@ensnaredearl continue from here
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ Alois couldn’t help but let out a soft, almost mocking chuckle at his own nervous reflection. It was nostalgic to feel that way again; he remembered stumbling over his actions in the past. He gently cupped his reflection's cheek, his expression softening very so slightly. Finding comfort was a rare thing, especially when it didn't come from Claude – it felt quite awkward to seek solace in oneself, almost in a literal sense.
❛ Oh, for heaven’s sake, calm down! You’re acting like a pitiful child. You’re a Trancy, aren’t you? You merely helped the poor thing, nothing you did was wrong. An earl must embody perfection, don’t you agree? Claude reminds us we’re a feast for the taking, not some wretched soul—so why wallow in such ludicrous doubt? ❜
Innocence of his features, showing heavily pronounced fragility, always had been one of his most preferred distorstion of his self --- people seemed to taking advantage of someone else who looked vulnerable, and he had terrible flaw to exploring how much obscurity could be watched back when he was exposing himself inside such state, when he was lying inside every corner of his body, when all he was projecting was Illusions. There was another context in which this vulnerability could be perceived associated to honest feelings : an fragment of seconds, an heavier sadness within his expression … but those weren't supposed to be perceived or acknoweldged in whatever manner. Associated innocence, in front of an reflection, in which he was playing even with the notion to bring apologies. Where was last time he had been sorry to had generated wrong in some manner ? Where was last time he did apology sinceretly for had caused harm because of his actions ? Never ? If it's was something he wouldn't probably never do, regardless if other person was an king, was to bring pleasant comfort of apologies ! Though, initially, inside the way he expressed that sentence was hiding future mocking playfulness about how he had an absence of care about consequences reached that funny domain of vulnerability, there was no intention to correcting his initial intention. No, it would be funnier to live it that way.
You're acting like an pitiful child. Ah, what an wonderful compliment ! Yes, he needed to be saw as the most miserable, as the most hopeless --- he would enjoy every damn second when the darkness of an human soul would betray the other party, and would enjoy further every damn associated second in which he would giving them pain in return, humiliating them for be so damn blind, destroying them for their right-thinking mercy … That, and be called a brat were the most wonderful compliments ! Keeping himself inside his role, tears exposed themselves as he had been asked to calm down, expressing hurt over same sentence which resonated beautifully inside his mind. An fragile nod resonated, when he did his best for insisting over pressumed lack of confidence he had, all that self-consciousness concerning the weight of that name. ❝ You're really think so ? I know I'm pitiful, I'm doing my best for overcome that, but it's difficult … The world is so dangerous, so terrible … ❞ With himself, since he remained the nice type, all he could go was to reflecting literal state he had been before, and bring to his face broken illusions he didn't wanted to perceive. With himself, there will no plot twist when his expression will change, and he will mockingly laugh.
How much he would remain gentle over the reflections was something himself didn't anticipated though. An earl must embody perfection. Ah, he nodded at that, when he managed to exposing all sorrow he could inside an most fragile and innocent features, in which remnant of previous tears decided to leave his eyes. For the occassion, he will really embracing that sentence, right ? Recollection over Claude generated an mocking inner smile. He never perceived enough that demon for had remained that kind of comfort, hence cannot empathizing on intented reassurance his reflection was receiving however could resonate over 'feast for the talking'. What could be called an angelic happy smile was expressed, when he forced himself to remember this was his reflection. His next sentence had better to be expressed with the most fragility as possible. ❝ These darknesses that constantly embrace me, sometimes I suffocate in them rather than feeling confident. Sometimes when I remember all I've accomplished to be in my place, I have these lingering emotions of not giving honor to this cursed name … that consequences will come because of my actions, that I will cause harm without meaning to and that I will be rejected … ❞ In middle of an playful game, it remained truths used as entertaining weapons, but in the situation he was describing, he would never confess such confidences. It was only as a mirror, facing a reflection , that he could allow himself digressions of honesty.
