#evieskies

You were the reason.

You, L/N Y/N, the adorable fourth year undergrad that started volunteering at the same children’s hospital as him a few months ago. 

You with the sweetest deposition and most devastatingly beautiful smile he had ever seen. 

You who had him wrapped around you finger within minute of your very first conversation with one another. 

You who had come into his life only six months ago and completely flipped it around. 

Because now, Lee Felix had the worst crush imaginable on you. 

And it wasn’t one of those cute workplace crushes you hear about. It wasn’t one of those “oh, she’s cute” crushes either.

No. 

It was one of those “holy shit, I’m fucked” type of way crushes.

And he was fucked. Completely and utterly fucked. 

The first thing he thinks of when he wakes up in the morning nowadays? You. What perfume would you be wearing that day if he saw you? What kind of outfit would you have on? How would your hair be styled? What would you order for lunch? What anime or obscure topic would you rant about?

His mind has been so full of everything possible about you that those questions didn’t even begin to breech the surface of his thoughts. Thoughts that he had all before he even took a step out his front door in the morning. 

Thoughts that he should not be having about another person in any way, shape, or form. 

Because he was already in a relationship. 

A long term, healthy, happy relationship. Granted, he did have seven boyfriends— yes seven— but their relationship was everything the man could have asked for. He got to spend everyday with the people he loved most in the world. He received so much love back from seven other people that just thinking about another person made Felix feel like he was greedy. 

And he was. He was greedy. 

But he was also guilty. Guilty of not telling his boyfriends anything about you.

He knew he was in the wrong. He knew that he could talk to his boyfriends about you. He knew that they were always expected to be open about anything and everything. And he wasn’t. They didn’t even know you existed. They didn’t know that you were the reason why he tended to come back from his volunteer shift later than he ever had before. They didn’t know that you were the reason why he was going out more on the weekends without them. They didn’t know you were the reason why he suddenly got interested in certain TV shows and singers. Or that you were the reason he had actually began reading a lot more manga than he ever had before.

They knew nothing and it was all his fault. 

Now all of that guilt was eating him alive. 

Felix loved his boyfriends more than words could ever describe. But now he was also falling for you. 

He was falling fast. Fast to the point he felt like his heart was plunging down from a thirty story building with no parachute. 

He had spent this whole week trying to figure out what to do. He knew that he needed to tell them. He knew that he needed to tell you too. But how? How would he go about that? How would you all react to it? Would he lose you? Would he lose them? 

God, he really could not lose them. 

They were the real reason he woke up every morning. The reason he tried so hard to do his best every day. They were his reason for living. 

He didn’t want to live without you either. But, if any of his boyfriends told him no then he knew he would have to. It was something that he had to come to terms with. 

And now? Now it was the time for Yongbok to face his fears and do it. Because it was obvious that everyone was noticing how off he had been the last few weeks. And him, himself was tired. He was tired of hiding. Tired of pretending. Tired of second guessing what he should do. 

So, he stood in front of the door to the house he shared with his boyfriends, trying his hardest to cement his resolve. He would do this today. He had to do this today. He reached out for the doorknob with shallow breath and immediately his hand hovered, hesitant. 

Just rip the bandaid off, Felix. 

Just do it. 

With a nod to no one but himself, he grabbed the door handle and turned. He pushed open the door and stepped into the foyer. Immediately he was greeted by the sound of laughter coming from the living room and the intoxicating smell of food. 

Minho must be making dinner. 

“I’m home!” Felix called, shutting the door behind him and kicking off his shoes. 

There was the sound of shuffling feet before both Minho and Jeongin appeared. Jeongin was still dressed in his teaching attire— a pair of black slacks and a gray V-neck sweater vest over a white button down— while Minho looked comfy in sweatpants and his cat printed apron over a plain white T-shirt. Minho pointed the wooden spoon he was holding at Felix, eyes narrowed and lips pouty.

“You’re late,” he said. 

Felix let out a soft chuckle. For being the second oldest out of the eight of them, Minho could be adorable sometimes. “Sorry,” he said. “Missed my usual bus.” 

“You could have called me for a ride, Hyung,” Jeongin said. “I would have swung by to pick you up.” 

“It’s all good,” Felix said. He walked over, slipping his arms around the younger’s waist. “But, I do kind of have to talk to you all about something.” 

Minho arched an eyebrow at him. “Oh?” He asked. “Should we be worried?” 

Felix nibbled on the inside of his cheek nervously. Should they be worried? No. Felix thinks he’s the one that should be worried. He’s the one that fucked up. 

“Yongbok-ah,” Minho said, voice softer now. “What’s wrong?” 

Felix shook his head before nuzzling his face into Jeongin’s neck. The younger took that as a cue to run his hand over the blond’s hair. 

“I fucked up,” Felix said voice muffled. 

There were a few beats of silence before Minho spoke up again to ask questions. 

“Do we have a body to hide?” he asked. 

Felix huffed. “No.” 

“Do you owe someone money?” 

A shake of the head. 

“Did you cheat?” 

Felix tensed slightly at that. Did he cheat? No. No he didn’t. But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t feel any less awful right now.

“Yongbok,” Minho said voice firmer now. “Did you sleep with someone?” 

Felix immediately pulled away from Jeongin and stared at Minho with wide eyes. “No,” he rasped, throat feeling dry now. “Fuck no. I would never, Hyung. You know that.” 

Minho and Jeongin both seemed to visibly relax at that. 

“Then your fuck up is fixable,” Minho said. “So, why don’t you and Innie go get washed up and changed into something comfy? I think I’ll make another side or two for dinner while you’re doing that. Then all of us can talk while we eat, hmmm?”

Felix hesitated for a moment. “I—“ 

“Go get your thoughts together,” Minho said cutting him off with finality. “Everyone can wait an extra half hour.” 

“Come on, Hyung,” Jeongin said, grabbing Felix’s hand. He begun tugging him towards the stairs. 

Jeongin didn’t say much of anything else, obviously leaving Felix to collect his thoughts like Minho suggested. But he did stay the whole time. He was gentle as he helped Felix wash up and it had the older man nearly in tears. 

Jeongin had always had a soft spot for Felix. Everyone knew it. Even Felix himself. 

“I love you,” Felix whispered softly. 

Jeongin’s hands that were towel drying the older man’s hair paused. “I love you too,” he said. “Everything will be okay. We’ll figure out whatever is wrong together. The eight of us. Like always.” 

The eight of us. 

Like always. 

Felix shook his head, swallowing doing his insecurity and fear forcibly. “Yeah,” he said. “Yeah. You’re right.” 

Jeongin put up the towel before grabbing the hair drier. “Let’s get our hair dried and then go down to eat,” he said. “I’m starving.”

The two of them took turns blow drying each others hair, falling back into that comfortable silence from before. Once they were finished, they headed back downstairs. Apparently it was just in time too. 

“Good,” Minho said, standing at the bottom of the stairs. “I was about to start screaming. Or worse, send Sung up there to scream at you for me.” 

Jeongin let out a drawled out groan but his expression was fond. “Please no. That would be awful. I can already hear it.” 

Minho snickered and grabbed Felix’s hand. “Come on,” he said. “Let’s eat before all my hard work gets cold and soggy.” 

The three of them headed into the dining room where the other five already were. They all sat at their normal seats and were filling their plates up. 

“Oi piglets,” Minho chided. “You better save some for us or you’re all going into the air fryer.” 

“We would need an industrial sized one then,” Jisung said. 

“Changbin has the money for one,” Jeongin said with a shrug, sliding into his seat. 

“YAH!” Changbin protested, nearly dropping the tongs back into the japchae. “Why is it always me? I swear you all are trying to drain my bank account.” 

“I’m pretty sure that’s impossible even with Lix’s affinity for designer clothes,” Seungmin said. 

“What about Hyunjin’s love for ridiculously expensive art supplies?” Minho asked. 

“Leave my Sennelier paints out of this,” Hyunjin said looking scandalized. 

“Didn’t he just buy you a bunch of Da Vinci brushes last week too?” Seungmin asked. 

“And all three hundred and something Copic markers because apparently he wants to try illustrating with them now,” Changbin grumbled.

“T-three hundred?” Jisung sputtered, a piece of galbi hanging from his chopsticks. 

Changbin nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “Insane right? Who needs three hundred markers?”

Hyunjin pouted. “I do,” he whined. “You bought Lix that Louis Vuitton Beagle bag and you’re really gonna sit here and complain about my markers?”

“Hey that bag is cute!” Felix exclaimed, not being able to control himself. 

The other seven men laughed. Minho and Felix took their own seats before filling up their plates. The table fell into the normal everyday ruckus but today? Today it didn’t give Felix the normal feeling of content and happiness it would have. He stayed quiet and picked at his food while listening to the mix of conversations.

Chan being Chan of course noticed. His eyes zoned in on Felix almost like he was trying to read the younger’s mind. 

“Felix has something to talk about with us,” Minho said. 

Immediately every other conversation came to a halt. All of them were now fully focused on him. 

Felix shrunk on himself a little, feeling the anxiety begin to bubble back up.

“You know you can talk to us about anything, Lix,” Chan said tone gentle. Reassuring in that way that the oldest always was. 

Felix nodded, placing down his chopsticks. “I know,” he said. “It’s just…” He let out a low groan and ran his sweaty palms over his sweatpants.

How do I do this?

“He thinks he fucked up,” Jeongin said.

“Fucked up?” Jisung asked, cheeks still full of food. 

Changbin shook his head at the younger. “Swallow before you speak.” 

“Why do you think you fucked up?” Jisung asked after swallowing. “Did you kill someone? Do we have to hide a body?” 

“That’s what I asked,” Minho said. 

“I draw the line at murder,” Seungmin stated. 

“Some boyfriend you are,” Changbin laughed.

“Sorry, I have decent moral compass?” 

“I’d help you hide a body,” Jeongin said from his spot across from Felix. 

“Innie, you almost became a priest after high school,” Jisung said, obviously amused.

