#extracredit

Teenagers kiss in this one. It’s entirely unerotic, don’t worry. There’s also violence and homophobia from the young and stupid.

“Given it up, filthy pirate! We’ve got you outnumbered and surrounded! You’re no match for the Twin Adders’ finest!” The taller of two elezen boys shouts his threat out while the pair close in on their target, each wielding training lances a bit bigger than they can truly manage. “Surrender now and you’ll get a fair trial and a swift execution!” The pale youth they were shouting at’s grin spreads ever wider through the process, it was her third favorite part of the game after all.

“My only crime is livin’ free of the tyranny of the law! Just ‘cus you’d rather lick boots than stand on your own ain’t any reason for me to turn myself in!” Though only in her fourteenth summer, the sea wolf was already a physically imposing creature. She towered over both her male ‘assailants’ and already had a frame broader than the elezen were ever likely to develop. That freakish size was no small part of why they were happy to let her always play the villain. Not that she minded, pirates were always the hero in her version of the story anyway. “Besides, I’m thinkin’ you might want to be careful with them words, if’n you don’t want your girl to be a head shorter.”

Reaching behind the tree she was standing so close too, the young roe pulls a fourth teen into the scene; an elezen girl in a dress far too nice to be playing out in the woods and her hands very loosely wrapped in rope in a mockery of being bound. “Ser Charbot! Please! You must save me!” Each word was given with a mockery of enthusiasm only fit to trick the likes of the young or foolish. Thankfully her audience was very much both. After all, they wanted to play ‘knights of the Adders’. “Don’t let her cut off my head! I need that!”

“Lady Shifant!” The boy was better at acting shocked, but admittedly he’d drug her into these games a bit less than happily. Anything to get her to spend less time just sitting around doing boring girl things. The tip of that blunted wooden lance points directly at the grinning sea wolf’s heart as she lays one of the heavy sticks she wields like swords at the elezen girl’s neck. “Forget the trial! You die this day, miscreant!” He and his cohort drop into stance to come charging in, but leave a window open for Brem to get in her retort first. Because that’s how it always works in the stories.

“A shame that the Adders will have to go recruit more lackies to replace you too! More wasted souls.” She’d gone mostly to script up to this point, but there was a thought crawling it’s way up from the back of her mind. A natural instinct against doing what’s expected offering it’s alternative. “Though a good pirate never turns down a chance for a token of good luck..” And with that she presses the sort of spectacularly terrible kiss one masters early. Truly an offense written in spit and tongue to anyone even passingly familiar with the art of smooching. Her partner was entirely too shocked by having kissed another girl to do anything about it, but ‘Ser Charbot’ was fuming.

“What in the FUCK Brem? THAT’S GROSS! GET OFF MY GIRLFRIEND!” His charge turns from a playing mockery to a true assault, driving the broad, blunt end of his lance right into the roe’s chest. The wind rushes out of her even before she lands on her back with a thud and a groan, not finding her footing nearly fast enough to stop the first elezen from leaping on her chest and raining fists down upon her. His girl is locked in a stunned state, but his friend at least came over and held Brem’s legs down to make sure his buddy didn’t get killed when she got free. “GIRLS DON’T KISS GIRLS IN GRIDANIA! YOU FUCKING LIMSAN FREAK!” Each word was paired with another slam of fist against the young woman’s head, never really making an opening for her to throw the boy off.

There’s several minutes of the tirade and beating before ‘Lady Shifant’ starts to pull at her date’s arm, pleading with him to stop ‘before he gets into big trouble’. Eventually either his temper starts to wane or her words break through, and he gives a parting spit onto the new bruised and bloodied face of the would-be pirate. “Next time you want to kiss a girl or pretend to be a man or whatever the fuck that was, go find you one of the poacher cat sluts and leave the good, upstanding girls of Gridania out of your perversions.” Apparently to make sure she laid a little while longer, he dropped a hard boot into the side of the roe’s ribs before the trio started off back to town, leaving the battered Brem laid out alone.

The young sea wolf’s swelling was going down a little now that it’d been a couple of days, but she was still spending almost all of her time in bed. She’d been scolded for fighting again, but seeing as she had clearly lost despite her claims otherwise, Pop had taken a bit easier on her than he would have otherwise. No grand punishments beyond being on popoto peeling duty for a week after she was feeling better. She was about to flop back over and go about plotting the extravagantly detailed revenge murder of two elezen boys when her father poked his head into her and her sisters’ room. “Brem, you’ve got company. It’s the Shifant girl, says she wants your help practice. Want me to send her away?” The pale girl’s eyes widen and she raises up swiftly in bed.

Dear Class, I loved Ferris’s incorporation of art from the Art Institute of Chicago in My Favorite Thing Is Monsters. For extra credit, spend a few hours at the Krannert Art Museum on campus drawing paintings. 

Dear Students,

Images from today’s Saturday Science Drawing Jam in the Discovery building on the UW-Madison campus. Today drew pictures of animals in action. t’s such a rare situation for people of all ages to sit down and draw together about an idea.

Thank you to my students and pals of students who joined us today.

Here we are in the last photo with drawing jam classmate Kirsten who has been coming to the Saturday Science Drawing Jams for three years.

And yes, Bucky as in ACTUAL BUCKY came and sat with us and let us draw his picture.

Today was a sincere and stone cold BLAST!

Sincerely,

CSS EXTRA CREDIT / Black Panthers