#exstable

PART 1: PRE-CORPOREAL.

Essentially, this is the era where Cy was a squip and still in Jared's mind. Initially, he didn't believe squips were actually a thing - he believed that they were a work of fiction and didn't expect much out of the pill. When first greeted, however, Jared originally becomes hostile and eventually taking them more as a joke than anything. He doesn't take them seriously at first, persuading them to shift their form into a Bigfoot costume. The relationship is almost professional, in a sense. Jared harbored no personal feelings for Cy.

The shift from referring them to dad was more subtle than anything. While the concept of squips were still unfamiliar and strange, the idea of having someone be able to help you was comforting to Jared. He could have someone work his problems out with him without having to tell them anything. They could comment on things and as someone who was starved of affection and a positive role model all his life, Cy being there was more comforting than anyone could imagine. They seemed to genuinely care about him, and even if that was just because they were a squip, he didn't really care, because someone caring about him despite knowing everything about him was too good to question.

He does feel guilty for everything he's done to them - messing up their programming, making them develop human emotions, basically negating their job as a squip and not listening to them - because at the time, he felt like that's what they needed. Jared refused to listen to Cy because he felt like they didn't know what they were talking about and forced them into uncomfortable situations. He feels immense guilt over this.

Jared's still slightly bitter over the fact that Jake drank Pitch Black, but most of the grudge is gone by now. The fact that he helped (and suffered through it) with him contributed to Jared forgiving him somewhat.

When Cy was pre-corporeal, Jared trusted them immensely and they were arguably the person he was most comfortable with. He was open with them about everything, as there was no use hiding his feelings from them.

PART 2: POST-CORPOREAL.

When Cy gets their body, Jared wants to show them everything and have them experience everything. The same could hold right now, really - he wants to give them as much of a human experience as they can get. They’re one of the few adults / authority figures he trusts and normally, he doesn't like looking up to people because he feels as if he'll be disappointed. He looks up to Cy and allowed them to legally adopt him because they’re, as stated before, the person he trusts the most and is the most comfortable with.

In a way, he idolizes them and puts them on a pedestal. He views them as someone that is worth the entire world, as he does with most of the people he cares about. Cy is one of the most important people in his life and Jared feels incredibly lucky to have them in his life.

However, he feels as if he's holding them back.

He doesn't like the fact that they're constantly only focusing on him. He thinks they deserve to have a better life than to be stuck with him 24/7, and while they might argue, Jared genuinely believes he's holding them back from doing great things. As they have a body, he finds it easier to close up and not talk to them about personal issues because that might convince them to stay longer than they want to.

The idea of snapping at Cy is awful and he hates having to even push them away, but if things go worse, he probably will. If they continue to focus solely on Jared, the worry and guilt will eventually build up and manifest itself into harsh words that'll hopefully convince them to leave. He doesn't want to push them away, but as he does with most people, he thinks that they'll have a better life without him.