“A queer priest would be lynched in the catholic church,” Jeongin deadpanned. 

Next to him, Hyunjin snorted. “Plus, Felix killing someone is like the wildest idea ever. The man can’t even use a fly swatter and gets Chan to take out the spiders even though he’s Australian too.” 

“Just because I’m Australian, does not mean I’m not afraid of spiders,” Felix defended with a pout. “And I didn’t kill anyone so there’s no body to hide.” 

But I am hiding somebody from you. 

“Is whatever you fucked up why you’ve been so off the last few weeks?” Changbin asked. 

So they did notice.

“We wanted to give you space,” Chan said. “Give you time to get yourself sorted.”

“But we were really close to calling some type of intervention,” Hyunjin said. “You were stress baking and cleaning so much that we were getting really concerned.” 

An intervention? Was it that bad?

Felix stared down at his hands as they rested on top of his thighs. 

Just say it, Felix. 

“I’ve met someone,” he blurted, not daring to raise his head just yet. 

The few moments of silence that passed felt like an eternity. 

“What?” Hyunjin asked finally breaking it. 

Felix raised his head, eyes immediately going to scan over his boyfriends’ faces. Every single one of them looked taken back like what he had just told them was the most shocking thing ever.

“At the children’s hospital,” he continued, voice soft— fragile. “I met someone at the children’s hospital. She’s another volunteer and…” He trailed off not knowing how to continue at the moment. 

“She?” Jisung asked.

Felix nodded. “I know we haven’t talked about adding someone in such a long time,” he acknowledged. “We barely talk about other people at all anymore. But it’s been eating me alive not talking to you all about her because I really…” 

“You like her,” Jeongin said knowing.

“Yes,” Felix admitted. “I really, really like her. I’m sorry.” 

“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Lix,” Chan said.

“Does she know?” Seungmin asked. “About us?”

“No,” Felix said tensely. “I haven’t told her. I wanted to talk to you all first.”

There was another pause of tense silence. The other seven men shared looks. 

“How long have you known her?” Hyunjin asked breaking the silence once again. 

Felix winced at the tone of his voice. Low, cold. Not Hyunjin. 

“Six months,” Felix muttered. 

“Six months?” Hyunjin repeated. His eyes narrowed at Felix. “You’ve known her six months and haven’t told her anything about us? Does she even know you’re in a relationship at all?”

“Hyunjin,” Minho said, a warning tone to his voice. “Six months isn’t too long. Especially when we all agreed we would only consider someone if one of us was serious.” 

Felix’s head drops in shame. “She doesn’t know,” he muttered. “I never told her I was in a relationship.”

“Lix,” Jisung breathed. 

“Are you fucking serious?” Hyunjin hissed. 

“Hyunjin,” Chan warned. 

“No,” Hyunjin shot back. “Don’t ‘Hyunjin’ me. I’ll agree six months isn’t that long. But he should have at least mention he was in some type of relationship. Especially if he is as serious about her as he seems to be.”

“I know,” Felix said, raising his head. His eyes connected with Hyunjin’s. “I know I should have. I regret it every day. I just… I got caught up. And then when I realized, I was terrified. I was terrified how just how much I liked her. I hated the fact that I never mentioned the relationship to her. But then, I didn’t know how to bring it up. Ever since she happened no one has talked about another person. And now we’re finally healed. We’re okay. We’re happy.” He gripped on his sweatpants for a moment before releasing and blew out a breath. “I think a part of me thought maybe if I didn’t bring any of it up that I would eventually get over her. That maybe my feelings were just something that would last a few months and be done. But, the last few weeks I realized that I won’t be able to so easily.”

“You’re falling for her,” Jisung said. 

Felix squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. He couldn’t cry. Not yet. 

“It seems like he already fell,” Changbin said. 

This is my fault. I’ll have to deal with the consequences.

Felix’s eyes opened again. “I think I have,” he said. “And I’m sorry. I know there was a better way to go about this. I know I should have gotten my shit together and told you sooner. I should have told her sooner.” 

“All those times you said you were hanging out with a friend from the hospital the last few months,” Seungmin said, “That was her wasn’t it?

Felix nodded grimly. “Yes,” he said. “They weren’t dates if that’s what you think. She doesn’t know—“ 

“You liked her and took her out,” Hyunjin said. “Multiple times. Even if she doesn’t know you like her that’s still…. It’s fucked up Lix. It’s borderline cheating.” 

Felix’s heart dropped to his gut. 

Cheating? 

“No,” Jeongin said suddenly. His eyes narrowed on Hyunjin. “You of all people don’t get to do that shit.” 

Hyunjin’s eyes widened. “I di—“ 

“You did the same fucking thing and everyone was okay with it,” Jeongin snapped. “Sure, I agree Lix-hyung should have at least mentioned he was in a relationship beforehand. But, didn’t we agree on one thing? Only if we were serious about a person would we talk about adding them to the relationship. Six months is not a long time to get to know someone. And him hanging out with her? That’s him getting to know her more.” 

Hyunjin suddenly looked pale. He slumped back into his seat with a dazed expression on his face. 

“Jeongin—“ 

“I’m not done,” Jeongin said cutting Chan off. 

Felix couldn’t help but grimace at that. Seungmin and Jisung shared the same reaction.

“This is not how we do things,” Jeongin said. “This is not how we work. He obviously regrets it. He’s obviously sorry for it. We never gave you shit for it so we will not be giving him shit for it.” Jeongin looked over at Felix. “You haven’t kissed her, right?” 

Felix shook his head. 

“There. No cheating.” 

The room fell silent after Jeongin finished talking. Everyone seemed lost in thought. 

“I’m sorry,” Felix said after a few moments. “I’m so sorry.” 

“You don’t have to apologize for your feelings, Lix,” Jisung comforted. 

“Jisung’s right,” Chan agreed. “You don’t have to apologize for catching feelings for someone. Jeongin’s also right. You came to us when you knew you were serious about her. That’s what we all agreed on. So we should give her a chance.”

“What if I don’t want to give her a chance?” Hyunjin asked voice shaky. “What if I’m happy with just the eight of us?” 

Felix’s shoulders dropped at that. He should have known. Hyunjin has always talked about how happy he was with the eight of them. 

“Get your head out of your ass,” Minho reprimanded. “Or was Jeongin’s lashing not enough?” 

“No, Minho,” Chan said. “Hyunjin’s allowed to express his feelings about this too.” 

Hyunjin nibbled on his lip. “I just don’t want a repeat of two years ago,” he said. “It was my fault and I…“ 

“She’s not her, Hyunjin,” Felix defended. “At all. And, I understand why you might not want this, Hyune. I do. It’s why I was so scared to talk to you all. But she’s… she’s amazing. She really is.” 

Hyunjin seemed to consider his words. So did everyone else.

“I’m not saying I necessarily agree with Hyunjin,” Seungmin said, an unsure expression on his face. “But do you all think right now is the right time to even consider adding someone?” He ran a hand through his freshly cut, reddish brown hair. “A lot of us are at pretty vulnerable times in our lives. Lix and I are in the middle of our clinical rotations. Hyunjin is finishing up his last year of his masters and is looking for a company to intern at. Not to mention he has another exhibition in a few months. And Jeongin is in his first year teaching. It’s just… a lot.” 

Chan nodded. “There is a lot going on,” he agreed. “It would be something we would have to consider carefully.”  His eyes focused on Hyunjin. “And we all know how much you regret what happened Hyunjin. But that was not your fault. We all made that decision. Just because you were the one to introduce her to the relationship doesn’t mean you’re the only one at blame.” 

Hyunjin looked like he wanted to object but ultimately decided against it. 

“I think we should all take the time to think everything through,” Chan continued once he realized Hyunjin wasn’t going to speak. “We are going to at least meet her. That’s nonnegotiable. She’s important to Felix. And Felix, that means you have to tell her about us. You don’t have to tell her you like her yet or any of that. But you need to let her at least know that you’re in a relationship and what kind of relationship it is.” 

“I will,” Felix said. “Tomorrow. I’ve been helping her study for her midterms.”

“What’s she like?” Jisung asked. 

Felix smiled at the question softly, turning fond at just the though of you. 

“Y/N is amazing,” he said. “She’s beautiful and smart. She’s loving too. You guys should see her with the kids. And she has all these little quirks that remind me of all of you. She’s her own person too obviously. She’s independent. Maybe a little too independent. And she works hard. Her grades are amazing. She’ll definitely be graduating at the top of her year.”

“Y/N?” Seungmin asked, eyebrows furrowed. “That’s her name?” 

Felix nodded. Seungmin looked like he wanted to ask more but ended up just leaning back in his chair and nodding. 

“You’re down bad,” Changbin said a knowing glint in his eyes. “You look sappy as hell.” 

Felix smiled sheepishly and scratched the back of his neck. “I am,” he agreed. “I really am. And I think you all would adore her. I think she would fit easily with us.” 

“And what if she doesn’t want to be in this relationship once you do confess?” Hyunjin asked. 

Felix smile turned sad. “Then that’s something I’ll have to deal with,” he said. “I don’t even know how she’ll react to me being in a polyamorous relationship yet. I don’t think she’d be weird about it but…” He simply shrugged. 

“We don’t want you to get hurt Felix,” Chan said. “If this doesn’t work out then…” 

“It’s a risk that I’m willing to take,” Felix said. “And again. I’ll have to deal with. Getting your feelings hurt is just a part of being human sadly.” He squared his shoulders, looking more determined. “It’s all of us or none. If you don’t want this then fine. I’d rather lose her than lose any of you. I love you all more than anything. I will not give this up for anything. It will always be you.” 

“Okay,” Hyunjin agreed after a minute. He let out a heavy sigh, shoulders relaxing and arms dropping. “Okay, yeah. We should meet her. I’m sorry for being so… defensive.” 

Felix shook his head. “You have every right to be,” he said. “I’m sorry for the way I went about this all.” 

