#eitan writes

He’s really despicable honestly. Definitely tried to flirt with me, my wife, anything that moves really. He’s a braggart, perhaps even a narcissist in the clinical sense.

Today someone I don’t like was said to “smell too much like genocide”.

I balked immediately when I learned the joke. I know he’s insensitive, even cruel, in the way he talked about the war. Some of it was self centered, but some came from an old pain.

Today my wife laughed when her friend said that asshole “smelled too much like genocide”.

I told her the joke wasn’t funny. She disagreed. We see eye to eye on most things. Especially disliking this guy. He’s not a Republican but he’s hardly true blue either. Everything else he said was just so off color. Talking to a lesbian like she was beside him in a locker room. Like they viewed things the same.

Today I had to move on from that exchange with my wife after a Jew I despised was treated like a Jew worthy of the term.

He was foul, a moral odor, or so the joke implies. I think back to everything that’s ever been leveled at me. I thought about the left wing Jews shot at kibbutz Be’eri. I thought about the girl shot at Bondi. I thought about the diplomats shot in DC. I thought about the minyan shot down the road not all that long ago.

Who is not a Zionist when we die? Do children still smell like genocide- different than my enemies? When my jaw gets ripped by a bullet, what will be the most odious about my death? Where I died or that I can’t smile for them any longer?

Today my enemy was rotten, tomorrow I’ll spoil.

I want to pretend it ends at the bad ones.

But tomorrow comes the same.

There was no reason for Wriothesley to come to Palais Mermonia in person this often.

He very easily could continue his regular correspondence with Neuvillette from the comfort of his own office back at the fortress, rather than make the trip for his meetings with Neuvillette every month. He keeps trying to tell himself that these trips were got for himself: to breathe in fresh air and feel actual sunlight on a regular basis. Though partially true, he doesn’t want to pass up on the opportunity to see Silvanus semi-regularly again.

It was extremely selfish of him, after all he was the one to end their short-lived tryst while Silvanus was still interning at the Fortress of Meropide. Aside from their relationship being a theoretical nightmare for the Human Resources department, It was a horrible decision by both of them. Wriothesley had never let himself experience these affections before, finding it hard to trust anyone after everything he had been through. But he genuinely cared for Silvanus, more than anyone else in his life.

It scared him.

But despite his own emotional baggage, he finally wanted to find solace in another person. Even though the two of them had grown up in very different environments, there was too many similarities. His love grew out of the desire to protect her, to make sure she would find happiness and peace far sooner than he did. And he unfortunately knew that he could not bring Silvanus this. He had his responsibilities to the fortress and it would be too cruel to ask her to stay. She deserved so much better than a life underground.

So he left her go. He used the excuse that she had far too much potential to be stuck as a low-level official within Meropide and gave his reference to the Fontaine Research Institute on her behalf. He was sure she understood his true feelings on the matter and chose not to question him further.

He would would ensure her happiness, even at the cost of his own.

And Wriothesley was correct about Silvanus’ abilities. Hearing in passing about her accomplishments and eventual employment at Palais Mermonia.

But after seeing her again in person. He couldn’t stay way, he wanted to see her despite knowing it would only hurt himself more. Wriothesley knows she must have moved on at this point but couldn’t help but feel guilty trying to worm his way back into her life.

This was a bad idea, but he couldn’t stay away

When Wriothesley announces his leave for the next meeting, Sigewinne gives him a knowing glance with a small smile and wishes him luck.

On his walk through the streets of Fontaine, he thinks about how Neuvillette is starting to catch on. At the same time, Wriothesley senses a change in Neuvillette’s demeanor and suddenly realizes that the Iudex’s feelings may be similar to his. He feels a sharp pang of jealousy and protectiveness, mixed in with his own sadness but it quick passes after another realization: Neuvillette could give Silvanus the adoration and happiness she deserved and Wriothesley would make it happen.

“To what extent do I care about Israel? Why do I care about the actions, survival and goings on of a nation that I have no political sway over?”

And it’s something goyim seem all too ready to answer for me these days. It’s usually some flavor of:

- Well…. *INSERT ANTISEMITIC ZOG RANT* but in a #Nazi #1488 #MAGA way or

- Well… *INSERT ANTISEMITIC ZOG RANT* but in a #woke #anticolonialist #antizionist way or

But the reality of the situation is that Israel is what its anthem promises: Hatikvah… “The Hope”

“Tell me you’ve seen the news about Platner?”

My fingers are still but my feet lead me at an uncontrolled pace. Out the door, locked once, kiss the mezuzah. Like some sort of bad joke, my nose always touches it first.

I was going to the bank, I needed cash, but I needed something even more ephemeral from him.

Chat: Coffee Break

Hmm... I wonder if Café Lutece has any left over pastries, and a second cup of coffee wouldn’t hurt — Unless Monsieur Neuvillette somehow finds out...

Chat: Time Management

If other government officials managed their time better, things would actually get done as scheduled — and save me the headache later.

About Silvanus: Fontainian High-Society

To put it bluntly: I am not a fan of Fontainian High-Society. The rich and wealthy only exist to to flaunt their political power, while contributing nothing else of great value to Fontaine. And more often than not, their extravagant lifestyle only comes from the suffering of others.

About Silvanus: Illness

It’s not something I talk about publicly, but yes I was born fairly sickly — and still am. It’s a relatively unknown condition that even the best doctors cannot diagnosis properly so my only option is to try treating my symptoms as is, and hope it’s enough to keep myself functioning. The only visible side effect I tend to have is a mild skin rash that can flare up on occasion but unfortunately my late younger brother was not so lucky...

About the Vision

Ah. That. Too many things were happening at once and I may have forgotten its existence well into my recovery. Since I have an element to wield now, Wriothesley is trying once again to teach me to use a weapon — and even roped the Champion Duelist into his scheme.

Something to Share: Light Novels

Fiction novels have always been popular in Fontaine and I’ve written my fair share of self-indulgent stories for myself, I even had the opportunity to travel to Inazuma for a Light Novel convention awhile back. But I never expected to get a publishing deal myself! I am only an ordinary person but constantly find myself interacting with legendary beings from around Teyvat, it makes for great writing material. I hope none of them find out what pen name I use...

Interesting Things: Curious Critters