#enragedviking

too.. too many skj;lkafdk; okay, okay top 5 is:

- Spirited Away (the first ghibli movie i watched and i fell in loooooove ;o;)- The Secret World of Arrietty- Howl’s Moving Castle- Ponyo- Grave of the Fireflies (even tho it hurt me.. DON’T EVER TOUCH ME AGAIN)

Making this for those who are just getting in on the adventure, or those who want to go back and reread.

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It’s all too common that when someone dies tragically, the loved ones left behind are cursed with the nightmares of not being able to have done anything to stop it. The guilt is overwhelming, and sleep lost in the pit of night terrors eats away at the waking moments when all one can think of is how they’re now all alone. Even worse, is when the person to have died is the one person you felt had left in the world.

           Wanda sat on her bed weeping in the dark, as she had since every night she’d arrived at the Avenger’s facility, and blaming herself for not having done more. She should have protected him, she should have had him stay by her side so they’d be together like they always were, she should have-

           The door to her room opened, letting in the barest amount of light from the hall. Being back lit and the tears blurring her vision made it so Wanda couldn’t see who was opening the door. She hiccupped, and tried to wipe away her tears, but her sleeves were already soaked. She had never bothered to change out of her gear for the night.

           “You’ve been crying for the past four hours. Thought you could use some water.” Natasha said unapologetically, though she only had her head in the room and made no moves to come inside.

           Wanda made a small ‘o’ with her mouth, as she tried to calm down her erratic breathing. “Uhm, thank you. I think.” She mumbled the last part.

           With that, Natasha opened the door wide enough to slip though, the water bottle in her hand crinkling. The door clicked closed, and the room was again dimmed to only the faint light coming in from the window. Natasha’s foot falls are noiseless as she makes her way over to the bed. There was no chance of her tripping on anything left on the ground, Wanda’s room was as barren as the young avenger felt. The only reason there was even furniture in it was because Stark had pre-styled it for the new arrival. She stops just short of the bed, but extends her hand to offer Wanda the water bottle.

           Unsure of what else to do, Wanda takes the water with a mumbled ‘thank you’. She doesn’t open it, but rests it on her extended knees.

           “Might help if you drink from it.” Natasha said softly.

           Wanda nods, but still doesn’t make any moves to try and drink from the water bottle.

           With a sigh, Natasha sits on the edge of Wanda’s bed. Wanda shows no outward reaction, until the red-headed Russian’s arms reach out and pull her into a gentle hug. Wanda is startled, she had experienced no real physical contact since she the Vision had carried her out of the wreckage that become Sokovia, and the tenderness in the hug made her start to panic again. But Natasha made things as comfortable as she could for Wanda, gently rocking her, and rubbing a hand down the waves on Wanda’s head.

           “Cry all you want, I’ll hold you through it.” Natasha murmured into Wanda’s hair.

           At that, Wanda broke again, this time wailing along with her tears. It seemed so much easier to break down into another’s arms, like a flood gate had been released. When the sobs turned into gasping breaths, Natasha murmured words to calm her down, so that at least she could breathe to cry again later.

           Wanda’s gasps turned to whimpers as she buried her face in Natasha’s chest. “Does it ever get easier?”

           Natasha was silent for the moment. Wanda was tempted to look into the other woman’s mind when she spoke.

“No. It doesn’t. The pain is never any less, it never dulls, and it never goes away.” Natasha placed a hand under Wanda’s chin and made her look up into her eyes. “But you get stronger, every day you live with it, because that is what those who live must do. We keep going for those who never got the chance. Understand?” Her voice was stern, but Wanda found a comfort in it.

It made Natasha seem steady, like she knew what to do for all things, and if needed she’d let someone lean on her until they could stand on their own again. And Wanda could really use that right about now.

“You should really have some of that water now.”

Wanda nodded, reluctantly pulling away from the warmth of the hug, and grabbing the bottle. She could only bring herself to take a few miniscule sips.

Natasha reached up to touch a hand to touch Wanda’s face and gently rub the soft skin with her thumb. “Think you’ll be able to get some sleep tonight?”

Wanda did feel incredibly tired, but not the kind of tired that would let her sleep. “No.” She murmured.

Natasha adjusted her position at that, so that her legs lay next to Wanda’s. She put an arm up over Wanda’s shoulders and brought her into the crook of her neck to use her shoulder as a pillow. “Then will we rest for now.”

Wanda was again startled, but the thought of not being alone again for the night was a strange comfort. She let herself sink into the cradle of Natasha’s body, even if it was an uncomfortable potential sleeping position. Not really thinking about it, she lay a small kiss of thanks on Natasha’s neck.