Changbin reached over and threaded his fingers through the younger’s hair. “It’s okay,” he said. “We know you’re serious about this. We will be too, hmm?” 

After a few more agreements from the table, Minho changed subjects. Felix was grateful for that. They all chatted while they finished up eating. Some were more chatty than others. 

Felix stayed quiet, carefully listening to what everyone said. He could feel Hyunjin eyes on him but when he tried to catch his gaze, he was avoided awkwardly. Felix let out a heavy sigh and once again slumped in his seat. 

Minho nudged his leg under the table causing Felix’s head to snap over to him. Without a word, Minho just tilted his chin at Hyunjin with a questioning looked. 

Felix simply shrugged.

Apparently, Hyunjin really didn’t want this. 

I’ll end up having to get over her, won’t I?

By the time Felix finished with helping clean up all the anxiety had been replaced by exhaustion. 

“I’m going to turn in early,” he said to his boyfriends. “I have an earlier shift than normal tomorrow.” 

“Okay,” Changbin said, pressing a soft his to his temple.

“Get some sleep,Lix,” Jisung said, plopping himself onto of Jeongin who had already made himself comfortable on the couch. 

The youngest groaned under him. “Get off,” he protested.

“Never,” Jisung said in a sing song tone. He snuggled closer to the man earning another groan and a grumbled complaint that Felix didn’t catch.

“Can I…” Hyunjin grabbed Felix’s hand and slotted their fingers together. “Can I sleep with you tonight?”

Felix perked up a little at the question. “Yeah, of course you can.” 

The two of them wished goodnight to all the rest of their boyfriends before heading upstairs. They moved through the steps to get ready for bed in a surprisingly comfortable silence. 

“I want to apologize,” Hyunjin said once they were snuggled under the covers of Felix’s bed. 

“There’s nothing for you to apologize for,” Felix said, wrapping his arms around Hyunjin. 

“There is,” Hyunjin said. “I was an asshole. A hypocrite.” He let out a heavy sigh, snuggling into the blond closer. “I just… I really am scared that something like before would happen again.” 

“I think we all are,” Felix said. His hand slipped under Hyunjin’s tee and rubbed soothing circles at the small of his back. “I know we are. But, Y/N isn’t like her, Hyun. And, if this is something you really don’t want then I accept that. Really. I just want… no. I need you to be truthful.” 

“It’s not that I don’t want it,” Hyunjin said. “It’s just… It caught me off guard. I’ve been stressed out with everything lately that I was irritable and not thinking things through. I want to meet her. I do. And I will.” 

Felix pressed a kiss to Hyunjin’s forehead. “I happy you’re willing to,” he said. “Just please be honest with me about how you feel from now on.”

“I will be, Lix,” he said. “I love you.” 

“I love you too. So much.” 

MASTERLIST | NEXT >

©heybrownieboy | do not copy, repost, or translate my work

You shifted in your dinning room chair trying you hardest to swallow the nervousness you were feeling. “I may seem a little perverted but I think the curiosity is getting the best of me,” you said. 

Felix laughed again and tilted his head with an overly amused smile. “Oh?” He asked. “What are you curious about, sweetheart?” 

You flushed at the term of endearment. “How does it work?” You blurted. 

“How does what work?” 

“Sex.” 

There was a brief pause before he started to ask. “You don’t know how men have se—“ 

“I know that!” you exclaimed embarrassed, cutting him off. “I meant how… how do you all like… ugh!” You threw you hands up in defeat. 

Felix’s smile turned into a full grown grin and the way his eyes lit up with amusement had you groaning to yourself. 

He was enjoying this. 

The bastard. I should throw my textbook at his ass.

“Relax,” he said. “Take your time.” 

“It’s just…” you said. “There’s eight of you. There’s got to be some differences in preferences.”

“There is,” Felix confirmed.

“So like, how do you all deal with that?” 

“We were all kind of young when we got together,” he admitted, “and most of us were pretty inexperienced. So, we learned a lot as we went. But, we sit down and talk about it. Regularly because preferences can change and things can go ways people didn’t want. It wouldn’t be fair nor safe to not know these things about one another and to set boundaries.”

You nodded. “Is it hard to balance it all?” you asked. “Like making sure no one feels left out when it comes to that?” 

“Maybe a little at first it was,” he said. Felix’s eyes locked onto yours and you caught a glint of something you couldn’t read. “But now? No. No one feels left out. We’re very… active so everyone feels satisfied.” 

You blinked at him, slowly processing his statement. “So, you’re a slut?” 

“Hell yeah I am,” Felix agreed with a grin. “I have seven hot boyfriends.” 

You pouted. “Lucky,” you grumbled. Then your eyes lit up again. “So how do decide who tops and who bottoms? Or is it more of a go with the flow thing?”

“You’re going for the real questions now?” the man asked, even more amused— if  that was even possible.

“Why not?” You asked with a shrug.

Felix bite his lip, obviously in thought. “Most of us are technically switches so yeah,” he said, “it’s more of a ‘go with the flow thing’. Our the three oldest are tops. Especially our oldest. He’s strictly a top. Literally the most naturally dominate man I’ve ever met. The other two will bottom for him. But, when it comes to each other? Well, that’s a whole thing between them.” 

“Sounds interesting?” you pondered.

“I guess you could say whoever is the strongest wins,” Felix said. He grabbed the glass of water you gave him when he first arrived and took a sip. “Minho is older so, I do think Changbin tends to give up easier sometimes.” 

First Jeongin. 

Now Minho and Changbin. 

Slowly you were learning his boyfriends names. 

Only four more.

“What about you?” you asked. 

Felix smirked, setting the glass back down on the table before scooting a little closer. He leaned over the table slightly and tilted his head in a way that had the confidence you were gaining completely vanish. 

“Hmm?” he hummed. “What about me?”

You opened your mouth to speak but promptly shut it. 

“You want to know which if I top or bottom more?” he asked, voice low. “If I’m more submissive or dominant?”

Your throat ran dry at the sound of his voice. Low and smooth. 

God he’d be so good at talking someone through it. 

Fuck no. 

Shut up, Y/N! He’s taken!

“It depends on what the others want,” Felix continued after a moment, his pretty brown eyes locked on you. “I love pleasing others so usually whatever they want from me they get. I liked being used. Simple as that.” 

He likes being used?!

“Y/N you’re blushing,” Felix teased. 

“Shut up!” you grumbled. 

“What about you?” Felix asked. 

“What about me?” You asked. “You mean my preferences?” 

Felix nodded. 

“I don’t really know,” you said lightly. 

“What do you mean?” 

“My sex life is non- existent,” you said with a pout.  

Felix blinked at you. His face slowly morphed into something confused? Surprised? You couldn’t tell exactly. 

“Are you a virgin?” He asked, slowly.

“Technically? Yes. I’ve never gone all the way with someone before” You let out a soft sigh. “And the few things that I have done weren’t very… satisfying.”

Felix seemed almost dazed. His eyes darted across your face, lips slightly parted. “So no one has ever made you cum?” He asked. He grabbed the water to take another sip. 

You ignored the way your ears warmed at the question. 

You’re adults and you’re friends. You can talk about this. You started it! 

“Nope,” you answered. “Only my vibrator.” 

Felix nearly choked on the water. “Vi-vibrator?”

© evieskies 2026 | do not copy, repost, or translate my work

Felix sucked in a deep breath, eyes locking with yours. “What do you think about poly relationships?” 

You blink a few times, confusion taking over. Tilting your head at him you ask, “Poly relationships?” 

He nodded. “Are you against them or do you think they’re weird?” 

“No. I’m not against them nor do think they’re weird. If everyone is happy in the relationship and it works for them, I really don’t see the problem.” 

“You seem sure in your answer,” Felix said obviously a little surprised. “Most people aren’t.” 

“I had a senior last year that was in a poly relationship,” you said with a shrug. “So, I’m not exactly new to it.” 

“Wait, really?” 

You nodded. “It was actually my first kind of… interaction-- if that’s the right way to put it— with one.” You smiled a little. “I knew he was in a relationship but I had no idea it was with multiple people. But one day I saw him kissing one guy and then the next day I saw him kissing another. So I was like oh my god! He’s cheating?! He didn’t seem like the cheating type you know? He was so sweet and such a gentleman. It actually threw me off. But then one of the other seniors in the class explained that he was a poly relationship. Before that I had honestly never given that type of relationship much thought. It wasn’t that I was against them or anything obviously, its just I’ve never actually witnessed one before that.” 

“Were you close to this senior?” Felix asked. 

“Not really?” You said. “We got paired up for a project randomly in the middle of the semester so it wasn’t like we didn’t talk. But he wasn’t one to share a lot about his personal life. He was really introverted but really, really cute. And like I said a gentleman. Even though he didn’t share much about himself he was always really sweet to me.” 

“You had a crush on him, didn’t you?” Felix teased. 

You pouted. “Maybe a tiny one. Again he was cute and sweet but he was taken so I would never go for him.” 

“Even though he was in a poly relationship?” 

“Yes? One he was in a relationship with two men so, I genuinely don’t know if he would even swing my way too. And again, he was taken. He may have multiple partners but I understand not all of those relationships are just… open?”

Felix hummed in understanding. “But if it was,” he said almost unsure, “do you think you could picture yourself in that type of relationship.” 

You sat back in your chair thinking. “I don’t know? That’s definitely something I haven’t given thought to before. But if I was being honest, probably not. I mean, I have had crushes on multiple people at once. But actually being in love with multiple people and dating them all at once might be too much for me. It just seems like…” You trailed off, trying to find the right wording. 

“A lot of work?” Felix asked almost knowingly. 

You winced a little but nodded none of the less. “Again, I’m not against them. At all. I’m definitely a love who you want, however you want type of person. But I think for me, I can barely take care of and keep up with myself. So, the thought of trying to do that with one other person alone is daunting. Multiple people? I don’t think I could.” 

“Did your senior never talk to you about how his relationship worked at least?” 

