#ericlovesabby

I had a long weekend with my mom in Chicago....like 5 days. Visiting my mom isn't easy but I need it, at the same time. My mom has dementia, she's thin, she's a fragment of what once was, she only had one decent day with me and the rest was silence. I miss my mom so much. I miss her strong personality, her uber kindness to everyone and anyone. She has a heart of gold. I know my mom is somewhere in this person, but she's locked in and that's just hard for anyone who knows my mom, to watch. Gosh, I miss my mom so much.

This is what I posted on Facebook.

Yesterday, I drove to Naperville from my mom’s house. It was a grey, rainy day. Traffic wasn’t bad but I couldn’t believe how long the drive was from A to B. FYI, this was my daily drive to work. I would leave my house at 5:15a to drop the kids off at my folk’s house, to grab the 7am train to downtown, walk a mile to work. I did this for years. I still remember getting home late to rake the leaves or shovel the snow. I have no idea how I did this.

I visited my brother’s grave. It’s almost 14.5 years that he’s been gone. I miss him, always.

I drove by my very first home (pictured). Lots of treasured memories created in this house.

Feeling incredibly thankful to spend time with my mom/ family.

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I got back to Oregon last night. When we landed, I looked at my Facebook and I saw where my kids posted that Mike, a lifetime friend was missing. We've known him since he was in elementary school, he's Tyler's best friend. He/Lauren (wife) and son spent a week at our home in Florida last year. We went to their wedding, etc.... anyway, he's been missing for the last 2 days and Lauren's going crazy, of course. Last night, they found him. He committed suicide. This breaks my heart... for his son, who's only 6/7, his wife, his family, my kids. This makes no sense at all. He was a good kid, great family, was an ER nurse, was well loved by everyone. Mental illness is a real thing but he never exhibited anything. He was just a kid, so much life ahead of him.

If anyone reads this - - please, call me, let me, call your loved ones. You are NOT alone, you are WANTED, you are LOVED. You mean everything to someone. You will be missed by so many.

Hug and love your family daily.

My first home and Manny's grave.

I spent part of today wrapping presents, thinking about who else I need to get, who I need to ship to, etc.  I’m forever thankful that Eric is always able and willing to step in to help out.

I noticed the other day that I really don’t post that many photos of Jans anymore.  I think it’s because he isn’t here so I can't take photos of him and, when he does come home, he isn’t here.  In the beginning, it was really hard to let him go, but he’s 20 and he’s living his own life in all ways.  He is growing up and working on becoming a man, so I do my best to stay on the sidelines and watch.  Of course, I counsel him ALL the time, and we talk a few times a day or text, but he does what he wants.

Today, he’s in Corvallis.  He left Saturday to hang out with his new roommates (he has an apartment with 2 kids), walk around campus, etc.  He has a job interview today (crossing fingers), then Hannah (girlfriend) is going to meet him and they are going to the Beaver store before walking around campus, again, before heading back.  Of course, he got tickets for the next football game (Saturday).

So, yes, I don’t post many photos of him.  It’s such an odd time in my life.  I’m super proud that he’s doing his thing, but I miss him.  I’ll always miss my son not living with us, but I’m also incredibly happy for him.

Forever grateful that Eric and I are best friends because, at the end, it’ll be just the two of us…. kids/grandkids will visit us but yes, we will be doing our own thing.  Hmmm…. I’m thinking a month in Hawaii, or 3.

So, I had a photo of me on this blog.  I had it up on Facebook for awhile, and in my instagram (still has it on instagram).  No big deal.  It was a photo that didn’t look like me, mostly, because I had on make-up, like, I was seriously made up. I thought it looked really cool.  Now, I do wear make-up, but not much.  

I did write a blog about the photo I had posted.  Basically, I went to the mall and let someone in the cosmetics section do my face.  She put loads of make-up on me and I loved it...it hid my freckles and it made me look different.  Anyway, I just talked to my dear husband, Eric. He is in Chile, working, and was reading my blog and basically had a heart attack when he saw my photo ... therefore, he practically begged me to take the photo down.  He really hates the photo (I knew this) because he says I don’t look like myself in it, blah, blah.  Well, I like the photo a lot but, after he starts telling me that I should rename that photo “darkness” or “reality check” (titles I’ve used on this blog), I decided to take it down.  Haha, what a dude :-).

Let me say this, Eric, since I know you’ll probably read this:  Be happy.  Be very happy.  Now that I know you hate this photo, I’ll make photos of it and stick it everywhere :-).

I looked at my cell phone and I put absolutely nothing on it regarding Venice... and that surprises me.  Why?  I absolutely loved Venice for a million reasons.  Let me start with the trip.

We left Vienna in the evening and took an overnight train to Venice.  Luckily, no mishaps this time.  We were given a first class overnight compartment and it was tiny, of course, but it was perfect.  When we got to our cabin, we each were given a basket with some snacks, fruits and a small bottle of sangria.  I was very thirsty so I opened it and I drank it like water.  Eric just stared at me, then cracked up.  What can I say?  I was thirsty.  Next, they gave us menus so we could select what we wanted to eat for breakfast, then we got ready to sleep for the night.  

Sleeping in these overnight cabins, for me, aren't exactly comfortable or easy.  The train is constantly moving, stopping, moving and, for me, who wakes up for anything, it was difficult.  I got up several times during the night.  Eric slept great :-).

