#ep003

“Have you made a decision yet?” was the first thing Natalie heard at 7:10am on Monday morning. She’d stalled him for the weekend by complaining that she couldn’t think while having menstrual cramps. Satan knew enough about humans to know that she couldn’t use that excuse forever. He was getting impatient for the contract to end, and today he intended on bugging her, threatening her, whatever worked to get her to make up her mind. But Natalie was so...

“Dude... Urgh... I haven’t got time to think of your dumb contract today,” Natalie rolled in order that she’d fall on the floor, knowing it was the only way to get her body willingly out of bed, “it’s a school day and I have some homework to cram before I go,”

“I’m coming with you,” Satan informed,

“You...can’t?” Natalie, in theory, knew that the devil was going to do whatever he pleased but she severely hoped he had the decency not to go to a school. For a moment she wished she’d gone to college to do her A-levels, and had a fleeting thought of how the security team would act if a student were to walk in with the devil. She grabbed clothes from her closet and threw them to her bed, gesturing for Satan to turn around while she got changed.

“I can, and I will, I’m not leaving your side until you make up your mind about this contract. If you think I’m going to spend eternity answering to you, you’ve got another-“

“Answering to me?” Natalie paused amidst removing her pyjama top, Satan turned to see her eyes light up and realised that he had never explained this part of the deal. Damn, he should have guessed she wouldn’t have worked this one out.

“Never mind,” he tried to save himself, returning his glance away,

“Do you mean I’m in charge of you?” A cocky smirk spread across her face,

“I said, never mind,” fuck,

“How about if I order you to tell me what you meant?” Too late, she’d worked it out. Satan placed his hand over his face in mild despair, peering at the bookshelf through the gaps in his fingers.

“It’s not like you can tell me to do absolutely anything, girl. Don’t get the wrong impression. If you want something big you’re going to have to use the contract for that,” another fake sigh escaped him, “but until then, yes, you are-“ he bitterly raised his fingers into air quotes, “in charge”.

It hadn’t taken Natalie long to get dressed, she grabbed her back pack and sat at her desk, taking out her homework and a cereal bar.

“Couldn’t you have done that over the weekend?” Satan side-eyed her English homework and winced slightly in disdain. He selected a new book from her collection and reclined on her bed with it.

“I probably could have done, but you forget I was sort of dealing with an unwanted guest,” Natalie had learnt over the past few days that she could get away with a bit of cheeky rudeness towards him. She couldn’t really tell if he was offended by it, she imagined much worse things had happened to him than a bit of name-calling. Falling from heaven and apparently spending all the time after that being a miserable git. “Plus, you get better results from me under pressure,” she smiled smugly.

“You’re just lazy,”

“Well, better for you then, isn’t sloth a sin?”

For the next twenty minutes they sat in silence as Natalie finished her work and thought about whether she should really take Satan to school or not. On one hand, she could order him to stay here but she hadn’t left him alone all weekend and didn’t exactly trust him. He’d broken the spine on two of her books already; a gentle touch isn’t how you’d describe him. He was particularly good at asserting control and if she ordered him to ‘stay here’, she’d then had to add on ‘don’t break anything’, ‘don’t make any noise’, ‘don’t prank call anyone’. It just seemed like more effort than it was worth.

“See you later, sweet pea!” called her father from downstairs, leaving for work.

“Later, Dad,” Natalie called back, re-packing her bag ready for school and cramming the last bite of summer fruit Alpen into her mouth. Her father was very timely and always left the house at exactly the same time, so she could always rely on him to know when it was time for her to think about going to school.

“Okay, so you can come to school with me. But...” Natalie looked Satan up and down. The guy was basically the length of her bed, with curved horns, glowing eyes and large muscles all over his body. He wore a brown robe that left his top half fully exposed. And his old-fashioned Jesus sandals, as Natalie called them (of which Satan was less than impressed) completed the look of ‘super obviously not normal’. “Not to be ‘that guy’, but I can’t exactly go out in public with you.”

“You must!” He declared sardonically,

“Er...can’t you change your appearance, then?” Natalie said with slight worry, she really couldn’t imagine a way to keep him inconspicuous in this form. She added some teasing to her tone because she wondered if challenging him was likely to get a better result.

“What? You aren’t so keen having people thinking you’re a Satanist? Boring,” Satan teased, knowing full-well that of all the humans joyfully willing to be associated with him, Natalie was not one of them. He had seen the bible on her shelf and noted the crucifix she presented on her dresser (but, for some reason, never wore). She was not a follower.

Natalie exclaimed quietly through gritted teeth, “I’m not a Satanist! I was on my period!” Satan enjoyed the knowledge that he caught a nerve somewhere and laughed to himself. Natalie looked at her clock, running late again, “Look, I need to go to school. If you’re going outside, I need you to not be so obvious.”

There was an inexplicable charm about Natalie. She seemed simple, as all humans were. She was uneasy around him, but not fearful – this intrigued him. As much as Lucifer hated humans, he somehow felt that Natalie was much more fun to torment than to physically harm. Although the contract was only three days old (it definitely felt like much longer) and he could have gotten away with breaking a leg or two to get out of this situation. He couldn’t help but see her pathetic cluelessness as the opportunity for a slow burn; and even though she was only seventeen, he could see potential in having her around (plus, it would buy him time until his next move). Provided she continued to be low maintenance and overall co-operative (if a little snarky about it). He took another look at her and realised she really wasn’t going to let him go out looking like this. Her persistence could very quickly become an inconvenience.

“Is that an order?” He resigned,

“Kinda,” Natalie said (she’d never been ‘in charge’ before, it would take some getting used to). She was getting more and more anxious about the time.

“This is ridiculous. Obeying a little girl with menstrual rage...” he snapped his fingers and, as instantly as his original appearance, his look changed. Now, standing before Natalie, was what seemed to be a human being. She noted the disappearance of his horns and his pointed ears. And he was wearing clothes, thank goodness.

Lucifer didn’t dislike his ‘human’ look, he used it often enough, but he didn’t want Natalie to forget just how scary and evil he could be. He made a show of disliking the change hoping this conversation to be done with and they could go.

“Fucking hell! You look like a drug dealer greaser...” Natalie was, if anything, more disgusted by this look than the original one. There was no way she could bring him anywhere near a school.

“Good,” Satan replied, the association nothing less than a compliment to him.

“No, not good. I don’t hang out with drug dealers!”

“Well, this is all you’re getting,” Satan turned on his heel and went toward the door,

“You have to look younger and...decent!” Natalie followed as they begun down the stairs, zipping up her bag while it was hanging from her shoulder. Younger!! Did she know how old he was?! This was younger!

“I’m not going to demean myself for you. I said no, and that’s final.” Natalie jogged past him on the stairs and stood in front of the front door.

“I order you to be an adorable young teen,” Satan stopped on the bottom step and scowled at her,

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

“If you go like that, you’re not going to be allowed in the school. So change the look, lose the piercings. Uniform is blue shirt and grey trousers.” Satan was not happy.

Forget inconvenience, she was already becoming an irritation. But if Lucifer was a master of any ability, it was the ability to make the most of what he had, whether she was going to use this contract, break it or keep him around for longer – there were positives to all.

That is, if he could stand being around her for much longer.

“Smile!” she said to him, as they took to the street.