“Nope. I don’t even think he knew that I knew. I never mentioned it because I didn’t want him to be uncomfortable. He really did not share his personal life so I thought that if I brought it up, he would pull away. Especially because I know relationships like that a really looked down on.” 

Felix nodded at that. “I can confirm a relationship like that is a lot of work,” he said. 

“Huh?” You asked, confused. 

“I’m in a poly relationship.” 

“HUH?!” 

Multiple people in the cafe whipped their heads around to stare at you after your loud outburst. You sunk into your seat more, glaring at a cackling Felix. 

“I didn’t even know you were in any type of relationship to begin with, Lix,” you said, honestly shocked— and maybe a little heartbroken. “But now you’re telling me you have multiple partners?” 

“Seven to be exact,” Felix said with a soft smile. “I have seven boyfriends. We all live together too.” 

That had your eyes almost bugging out of your head. “S-s-seven?” 

Felix nodded. “Yep.” 

“How do you…” 

“How do I manage it?” Felix asked knowingly. 

You nodded.

“Trust me it was difficult at first  to find the a balance but over the years we’ve gotten better” he said. “A lot actually. We’re all very in tune with one another. And yes, it can be a lot of work but I wouldn’t trade it for the world honestly.” 

“There’s no jealousy or like… I don’t know, fights about things?” 

“Jealousy between us? No. They all are kind of possessive though.” Felix laughed at that. “And yeah, we have arguments. Not many but I think in any type of relationship you will eventually, you know?. But we’re all very open with one another. We sit down and talk things out. We all take care of one another and our feelings.” 

“Did you start dating all at once or?” You asked even more curious now. 

Felix laughed again. “Oh god no,” he said. “It was gradual? It took a good two— almost three— years for us all to actually get together.” 

You smiled softly at Felix. Even though the shock — and admittedly heartbreak— of the man you have the biggest crush on was actually already taken was still ebbing at your heart, you couldn’t help but feel happy for him. Because he looked happy. His eyes were glowing and he had this smile while talking about them that showed his love already. 

“So it isn’t a date whoever you want type of relationship?” You asked. But then panicked. “Not to sound rude—“ 

Felix smiled at you. “It’s not rude don’t worry,” he said. “I know a relationship like mine can be confusing but I don’t mind explaining it. We’re in a closed relationship. Well, in a way? It was definitely a trial and error thing for a good while. But we’ve never shied away from sharing our crushes with one another.  But it’s strictly if you date one, you date all. All eight of us have to agree too. We’ve had two people be added before but they…” He trailed off for a moment almost seemingly pained. He took a deep breath before continuing. “They didn’t work out. So, over the last few years it really has just been the eight of us. None of us have proposed bringing anyone else in.” 

His eyes settled back on you, his gaze soft. “I am one of the more open side about sharing our relationship than some of the others,” he said. “But even then, it’s not often because we do get a lot of criticism. It’s not like it’s necessarily a secret or anything. A lot of people know about it actually. But, you’re my friend. And I really like you. So, I wanted to share this with you because I would love for you to meet them Y/N.” 

You shifted a little. “Meet them?” You asked. 

“One of my boyfriend’s childhood friends, Lia, is having a birthday party soon,” Felix said, scrounging through his bag. “A lot of people from the university are going to be there though so it’s not like you wouldn’t know anyone.” He handed you a pretty pink envelope. “I asked if I could bring a ‘plus one’ since all of my boyfriends already have their own invites. She agreed and gave me another one for you.” 

You took the invite carefully from his hands. “Wait,” you said. “Lia? As in Choi Jisu?” 

Felix nodded. “You’ve heard of her?” 

“Yeah,” you said. “I went to high school with her girlfriend.” 

“You went to high school with Yuna?!” Felix exclaimed. 

You laughed a little. “We graduated the same year? We weren’t close cause I was only there our senior year. We did share literature classes our  first and second year of university though. She mentioned Lia a couple times when we did talk. Plus, Haewon is friends with her too.” 

“You need a bigger friend group Y/N,” Felix said. 

“I have plenty of friends thank you,” you said with a pout.

“Your friend group consists of Sunoo, Sangwon, and Seunghan,” Felix said deadpan. “And why all S names?” 

“Don’t shit on my boys,” you said. “I’m friends with Jaehyun too so, it’s not all S.”

“You need more female friends.” 

“I have female friends.” 

“You barely hang out with Haewon, Y/N. I think you and Yuna would be great friends honestly.” 

You pouted more. 

“Come to the party,” Felix said. “Meet my boyfriends and maybe make friends with Yuna at least.”  

“I don’t know,” you said. “It’s not like I don’t want to meet your boyfriends, Lix. I do. I really do. But I’m not the most comfortable in going to a party without one of my friends you know.” 

“You’re not comfortable going somewhere without Sunoo,” Felix said with a knowing look.

You winced a little at that. Okay, maybe you were a little too dependent and attached to your best friend. 

“Can I think about it?” You asked. 

“Of course you can,” Felix said. “And if you don’t want to go to the party then, I understand. Maybe we can figure out somewhere else for you to meet them all where you’d be comfortable.” 

— — — 

“So you’re telling me,” Sunoo began, “that the guy you’ve had a massive crush on for months, is in already in a relationship and he never told you?” 

You stopped your pacing and turned to look at your best friend who was currently sitting on the edge your bed. Sangwon was stretched out on it behind him, comfortably lounging into your pillows. 

“That’s not even all of it,” you said. 

“There’s no way it can get worse,” Sangwon said, voice obviously heavy with exhaustion. 

“He’s in a relationship with seven other men.” 

Now that had Sangwon sitting up. He and Sunoo both stared at you, wide eyed. 

“What?” Sangwon asked, now sounding very much awake. 

“What the fuck is your luck?” Sunoo asked. “First it was the senior you never talk about anymore and now Lee Felix? Both of your crushes, two years in a row are in poly relationships?” 

“With all men,” Sangwon added. 

You groaned, walking over to your bed and plopping down next to Sunoo.

“I was thinking about confessing to Felix,” you mumbled, resting your head against Sunoo’s shoulder. 

“You were?” Sangwon asked, obviously a little surprised. 

“After the project,” you said. “I don’t know. There were times I thought that maybe he was attracted to me or maybe that he actually liked me a little bit. But now I know he’s a taken man and I was being delusional. My luck really is shit.” 

“I thought you were all ‘my crushes are just crushes I am not ready for a relationship’?” Sunoo asked. 

“But it’s Lee Felix,” you sighed. 

“Okay yeah,” Sunoo agreed. “Understandable.” 

“He wants me to meet them.” 

“His boyfriends?” Sangwon asked. 

You nodded slowly, cheek still pressed against Sunoo’s shoulder. “At Lia’s birthday party. He gave me an invite.” 

“Yuna’s girlfriend?” Sunoo asked. 

You hummed. 

“I don’t see the problem with that?” Sangwon said. “He obviously considers you to be a close friend if he wants you to actually meet them all.” 

“But she doesn’t want to be just friends with him Won,” Sunoo corrected. 

You shook your head at that. “I want to keep our friendship. He’s an amazing person. I’ll get over my crush eventually.”

“You really need more female friends,” Sangwon said with a sigh.

“You sound just like Lix,” you replied with a pout. 

“Do you not want to meet his boyfriends?” Sunoo asked. 

“I do,” you said. “It’s just…” 

“You don’t like going to parties,” Sangwon finished. 

You nodded. “Lix said I would probably know people there. And I mean I know Yuna. We’re just not close. Plus Haewon is most likely gonna be there. But... I don’t know. It’s weird if you guys aren’t there.” 

“We need invites to get in?” Sunoo asked. 

“That’s what it seems like yeah,” you said. 

“I’ll ask Yuna then,” Sangwon said. “Maybe I can get ones for Seunghan and Jaehyun too.” 

“I love you Wonnie.” 

“Yeah, yeah.” 

Felix’s eyes snapped up from his phone and over to Minho. “What?” He asked. 

“Y/N. You didn’t tell us a lot about her the other day. That is who you’ve been texting all morning is it not?”  

From the corner of his eye, Felix noticed Hyunjin’s shoulders tensing up. He couldn’t blame him. Not at all. Felix knew that Hyunjin was still hesitant. In all honesty, he knew that all of his boyfriends were. About the whole thing. But they were trying for him. They were going to meet you for him. 

And for that, Felix was grateful. 

“Yeah, she’s been really stressed out about her midterms,” Felix said, setting his phone down on the granite top of the island. “They start Monday and she’s freaking out a bit. So, I agreed to meet her later today to help her while she crams.” 

“You mentioned that before,” Seungmin said. “That you were helping her study for midterms and you have been for awhile so I’m assuming she’s an undergrad still.” 

Felix nodded. “She is,” he said. “A fourth year. Same year as Yuna. Actually, she went to the same high school as her. And Min, you know one of her best friends from the dance studio. Lee Sangwon.”

“Sangwonie?” Minho asked, still working on the soup. He gave a little nod. “He’s there at least four times a week. He’s also a regular at our workshops.” 

“Wait, isn’t that Leo’s boyfriend?” Jisung asked with the tilt of his head. 

“Yeah,” Changbin said. “I met him a few times when Leo and I worked on those songs last year.” He scratched the back of his neck. “Chan-hyung is going to have an aneurysm when he finds out just how young she is.” 

Jeongin huffed in amusement. “He acts like the age gap between him and me is insane,” he said. “He’ll definitely have some choice words.” 

“She’s not that much younger,” Felix said with a playful roll of his eyes. “And Chris needs to stop acting like he’s some kind of old man or something.” 

“He’s pushing thirty,” Seungmin said. “That is old.” 

“In what world is thirty old?! He’s literally in his prime years right now.” 

“He definitely is,” Jisung said almost dreamily. “He’s been getting so big.” 

“Oh god,” Seungmin mummbled.

“Jisung stop being a slut for ten minutes,” Minho chided, finally turning around. “We’re here to gather info about Felix’s crush before we meet her.”

