingyu sits down to eat and the rest of their night is uneventful after that.

  ("Fuck you, Wen Junhui," Minghao growls when they fall into bed later.

Junhui kicks him in the hip, making room for Wonwoo to snuggle in between them. "Shut up. I let you fuck me against the shower wall."

"The both of you, shut up," Mingyu groans as he hitches a leg over Minghao's hip and throws his arm across their chests, fingertips barely reaching Junhui.