We were up around 7A and the train was arriving around 8:30A into Venice. Wow, the view as you see yourself coming into the city is spectacular!  It's exactly what I imagined and so much more.  It's like stepping back in time into a town where you do not see cars, just boats.  There are no buses or taxis, just boats or gondolas.  Very cool.

Once we arrived into the city, I took out directions on how to get to our B&B.  This was the first B&B we were staying in and I was really looking forward to it.  We stayed at a B&B called B&B Santo Stefano @ Calle Crosera, Venezia. This is where it gets a little tricky.  The owner, Giorgio, emailed me specific directions on what bus to take, etc., to find the B&B.  So, we took the waterbus to later realize we were going the wrong way, so we had to turn around (it was 7 EUR each was is steep) or they give you the option of buying a one day pass for 20 EUR (steep).  Eventually, we arrive at our stop and start walking, following directions from the map that was given to me, trying to find this B&B.  This went on for awhile until, eventually, we found it.

Regarding the B&B?  There is nothing in the door that tells you it is a B&B.  It is an old apartment building, with loads of character.  We rang the bell and a lady came down and had us follow her upstairs (to the very top floor).  It was like 10A by that time and, despite emailing them and being assured our room would be ready by 9A, our apartment was not ready and they told us it would not be ready until 2P and we could not wait in the apartment.  I was exhausted and not happy... but we decided to make the best of it and they allowed us to leave our luggage in the apartment (thankfully) so we can walk and start discovering this beautiful city.

The streets are very narrow, cobblestone, very beautiful.  The smells are really nice and that surprised me since it is surrounded by water and I just assumed it would smell bad.  Eventually, Eric and I got hungry and we decided to stop and grab something to eat.  We found this deli like place near San Marco's square and it looked like a little dive.  Eric ordered his standard panini and I ordered this lasagna.  The lasagna didn't look great since they had to warm it up but I just wanted something heavy to tie me up for awhile.  So, the man brings our food and... I took a bite and, I swear, I think I melted.  It was, hands down, the best lasagna I've had in my life.  I think I had tears in my eyes (and I'm not a huge lasagna person).  Of course, Eric notices my glazed look and says, "it's that good?", and I said, "oh, yeah".  I offered Eric a bite and then his eyes got huge.  I ended up giving him more of my lasagna since he loved it so much.  Let me just say this ... after this, Eric ordered lasagna everywhere we went in Italy.

My first thoughts upon entering Vienna?  HUGE.  Beyond grand.  Rich. Beautiful.

For me, everything in Vienna was huge.  I don't think I saw one building that was "regular size".  Everything is just monstrous.  Let me give you an example, we used our GPS to get around town, etc.  Our GPS had problems because the buildings were so big, we had issues reaching the satellite, I think.  Seriously, buildings in Vienna are that big.

We walked everywhere.  We walked miles.  We went into various churches and buildings and I do remember going into the Spanish Riding School in Vienna, which is beautiful and grand.  It reminded me so much of Tarra and I know she would want to attend that school.  Lots of beautiful horses on display, costumes, etc.  Here is a link of a show taking place in the building:  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F_QlKdNrzAU (we didn't see this show).

Many of the buildings had canopies of flowers on them.  So beautiful.  Miles and miles of walking.  By the time we sat down to dinner, my feet were killing me but, in a bizarre way, I love the feeling.  It means we had a healthy walk (almost like a solid hike).  We walked around and found this random place for dinner and it was not good.  Like, really bad food.  I think this was the first time in Europe that we couldn't finish the food.  I had some seafood soup concoction and Eric had some nasty looking burrito.  Bad choice for us.  Food is expensive, too (Vienna is very expensive).

I know, I know.  I did too much in one day, but I really wanted Saturday to be somewhat open, so we could go to Wawel Castle, maybe shop, maybe go to Schindler's Factory.  I just wanted to do a lot on Friday, but, of course, I didn't realize that our Thursday night would be messed up, or that I'd be up for many hours on Friday before I touched a bed.  Oh well... Salt Mines.

I had read a review by Rick Steves so I really wanted to do the Salt Mines and I'm so glad we did (photos below).  From going to Auschwitz, which made me sad and emotionally, it was good we did the Salt Mines after it. Something to keep my mind occupied... if for a few hours.

What I didn't realize was how much walking we would do this day.  Auschwitz involves a lot of walking but you don't want to miss anything so you don't feel it until you sit down.  Salt Mines is a bit of a work out.

First, when you first look at the building, you think... oh, that's it?  Like, it looks like a little building, yet it is supposed to be the largest Salt Mine in Europe.  Well, looks can be deceiving.

We walked 812 steps down to reach level 1.  We walked 3 levels and the Salt Mine has 9 levels.  We saw 1% of the Salt Mine and it was a lot of walking.  We were told it would take 5 months to walk the entire mine.  It's absolutely beautiful.  They have made many salt sculptures (photos below) throughout the salt mine, including one with Pope John Paul.  I can't recommend it enough.

Krakow is a hot spot of action.  I saw hundreds of people walking around.  Night clubs, bars galore.  It really is a fun city and I regret not making an effort to stay a few days longer.  I just didn't know anything about the city.

Yes, we were really tired when we got back to our room, around 7:30P.  Eric laid down in bed and was OUT.  I eventually got him up and we went to the hotel restaurant, called Vanilla Sky, for dinner.  I had some amazing shrimp dish, Eric had some BBQ salmon ... with drinks and everything, it was USD 30.  As I said, Poland is inexpensive.

Yeah, I need to go shopping today :-)