Jisung pouted but nodded anyway. He leaned back into Changbin’s chest. Felix bit back a laugh. 

“Is she trying to go into med school?” Jeongin asked. 

Felix nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “She wants to be an Oncologist. Well, at least she thinks she does.” 

“Tell her not to do it,” Seungmin said, suddenly serious. “It will drain the life out of her like it did you and me.” 

“I think Yongbok looks pretty lively,” Minho said, eyeing the taller man up and down. “You though? Not so much.” 

That earned a middle finger from Seungmin causing Minho and the rest of them to laugh. 

“No one looks as dead as 3RACHA after they’ve finally met the deadline for one of their commissioned songs,” Hyunjin snickered. 

“Making KPOP songs is hard as fuck anymore!” Jisung protested, dramatically. 

“Yeah,” Changbin agreed with a nod. “These companies have become pickier and pickier with what they want.” 

“And every song you’ve produced in the last two years have charted in some way,” Jeongin said. 

“Y/N’s a fan of 3RACHA,” Felix added. “Like a really big fan. She’s been listening to you guys since 2017.” 

Jisung stared at him with comically wide eyes. “No way,” he breathed. 

“Why would she like any of our old stuff?” Changbin grumbled. 

Felix grinned. “She loves your old stuff. Especially Dragon Three and Domestic Banana.” 

Jeongin and Hyunjin both burst out laughing. 

“Not Domestic Banana!” Jisung whined. 

“It’s better than WOW,” Changbin grumbled. 

“She quotes your songs regularly,” Felix said, amusement dripping from his voice. “And you should have seen my face when I saw her listening to Matryoshka for the first time. I couldn’t believe it.” 

“Matryoshka!” Jeongin, Seungmin, and Minho all mimicked loudly in Changbin’s tone.

Hyunjin nearly fell off the stool from how hard he was laughing. Felix quickly grabbed his arm to hold the man up.

“Shut up!” Jisung and Changbin both wailed sounding agonized. 

“You guys act like your old mixtapes were terrible,” Felix said, still laughing.

“Because they are!” Jisung protested. 

“No they’re not,” Minho countered. “They’re fun.” 

“And the word plays are top tier,” Seungmin added.

“Y/N says they should rerecord them and actually put them on streaming apps,” Felix said. “And that they sound sell physical albums too.”

“She’s so right though,” Jeongin agreed. “They’d make bank.” 

Changbin pinched the bridge of his nose. “We are not rerecording them. Ever.” 

“Aww what a shame,” Minho cooed. 

“If she met you guys and found out who you were I think she’d freak out,” Felix said. “Like legitimately. She is a die hard fan. And guess who her favorite is?” 

“Who?” Jisung asked. 

Felix grinned. “You,” he said. “She follows like five J.One fan pages and literally stopped one of our study sessions last week because you went live on Instagram.” 

Jisung eyes sparkled. “Really?” He asked excitedly. “Now I really wanna meet her. Especially since you have never been the one to entertain a crush.” 

“Says you,” Felix countered. 

Jisung shrugged. “Why would I when I get to look at Minho’s beautiful face every morning?” 

“Are you in this relationship for him only?” Jeongin asked, teasingly.

They all already knew the answer to that. Jisung was probably the most sappy about his love for all his boyfriends. The hard drive full of love songs he’s made for them was testament to that. “Hey!” Jisung said, pointing a finger at them threateningly. “I started dating Chan and Changbin before any of you. So suck it!” 

“Yeah, yeah,” Seungmin said rolling his eyes but the fond smile on his face gave away his true feelings. “We understand that 3RACHA getting together is the catalyst for the rest of us.” 

“It wasn’t Chan-hyung or I though,” Changbin said. “It was all Jisung remember? And then what? Like two months later he told Felix and everything just kinda went from there.” 

“I still can’t believe it took Minho-hyung over a year to join,” Felix said, shaking his head. 

“He was upset his Jisungie was already taken,” Seungmin taunted. 

Minho clicked his tongue disapprovingly. “It took Jeongin even longer than that.” 

“I was escaping the grips of an evil, repressive Church,” Jeongin said. “And my family.” 

“I still can’t believe your horny ass almost become a priest after high school,” Hyunjin laughed. 

“I’m pretty sure you were the reason,” Changbin said. “He saw you and had the worst gay awakening in queer history I think.” 

Jeongin huffed out a laugh of his own. “I legitimately thought I was going to go to hell,” he said. “To me, my only redemption was that I was still attracted to women.” 

“That was me when I first met Chan,” Felix said. “My poor little Catholic self.” 

“What was it about Chan and Hyunjin being everyone’s gay awakening?” Jisung asked. 

“They weren’t everybody’s,” Minho said. “Mine was Taecyeon. The first time I saw him on the T.V I just knew I liked men.” 

Changbin nearly choked on his protein shake. “That’s why you always were so shy about greeting him at JYP?” 

“Obviously!” 

All seven of them broke into laughter.

“Tell us more about her,” Minho said to Felix before turning back around to focus on the food.

“She’s really, really into the arts,” Felix said. “She’s an amazing artist like Hyunjin. Her sketchbooks are insane.” 

“Does she paint?” Hyunjin asked almost hopefully.

Felix smiled and nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “The only time I’ve seen her paint is with the kids at the hospital but she says she likes to do it in her free time too. She also likes fashion. She can out dress anyone. And she loves photography.” Felix paused for a moment thinking. “She cooks and bakes a lot. She says it helps her clear her mind. Her grandparents forced her to learn how to play classic instruments when she was a kid so she knows how to play the piano, cello, and guitar. Her preferred exercise is stuff like hiking or swimming but she’s picked up a pilates class a few months ago. She’s actual really outdoorsy. She used to camp and go on trips to the mountains with her family when she lived in America. She loves, loves, manga and anime. She said that if she wasn’t planning on going into medicine she would probably be a mangaka or animator. She even dreamt of working for Studio Ghibli when she a kid.” 

“She like Studio Ghibli?!” Jisung squeaked. He clapped his hands together. “I needed to meet this girl yesterday! Seriously!”

“She’s going to be at Lia’s party, right?” Hyunjin asked.

“Maybe,” Felix answered with a shrug. “She’s not a fan of big, fancy parties. But, her friends might be going and she would probably feel a lot more comfortable with them there. If she ends up not going, I was thinking maybe we can invite her over for dinner or maybe go on a picnic.” 

“We haven’t been on a picnic yet this year,” Jeongin said. “It’d be a good opportunity for pictures.” 

“You sound just like Y/N.” Felix’s eyes settled on Seungmin who looked lost in thought. “What’s wrong, Minnie?” 

“Her name sounds familiar,” he muttered. 

“I mean she is pretty popular,” Felix said. “So, you’ve probably heard of her. Or, Yuna might have mentioned her. They’re not super close or anything but they do hangout sometimes.” 

“Yeah,” Seungmin said. “Yeah, probably.” 

Felix noticed the way his eyebrows were scrunched. The way he seemed to be going back into his brain. He wanted to ask but he decided against it. 

Let him get his thoughts together first. 

“If she’s the girl I think she is,” Minho started, “then good eye, Yongbok-ah.” He began grabbing bowls and plates from from the cupboards. 

Jeongin immediately hopped up to help. 

Felix tilted his head. “The girl you think she is?” 

“I’ve seen Sangwon and his friends with a girl occasionally at the studio,” Minho explained as he started filling up plates with breakfast. “And she’s been to a few of the showcases. If that’s Y/N, then she’s pretty.” 

“Y/N’s beautiful,” Felix said, softly. “The first time I saw her I think I had one of those ‘oh shit’ moments, you know?”

“But you didn’t fall for her just because of her looks,” Hyunjin said. 

“Oh god no,” Felix said He accepted a bowl of rice Jeongin had filled. “Her personality is what I fell for. I think the first time I legitimately realized I was falling for her was when I was watching her play with the kids. It was like everything really clicked in that moment.” 

“That’s so fucking cute,” Changbin muttered. 

The kitchen fell into a comfortable silence as Minho and Jeongin served breakfast. Felix sighed in content when a bowl of the Chinese herbal chicken soup Minho had made. 

“What time are you meeting her today?” Minho asked, sliding into his seat next to Seungmin. 

“Around four,” Felix said. “I’ll probably just chill and play video games till then.” 

“You’re never chill when you play video games,” Seungmin taunted. 

Felix scrunched his nose. “Shut it.” 

“What about everyone else,” Minho said. “We don’t have any plans together until tomorrow so…” 

“I’m probably gonna go to my studio,” Hyunjin said. “I have an idea for a new piece.” 

“Another one?” Seungmin asked. “You’ve been on a roll lately.” 

“Yep and I’m going to squeeze out every ounce of creative juice I have.” 

“I can squeeze out some of your juice out of you if you want,” Jisung offered, wiggling his eyebrows.

Changbin visibly cringed, pushing the younger off him. “That’s disgusting.”

“Stay away from me you heathen,” Hyunjin grumbled.

“Why are you so horny today?” Jeongin asked in pure amusement.

“I was supposed to get laid this morning but when I woke up Channie was gone,” Jisung whined. 

“Oh my god,” Seungmin huffed. He rolled his eyes. “Ridiculous.” 

“That’s why you insisted on sleeping with him last night,” Minho cackled. 

Jisung nodded enthusiastically. “Morning sex is the best,” he stated like it was the most obvious fact. 

“More like you like to use being tired as an excuse not to have to do anything,” Hyunjin snickered. 

“Nah that just a bonus,” Jisung said with a grin. 

Felix shook his head while trying to bite back an amused smile. “You’re insatiable,” he said. 

“Says you!” Jisung protested. “You and Changbin were loud as hell last night. For hours. And you locked the door! So mean.” 

“I did that to piss your voyeur ass off,” Changbin stated before popping a piece of chicken in his mouth. 

Jisung flipped the middle finger at the man, earning a satisfied grin. 

“Well, anyway,” Seungmin said, rolling his eyes in obviously false annoyance. “I am locking myself in my room to read. I deserve some peace and quiet.” 

