#existential fears

Who am I, how can I be without atrocity. How long will this fight go on. If it feels like i am acting against my nature, is abstinence the answer? A pain-free and healed version of those things never existed.

How can I live without sin, when there can be no sin-free version for me. What is missing in me, what am I searching, how can i discover.

The answer is unknown to me, because the way, the rulebook, the one clear path, I dont see it. Too much fear in my heart, my lungs, my chest and my head, penetrating deep into my eyes; to take the wrong path. Even more-so to never find one at all.

My sweet fellow, the world is an extremely violent and unforgiving place. One peek at the news and my stomach turns upside down. But where does all of this come from? The nature? No. It’s humanity. Generally considered, our planet is such a beautiful place, it offers and gives us so much, yet we - humanity - destroy it. And we don’t only destroy our planet, we destroy each other. But it’s about how you see the world and how you long to change it. Graduating is a wonderful, yet so scaring part, especially if you don’t have a single clue what the future will bring to you. I felt the same existential fears you feel after I graduated. I did not have a plan for my future, did not feel mature enough to live on my own. Basically, I already saw myself living on the street. But, lovely friend, I can tell you, there are still beautiful souls out there who will support you, who will help you and who will give you chances. You will grow with the experiences you will make and you will learn. You will learn so much and you will gain so much strength. I know you can do this. There is so much potential in yourself, that is yet for you to discover. You’re also going to handle difficulties by the gift of kindness. Whatever you do, be the best version of yourself, because I know the world is a scary place, but as Mahatma Gandhi once said: “Be the change that you wish to see in the world.“

Let’s sit, face to face, get comfy, pass warm smiles and cheesy grins while sipping our current favourite drinks and have a little chat about the importance of life. » The Explanation Post

I've just been on a video that tackles the question "Why do we get sad yet happy when we're in love?" Which is a question that didn't really cross my mind until today. So yeah, the video states that we fear depending on something, because of the question, what happens when that thing is gone? So let me give my two cents on the matter:

We fear love because every one of us fears dependence.  We don't want to depend on something or someone that can be gone in just a flick of the moment. It's so unsure. It's so random. It's so scary. We walk on the safe and easy side of life, we forget to have fun. Love is not a question of what we're willing to give. It's a question of what you're willing to lose. Everything in this life, yes, even your love, will end. We just have to embrace the fact that we might still be alive when it happens. We have to embrace the fact that we're all existential for the proving of existence, and we would never be more than those hours we spend.

You have two actions to deal with love:  either hold on to it, or  let it go. If you let it go, you let everything go. The happiness. The contentment, the phases of euphoria, everything. You let all those things go along with being hurt. That's just the way it is. Or you can hold on to it, knowing it would hurt one or both parties in the end, but you get to experience life in a whole new different level.