#existentialmoment

Selfish, self-centered, cold, unemotional bitch When it comes to insults and lies about me, I’ve pretty much heard it all in my fifty years on this floating blue rock of a planet. And yet I’m still standing. Why? Because in the end, my life is for me. My work, my writing, my very existence is determined by me and only me. Most of all, I don’t make people ‘uncomfortable’. Anyone who has ever…

I just had to write this down this serendipitous moment. I feel like I’ve discovered several key life secrets that aren’t so secret. Suddenly, these have a visceral effect on my life outlook.

1. Connect the dots.There is no manual to reality and the future. The world is full of clues, puzzle pieces, and stories that we decide to pick up and patch together into our reality. If we continue to seek meaning and connections in everything that comes into contact with our lives, we will constantly build our existential map and fine-tune our compass. I’m approaching life with vigorous and deliberate mindfulness from now on, paying meticulous attention to the details (but careful not to be too bogged down!). Thinking in analogies and metaphors helps. Connecting the dots will lead to inspiration and innovation.

2. Don’t just gain knowledge, experiment to drive results and build wisdom. Data collection is a proactive process, not just a passive process. Decide and act, don’t just think. Puzzle pieces, information, and the wisdom of others are excellent data points, but experimentation is what delivers meaningful results and leads to personal discovery. What’s the point of knowing so much about the world, yet nothing about yourself and how you fit into it?

3. Think and act strategically long-term. I think this is pretty self-explanatory, but the key considerations here are timing, knowing dependent variables, and optimizing. This is an art that requires a fine balance of patience and sense of urgency. To make this happen, focus on the big picture and practice the discipline to delay instant gratification. Not to be mistaken to contradict #2, but taking action or shifting direction may not always be the right thing to do. We don’t have all the time in the world, after all, and I think minimizing the fruitless mistakes along the way is a fair objective.The biggest obstacle to this is wanting to give up because of jadedness and getting lost in the weeds, leading to my next point…

4. Never give up, only move on. It’s not a euphemism - there’s a profound difference. “Giving up” implies everything leading up to the relenting of effort is for naught because we’ve short-circuited our growth, “moving on” asserts the learning curve from the effort has plateaued. It’s important to our personal development to recognize when we’ve outgrown our current state and need to move on; conversely, we must fight the urge to give up, and master the challenge - imminent moments of weakness may lead to erratic decision-making that could steer us off course from our long-term goal.

5. Try your best to see the world as it is and yourself as you are. I had to push out this last one since 4 is bad luck according to Chinese superstition. Just kidding, kinda. Note that I prefaced this with “try your best.” 360 perspective isn’t possible because we perceive with our experience, built upon experience. The least we can do is recognize contingent truths from absolute truths. I’ll have to go into detail with what I mean by this another time, because I’m mentally exhausted and need to get my drank on this Friday night.

I’m told that once you find and follow your career passion, you’re pretty much all set to live a fairy-tale story of loving what you do, every day of your life. I’m not so sure I agree with this. Not that I’m cynical (believe me, I heavily lean towards the dreamer’s end of the spectrum), but this idea can be a bit daunting and set us up for disillusionment. I agree wholeheartedly that we should seek the path our hearts tell us to follow, but wild hearts can lead us down a wavering journey if we’re reckless and unaware of our blind spots. For those who embrace variety, spontaneity, extreme highs and lows, I commend them for their courage and resilience. For some of us who are not as risk-seeking and want to approach life with a steady but full heart and mind, I firmly believe that there is a more fitting mantra to live by.