“Understandable,” Minho said with a nod. 

“I’m going to get some paperwork for my class’s next field trip done,” Jeongin said, “and then tonight I’m going out with the guys. We’re going to see a movie and then go to get BBQ afterwards.”

“Call me if you need a ride,” Changbin said. “Don’t get too drunk. You get freakier than Chan when you are.” 

“No one is freakier than Chan,” Seungmin deadpanned. 

Felix laughed. “Don’t let him hear you say that.” 

“Poor Y/N,” Minho said. “If she does join this relationship she’s going to have a lot to get used to.” 

< PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT >

©heybrownieboy | do not copy, repost, or translate my work

He was like sunshine impersonated. Cheerful and kind even when he was exhausted from juggling both his clinical rotations and volunteer shifts at the local children’s hospital. The type of person who loved talking to other people and would drop everything just to help someone out. He was always so attentive with the children the two of you worked with. The one that would be the most active in the playroom with them, happily subject to their every whim.

Today however, Felix didn’t step one foot in the playroom. Instead he stuck with the older charge nurse and helped her with every random task he was given. 

And it wasn’t just that. He had barely said a word to you when you were together. The two of you had clicked immediately when you first met. And now you usually yapped nonstop with one another— talking about everything and nothing. You immediately took his silence as him wanting some time to himself. That’s something you understood perfectly well. Time to yourself to think. To often overthink. Time work out whatever was bothering you then and come up with a solution. 

But, when you asked if he wanted to skip your regular study session at Cafe Miroh, he had immediately said no. Even when you insisted that it was okay. You’d understand if he was tired and needed the rest of the day to himself. 

“You have midterms coming up,” he had said. “I want to help you prepare for them.” 

And so here the two of you were, sitting in the at your normal table towards the back. Felix still hadn’t said much and for the first half hour you two were there, he seemed lost in thought. He hadn’t even scanned over his notes from his rotations yesterday. They just sat open on the table, a few highlighters pilled next to them and, clear of any marks. 

You decided to let the older man be though and focused on the Immunology textbook in front of you filled with colorful post its and sticky tabs. He’ll talk when he wants to. If he wants to. And even if he didn’t speak a word to you the whole time, you didn’t mind the silence. You didn’t mind giving him comfort by just sitting here with him if that’s what he needed. 

You did your best to drown out the bustle around you. The cafe always got a rush during this time of the day. Most people were getting off of work or out of classes for the day. You eyes scanned over a rather long paragraph, jotting down little notes on your sticky tabs. 

“So, I kind of have a question for you.” 

Felix’s sudden statement after such a long silence had you freezing. Your hand hovered in the air slightly above your notebook still holding your pink pen. Your eyes flickered up and met his. 

“And I might kind of have an answer for you,” you said, playfully. 

You hoped to break some of the tension but, instantly knew you failed when the freckled man in front of you huffed out a “laugh” and ran a ring clad hand through his freshly re-dyed blond hair. His shoulders were the tensest they’ve been all day and the way was kept fidgeting with his rings screamed that he was nervous about something. 

“What’s wrong?” You asked, sitting up straighter in your chair. 

Felix shook his head at that. “Nothing’s wrong,” he said, reaching for his bubble tea and taking a sip.

You arched an eyebrow at him knowingly. “Lix,” you said, “you’ve been off all day.” 

Felix winced. “I’m just tired,” he said, almost like he was trying to reassure himself more than you. He took another sip of his drink before setting it down. 

Your eyes softened. “I understand that,” you said. “But something else is obviously bothering you. If you need to ask me something, go ahead. Or, if you just need someone to talk with, I’m more than willing.” 

Felix’s shoulders began to relax at your words. “I just need—“ he shook his head before starting again. “I just wanted your opinion on something.”

Yeah, whatever this  question was about is definitely bothering him.

“Must be important then,” you stated. 

Felix shrugged. “Eh,” he muttered, “it’s more strange than anything.” 

Now that had you even more curious. “Okay,” you said with a nod. “Ask away.” 

Felix sucked in a deep breath, eyes locking with yours. “What do you think about polyamorous relationships?” 

You blink a few times, confusion taking over now. Tilting your head at him you ask, “Polyamorous relationships?” 

He nodded stiffly. “I just wanted to know where you would stand with them.”

You blinked a few times. “Where I stand?” you muttered to yourself. 

“I realize I’m putting you on the spot with this question,” he said. “But please don’t feel like you have to hold back on your opinion.” 

“I’m not sure if I really have one,” you said slowly. “I don’t really have experience with them?”

“Yeah,” Felix agreed. “They’re definitely not something you come across everyday.” 

You nibbled at your lip in thought.

What did you think about them? 

You honestly didn’t have much knowledge of them at all. You had seen people talking about them on social media a few times but that was social media. You had never actually witnessed one— if that was even the right way to put it— in real life before. 

Felix shifted in his chair while he waited for you to continue and was visibly nervous.

For your answer? 

Was it bothering him that much? 

Did it mean that much to him? 

You tucked a piece of stray hair behind your ear before speaking. “For me,” you said, “I’ve always been and always will be a love who you want to love, how you want to love person. So, I think if everyone in the relationship is satisfied, consenting, and happy then it’s perfectly fine.”

Felix nodded seemingly pondering your answer. “So,” he said almost hesitantly,  “you wouldn’t find them disgusting?” 

Your eyes widened a little and you shook your head. “No,” you said firmly. “Not at all.”

“And if I told you I was in one?” he asked. 

It felt as though the world stopped. You blinked rapidly at him.

“Huh?” You asked, confused. 

“I’m in a poly relationship.” 

“HUH?!” 

Multiple people in the cafe whipped their heads around to stare at you after your loud outburst. You sunk deep into your seat, violently blushing from embarrassment and glared at a now cackling Felix. 

“Sorry for dropping it on you like this,” Felix said. 

You stared at him shellshocked. 

He was in a relationship? With multiple people? 

You could feel your heart start to break a little. But you ignored it. He was telling you something that obviously was extremely important to him. Something that made him nervous and on edge all day. 

And he was deciding to trust you with it. 

You cherished that.

So what if you had the biggest fucking crush on him? He was a taken man and you were going to respect that.

“How many?” you blurted but quickly cringed. “Sorry.”

Great, Y/N. Just great. 

Felix smiled at you softly. “Seven,” he said. “I have seven boyfriends.”

That had your eyes almost bugging out of your head. SEVEN?!

“S-s-seven?” you sputtered. 

SEVEN?

Felix nodded. “Yep. We all live together too.” 

SEVEN BOYFRIENDS?

And they all live together?

Holy shit.

“How do you…” you trailed off, still very much in shock.

“How do I manage it?” Felix asked knowingly. 

You nodded eagerly. 

“Trust me it was difficult at first,” he said, “Finding how to balance everything and meet everyone’s needs. But, over the years we’ve gotten better.” 

Years? He’s been in this relationship for years?

“A lot better actually,” Felix continued after a moment. “We’re all very in tune with one another. And it is a lot of work. Seriously. But, I wouldn’t trade it for the world.”

Your heart clenched at the sight of him. He looked all starry eyed and smitten. 

He loves them. All of them. You could tell it already just by the few things he’s said.

“I didn’t even know you were in any type of relationship to begin with, Lix,” you said, trying your hardest to keep your voice stable.

Felix shoulders sunk but this time in sorrow instead of relief. “I know,” he said. “I should have let you know sooner—“ 

“No,” you said with a shake of your head. 

You reached across the table and grabbed his hand but then began to pull back once you realized it might have not been appropriate to do. Not anymore now that you know about his relationship. Felix immediately grabbed your hand back, his thumb gently sliding over your knuckles— a habit you noticed he had pretty early on in your friendship. 

“It’s your private life,” you continued, giving him a soft smile. “I’m honestly so happy and honored that you’re trusting me with this. I know it can’t be the easiest.” 

“It’s not,” he agreed. “Our relationship isn’t a secret. It never has been and never will be. We’ve never really cared if people know. Especially me. I’ve always been loud about my love for them. But, there is times when it can be a lot. Where it can hurt. Not even just the criticism from others but also finding people that genuinely want to be and stay friends with us after finding out.”  He nibbled on his lips. “It’s the reason I was so nervous to tell you. It shouldn’t have taken me six months to even mention that I was in a relationship though. I’m truly sorry for that.” 

“There’s no reason to apologize, Lix,” you reassured. 

“I just…” Felix squeezed your hand lightly. “I really treasure your friendship, Y/N. I treasure you. I don’t think I’ve ever connected with someone the way I connected with you.” 

You stayed quiet, knowing he had more to say. Even though your heart was practically jumping out of your chest. 

“There were so many times when I wanted to tell you sooner,” he admitted. “But I don’t know. I got caught up with how comfortable it was with you. It terrified me. The thought of losing that. I have a lot of friends sure. But, I don’t have a lot close friends. Best friends. Not like you.”

You pouted at him dramatically, eyes stinging with tears. “Keep being sappy and you’re gonna make me cry all over my notes.” 

Felix let out a watery laugh, his own eyes a little glossy. 

“I’m in the same boat,” you said. “I have my friends from high school. And I love the guys more than anything. They’re my family at this point, you know?” 

Felix nodded, eyes soft. 

“But I’ve always found it difficult to make friends,” you continued. “Especially close ones. The five of them… they are the closest I’ve ever been to people before. Even back in America. When I lived there, I was a lot more social. I had a lot of friends. A lot of acquaintances. But I wasn’t close to anyone. I didn’t have that sort of connection. I was popular. Too popular. And it got to me. People got to me. They used me for it and I hated it. I think that’s what makes it hard for me to connect with anyone even till this day.” You let out a soft sigh, rolling your shoulders a bit. “You’re one of the first real friends I made in university. I’m really grateful for that Lix. And I’m grateful you feel the same way. I’m not angry, hurt, or disappointed you didn’t tell me about your relationship. I understand why you would be scared. Even people you think you can trust and that are close to you can hurt you.” 

