#evo 2015

Ledgehog a man to #WasteHisTime 

Interdimensional sources have given Super Smash Brothers Melee fans a fleeting glimpse into several alternate timelines where results of the largest melee tournament in the history of the game differed greatly.

On Earth-2, Druggedfox, an underdog player from Georgia, defeated Leffen in the round of 16 and went on to win the tournament over Armada in the grand finals, successfully tech-chasing the Swede on the final stock an astounding ninety-seven times in a row before up-throwing Armada’s 654% Fox for the kill off the top of Final Destination. At the award ceremony, Druggedfox proceeded to rip off his face and reveal Mew2king underneath, who accepted the trophy and was bestowed a pair of Mad Catz sponsored bionic hands to replace his carpal tunnel ridden real ones.

On Earth-21P, EVO changed all melee sets to best-of-five, resulting in Leffen coming back and defeating Plup’s Samus. In the grand finals, Leffen crushed Armada 6-0 in Fox dittos while simultaneously tweeting trash talk between chain throws during the match. At the award ceremony, Leffen brought Chillindude on stage.

“I’d like to thank Chillin for being my dedicated practice partner these past few months,” Leffen said, giving Chillin a hug. “As a thank you, I’ve decided to give him the B-button from my championship controller.”

Chillin tearfully added, “My… B?”