Felix squeezed your hand. A solemn expression took over his face after a moment. “Most of us have been disowned by our families,” he said.

It felt as though you had a bucket of cold water poured on you. 

“What?” You breathed.

“It was inventible,” Felix said. “We all knew it. With our type of relationship.” 

“I’m so sorry, Lix,” you whispered, heart broken for the man. 

Felix shook his head and gave you a sad smile. “It sucks, yes,” he admitted, “but we all have come to terms with it for the most part. We chose our love and happiness over our family’s and society’s expectations. It was the best decision I have ever made. A decision I don’t regret.” 

You gave a nod but stayed quiet, knowing he had more to say. 

“Like I said before,” he continued, “we don’t hide our relationship. We aren’t ashamed of it. But it can still hurt when people find out and things go south. I’ve never been scared of telling someone about us before. Not even my parents and I haven’t talked to them in almost three years now because of it. But with you everything was so easy. I can be myself with you like I can around my boyfriends. I don’t have to be what people expect of me. I don’t have to worry about fitting into the mold they expect me to. That’s something I don’t have a lot of. So, the thought of losing you… it broke my heart.” 

You were the one to squeeze his hand. “Lix, I’ll accept all of you,” you said. “Every part. You have nothing to be ashamed of with me. I would never judge you for being human. For loving the way you want to. You won’t lose me.”

Felix lifted you hand a pressed a soft kiss to the back of it. “Thank you,” he muttered setting your hand down. 

You simply nodded, lost in thought. There was so much you wanted to know but you didn’t want to be rude. You didn’t want to offend him in anyway but the curiosity was getting to you. 

And you were thankful for it. Curiosity was better than the way your heart felt like it was spilt in two. Better than the realization that you lost you chance at ever confessing to him. 

“You look like you have questions,” Felix said, pulling you out of your thoughts. 

You opened your mouth to say something put promptly shut it. Should you ask? 

“I don’t want to be rude?” you said unsure. 

Felix let out a soft laugh. “I don’t think asking questions when you’re just trying to understand something is rude,” he said. “And I’ve never been the type to mind answering questions people have about my relationship. Really. I know it’s something that can be hard for some people to understand and there’s a heavy stigma around it. So honestly, I much rather people ask questions so I can clear up any confusion and not just have them assume things. Because all relationships are different, you know? And our relationship isn’t what people often think a polyamorous relationship is.” 

“What do you mean?” you asked. 

“Most think that people only say they’re polyamorous so they can cheat,” Felix said. “Which trust me, there are ton of people like that. And I think that’s what has left such a big stigma around it. A lot of people have been really hurt by cheaters claiming they’re poly.”  

You nodded. “I get that,” you said. 

“But like I said, all relationships are different. There are different types of polyamorous relationships. Well, I should say different dynamics. For me and my boyfriends, we can’t just date anyone we want. We can’t have another relationship out of ours or anything like that.” 

“So it’s a closed relationship?” 

“Yes and no?” Felix paused in thought for a moment. “See we didn’t start as eight,” he explained. “We built up to it and it's just been us for awhile now. There was a time when we did bring someone else into our relationship but it didn’t end up working out. Because for us, we’re a packaged deal. You don’t get to date just one or a few. It’s either all of us or none of us and if even one person were to disagree, then it’s a no go. Simple as that.” 

“So you guys will probably stay as eight then?” You asked. 

There was a look in Felix’s eyes that you couldn’t quite place. “Maybe? Like I said, we did almost add someone before but, that ended up falling through kind of quick. We’ve had discussions before if we would be open to adding someone else and had always been pretty open about sharing our crushes with one another. But, I think we’ve gotten really comfortable as eight. We work as eight. We’ve literally talked about the future together as eight.” He shifted in his chair slightly, almost as if he was uncomfortable. “But, there’s always a chance that all of that could change.” 

You titled your head at that. Oh? “Is there someone you guys are interested in?” 

Felix didn’t say something for a moment. You could tell he was trying to find the right words just by the look on his face. You knew that struggle all too well. 

“Yeah,” he said finally. His eyes flickered over your face as if he was searching for something. “Well, one of us is interested in them. They haven’t met all of us yet so that makes things a little bit complicated.” 

“Is it because of jealousy or?” 

“Maybe a tiny bit? But I think it’s mainly because it’s just been us for so long, you know?” 

“Change can be scary,” you agreed. “And you said you guys were comfortable as eight. It just might take some time for everyone to warm up to the idea. I just… I hope you all make the decision together.” 

Someone else might get the chance to be with Felix. 

Well, Felix and seven other men. 

That still baffled you. 

“We are,” Felix said. “It’s been a little bumpy but we’ll get through it. I know we will.” He paused for a moment. “I was also wondering if you wanted to meet them?”

You blinked at him. “Meet them?”

Felix nodded, gaze soft. “I think you’d get along with all of them honestly,” he said. “And I think they’d adore you.”

Could you do it? 

Meet your crush’s boyfriends? 

No. No. No. Don’t get jealous, Y/N. You have no right to be.

“I’d love to meet them,” you said reassuring yourself more than him.

You will not be one of those people. You were not going to risk losing your friendship with Felix by turning into some green-eyed monster. 

You would love to meet them. To meet the people that make him so happy. 

Felix beamed at you. One of his genuine smiles that put the sun to shame. “One of my boyfriend’s childhood friends, Lia, is having a birthday party soon,” he said, scrounging through his bag. “Her girlfriend is in your year so there will definitely be people you know there.” He handed you a pretty baby pink envelope. “I was hoping maybe you could meet them there. If you wanted.”  

You accepted the envelope and immediately winced. It was high quality and textured with a gold wax seal on the back. It already screamed black tie. Which mean you had to buy a dress if you were to go. 

This university specifically was full of a bunch of rich people so you shouldn’t be surprised. But still. 

Parties like this were not something you enjoyed. 

“Lia?” You asked as you stared to open the envelope. “As in Choi Jisu?” 

Felix nodded. “You’ve heard of her?” 

You hummed in acknowledgement. “I went to high school with her girlfriend.” 

“You went to school with Yuna?!” Felix exclaimed surprised. 

You laughed a little. “I was literally in the same class with her, Sunoo, and Sangwon,” you said. “I never really fell into her friend group but she’s close to Jaehyun and Seunghan so, we’re chill with each other.” 

You pulled out the invitation, eyes scanning over it. 

Just as you suspected, it was black tie.

You shouldn’t be surprised. Lia’s family was rich. Like almost Chaebol level rich.

“I talked to Yuna about getting that for you,” Felix said. “She said she was already planning to give you one anyway. Same with the rest of your friends. So, you won’t be alone. At all. I know you aren’t big on parties.” 

“I like parties,” you said. “Just not…” You sighed heavily. “I don’t have great experiences with socialite parties. They’re stuffy and full of a bunch of evil snobs.” 

Felix barked out a laugh. “You can say that again,” he agreed, amused. “I’m not big on them either. But, I’ll let you in on something. The parents and the rest of the older rich snobs only stay for like the first two hours. After that it turns into a student only party. Where we can let loose and actually have fun.” 

You arched an eyebrow. “Oh?” 

Felix nodded. “Yep,” he said. “Lia’s parties have always been like that. Her parents are chill but her grandparents… not so much. So, that’s the agreement they came up with. There’s also an actual afterparty. Well, usually it’s a sleepover. Only for her and Yuna’s closest friends. I could ask her if you and the guys can do that too.”

“Can I think about it?” you asked, still a little wary. 

“Of course you can,” Felix said. “And if the party is something you really don’t want to do that’s okay. We could arrange another time for you to meet my boyfriends. Something more chill like dinner at our place. Or maybe a picnic. You’ve been mentioning you wanted to go on one since the weather’s been so nice.” 

You hummed happily. “A picnic sounds so nice,” you said. “The flowers have been looking amazing lately. I need you to take some pictures of me for Instagram.” 

Felix chuckled. “I’m your personal photographer now?” 

You nodded. “Yep. You and Sangwon take the best photos, I swear.” You slipped the invitation back into its envelope before slipping it into your bag. “But, I’ll talk with the guys about it. I’m gonna be completely honest and say they’re most likely gonna drag me to the party anyway. Sunoo’s probably going to drag me dress shopping not even a second after Yuna gives him an invite.” 

“I would love for you to go to the party,” he said. “And I promise you I won’t let any snobs near you.” 

“That’s gonna be hard when that’s literally over half of the university.” 

“Ain’t that the truth.” 

< PREVIOUS | MASTERLIST | NEXT >

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Minho swore his brain shut down like a computer and probably even made the sound to boot. He stared at you, dazed and confused with wide eyes. 

One blink. Two blinks. Then three blinks in rapid succession.

All that could be heard as the two of you stared at each other was the ticking of the clock on the kitchen wall and the low hum of the refrigerator. 

“What?” he finally managed to get out after a ridiculous amount of time. 

“Will you—“ Your mouth snapped shut when Minho shook his head and held up his hand.

“I heard that,” he confirmed. 

“Then will you?” You asked. 

Minho squinted at you. “Are you drunk?” He asked, hand dropping back down slowly.

“Does that matter?” 

“Yes,” he answered, baffled. 

What do you mean “does that matter”? What the fuck?

“I had a few drinks,” you said, shifting on the kitchen stool you were currently sat. You grabbed your water from the island and took a sip.

“So you are drunk.” Minho sighed. 

He should have known. There was no way you of all people would be asking him that. 

“I still want to know if you’ll to have sex with me,” you said, like it was the easiest thing in the world. 

All the while, you had Minho nearly choking on his spit.

“Why?” He rasped. “Why all of the sudden?” 

“I’m a virgin,” you stated.

More confusion. More blinks. “Okay…” 

“And I don’t want to be one anymore.”

“Again, why are you asking me?” Minho asked, pointing at himself to emphasize his point. “You could ask one of your fr—“ It was Minho’s turn to snap his mouth shut but by his own volition. The idea of you sleeping with another person made his stomach churn uncomfortably. 

“Because it’s you,” you said. “I trust you. A lot. And while I may want to get this whole virginity thing done and over with, I don’t particularly want my first time to be shit. I…”

You paused for a moment to take a deep breath and Minho willed himself not to watch your chest rise and fall. 

“I know that with you,” you continued, “it won’t be. You’re soft with me. Attentive. I know you’ll take care of me.”

“For a drunk you really gave this some thought,” Minho mumbled. 

“I’m not drunk,” you protested without much venom. “I’m buzzed, yes. But drunk? No. Sadly not. And besides, don’t they say drunk words are sober thoughts?” 

“So you’ve thought about fucking me?” Minho asked, almost exasperated. 

You shrugged. “You’re hot so I don’t think that’s much of a surprise.” 

“Yes the fuck it is.” Minho ran a hand down his face slowly. He let out a heavy sigh, his shoulder dropping. “Your brother would have my head on a stake for even entertaining this idea. You know that right?” 

You rolled your eyes. “Chanhee doesn’t have a say in what I do anymore,” you said. “It’s not his business. At all. I’m not a child and I haven’t been for a long time now.”

Minho hummed. He had to agree with that. “Still,” he continued after a moment. “You’re his sister and he’s my best friend. There’s definitely a rule about this somewhere in the bro code.” 

“The bro code?” You asked, amused. “Does that even exist in your friend group? Cause I’m pretty sure half of you have slept with the same people. And didn’t Changmin date Vernon’s ex at one point? Not very bro code-y if you ask me.” 

Minho cringed a little. “Okay, yeah. You have a point.” 

“Look,” you said shrugging, “it’s just sex.”

“Just sex,” Minho repeated, deadpan. “But you’re still going to lengths to make sure it’s good.” 

A blush blossom across your cheeks. Minho eyes zoned in on the way your pretty, glossy lips pressed together in a pout. 

“I’d rather not have the worse night ever by hooking up with some random guy at the bar,” you said. 

You had just came back from the bar with your friends. And Minho had been staying over at your family’s house while his apartment was out of commission due to a water leak. That’s why the two of you were here in the first place. His eyes flickered over to the clock on the kitchen wall. 2:34 A.M. 

Minho wondered if you had planned to go home with someone else at the bar tonight. If you had come to the conclusion that it wouldn’t be a good idea. That you should ask someone you’re close to. That you should ask him. 

His eyes snapped back to you when you cleared your throat. You shifted again, obviously beginning to grown antsy at his lack of answer. 

“If you don’t want to,” you said, “you obviously don’t have to. I’ll ask someone else.” 

More stomach churning and a sudden wave of nauseous hit Minho. He shook his head, maybe a little too frantically. “That’s not…” He trailed off, letting his eyes close for a moment. “It’s not that,” he began again. “I just… I don’t know. You dropping this on me when I’m half asleep really thew me off.” 

You winced. “Sorry,” you apologized sheepishly. 

“It’s fine,” Minho said. 

But is it? Is it fine?

He needed time to think about it. To try to wrap his brain around it all. And right now he was way too tired to do that clearly. 

He figured he’ll probably say no. He should say no. But he needed to find a way to not hurt you.

“Can I think about it?” He asked after yet another moment of silence. 

Your eyes widened a little in surprise but you quickly followed up with a nod. “Of course,” you said. “Of course you can.”

Minho nodded, grabbing the glass of water that he had originally came to the kitchen for and turned to the exit. He looked over his shoulder at you. “Get some sleep,” he said. “I’ll see you at brunch.” 

You nodded again, looking a little dazed. Minho wanted to scoff. You were the dazed one? After what you had just thrown at him? 

“Goodnight, Y/N.” 

“Goodnight, Min.”

“I hate to say it but I feel like Felix was leading you on.” 

Your whole body stiffened at Seunghan’s words.

“What?” you rasped. 

“Now is not the time,” Sunoo hissed.

You shook your head. “No, tell me what you mean by that.” 

“After almost every single volunteer shift the two of you go out to eat,” Seunghan continued. “Which yeah, friends can do. He asks if you wanted to study with him and that ended up becoming a regular thing, even though you’re a good three years apart. Also something friends can do. But then, he starts buying you presents because they remind him of you. He watched multiple of your favorite TV shows and movies so he can talk to you about them. He then proceeds to take you to the aquarium after you explicitly told him that it was one of your dream dates. Which is an absolutely insane thing to do while 'just friends’. Not to mention, he got you two a reservation to one of the most exclusive fucking restaurants in the whole city, just because you said wanted to know what all the hype was about.” He ran a hand through his hair, obviously stressed. “He did all of that while already being in a relationship Y/N. A relationship he didn’t tell you about.” 

“He had his reasons for not telling me,” you defended.

“I get that,” Seunghan said. “And trust me, I’m glad that he was okay with you mentioning the… nature of his relationship to us. But still. Even if he didn’t want you to know he was poly right away, he could have at least hinted that he was in some sort of relationship. I don’t know, maybe a drop a ‘my boyfriend’ here or there? Anything to say he wasn’t single.” 

“Maybe he hinted before and I missed it,” you muttered.

Had you?

Were you too caught up in your crush on him?

“You?” Sangwon asked. “You don’t miss stuff like that Y/N. You’re one of the most observant people I know. You would have picked it up right away.” 

“He likes you,” Seunghan said. “The things he’s done for you and with you over the last like three months screams that he likes you.”

You opened your mouth to say something, anything but couldn’t. 

Was he leading you on? 

Lee Felix? He didn’t seem like the type.

“To me,” Seunghan continued after a few more beats of silence, “it feels like he was building up to more serious things.” 

Your eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. “What you do mean” you asked.

“Everything that I mentioned before,” Seunghan said. “He started off with things that would be considered just friendly. An upperclassmen taking care of someone younger. But then it started to get more personal with the presents. Eventually he was taking you on things many people would consider dates.” 

“Yeah, if my significant other took someone to the place they named as one of their dream dates,” Jaehyun said, “I’d be fucking livid.” 

“I think anyone would be,” Intak said from behind you. “Even if they weren’t the jealous or possessive type.”

“There’s definitely tension between you two,” Sunoo said, softly. He looked conflicted. Worried. “The way he looks at you? The way he talks to you? The way he treats you? It all just…” He sighed. “I don’t know if it would technically be him ‘leading you on’. But he does like you, Y/N. He really does. And we’ve all seen it.”

“If he wanted to add you to the relationship,” Intak said, resting his chin on top of your head, “that definitely wasn’t the right way to go about it. No matter what kind of intention he had or if he got caught up in feelings.” 

“He doesn’t want to add me,” you mumbled more to yourself than anyone else. 

“He’s mentioned that there was someone that one of them liked,” Sangwon said. “That they hadn’t met the rest of them yet. That’s you.”

“He also asked if you could ever see yourself in a poly relationship,” Jaehyun added. “You don’t just ask someone that without some type of intention.” 

Your shoulders slumped in defeat. You hated that the points they were making clicked. 

You liked Felix. A lot. To the point your heart hurt. 

Maybe he did like you back like you suspected. 

“The way his one boyfriend— whatever his name was— reacted today?” Seunghan inquired. “That just gives me more reason to question Felix’s intentions.” 

“I think it was more out a place of worry,” you said. “None of them could get ahold of Felix cause his phone died.” 

“Maybe at first it was,” Sunoo said. “But didn’t you say he really blew up after Felix said your name?” 

You nodded. 

“He obviously knew who you were,” Sunoo continued. “He accused Felix of cheating right after that and then didn’t let either of you explain what happened. And the way he talked to you? That wasn’t okay, Y/N. A reaction like that isn’t just from worry.” 

“He was insecure,” Intak confirmed. 

“He’s lucky I don’t go over there punch him,” Seunghan grumbled. 

“Violence is not the answer,” Sangwon deadpanned.

“I could care less,” Seunghan countered anger very present in his tone. He gestured his hands towards you. “Look at her. They did this.”

You reached up and wiped away your tears. Intak’s arms wrapped around you, pulling you flush against his chest. You leaned into him even more, trying to calm yourself. 

“What should I do?” You asked weakly.

“You need to talk to Felix,” Sangwon said. “Like seriously sit down and talk.” 

“You also need to talk to his boyfriends,” Sunoo said. 

“I really don’t want her going anywhere near them right now,” Seunghan said. 

“Not right now,” Sunoo said. “After she talks to Felix. Give them all time to calm down. Give Felix time to talk to them first and explain himself. But something needs to be put straight.” Sunoo’s eyes focused on you. “You’re not a fault here at all, Y/N. Seriously. None of this was your fault.” 

“I fell asleep,” you said. “If I hadn’t then Felix’s phone wouldn’t have died and—

“You’re a fourth year undergrad getting ready for midterms,” Jaehyun said cutting you off. “You’re stressed out and sleep deprived. Last night was probably the longest you’ve sleep all month and we all know it. I imagine Felix is probably in the same boat with his clinical rotations right now.” 

You began nibbling on your bottom lip but immediately got stopped by Intak with one firm look. 

“You didn’t deserve to be treated that way,” Sangwon said. “And they need to apologize for it. Or at least that one boyfriend does.” 

“And Felix,” Seunghan added. 

“I don’t think Felix is that kind of person though,” you mumbled. “He’s not bad. He’s…” 

He’s Felix.

“I don’t think he is either,” Sunoo said, sympathetic. “I do think he’s genuinely a good person. And he cares about you. He really does. But I think maybe he let his feelings for you take over and didn’t think things through. He didn’t think about the consequences. He was selfish with you.”

“But then what?” You asked. “After we talk? If they apologize and everything gets cleared up? Then what?” 

“I mean,” Intak started, “do you think you could see yourself in that type of relationship? Dating eight men?” 

You grimaced. “I don’t think so,” you said. “And even if I did it’s obvious they don’t want to add anyone.” 

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