#egostate

Egostate Disorder is very similar to OSDD-1b, but not exactly the same? I've had many system friends suggest I was a system but my tests came back negative. It's sort of an in-between of being a singlet and being a system?????

As OSDD-1b does vary a lot, I'm going off the blanket symptoms and diagnostic criteria from the DSM-IV.

Cutting the post up so it doesn't take over the whole screen!!

In some households mealtimes take priorities over all daily activities. Some households do it for the many benefits, which include having a healthy family. Reasons such as these are more specific to countries such as the UK and America as family relations seem less common/important here. An example for healthy eating at mealtimes includes a study done in 2007, families who ate dinner together every day consumed an average of 0.8 more servings of fruits and vegetables compared to families who didn’t eat dinner together as a family (Rockett, 2007). [1] I have sourced this from an American website which references/reflects studies done by Florida state university, this supports my previous point which is that the dietary importance of family mealtimes is common and advertised more strongly in America than the importance of family communication at mealtimes.

I have found another resource at www.familymeals.com, this website also supports the points I have found at my previous source however this one also states the extra benefits. These benefits include things such as less tension or stress between the family, better achievement as well as fewer behavior problems.  This shows that by recognizing the importance of these family mealtimes and by applying them and including them in our daily routines that it can actually improve family relations and other important and helpful benefits. This may encourage parents to have family mealtimes. This can relate to the Johari window as parents of children with bad behaviour may be trying to improve it as they see that the child has bad behaviour, whereas the child doesn’t and this is a subtle way to try and improve it. As well as these seemingly fantastic benefits many first world countries have family mealtimes for nothing more than traditional reasons, such as how they had when the parents were children and to just discuss how everybody’s day has been and to communicate with others and come together as a family.

Seemingly, family mealtimes are more important in third and second world countries. It can be argued that this is because things such as technology cannot get in the way or distract as it is less common compared to in first world countries. It can also be argued that these families are more likely to spend family mealtimes together as they are more grateful for what they have. Also in countries such as India their culture causes and encourages families to be large and very close knit. This is supported by their religious belief. An example of the importance of Indian mealtimes was illustrated in an English soap called Coronation Street which showed all the family sat around the dining table eating traditional and cultural Indian food and the importance of all the family being there was very stressed by the mother of the family.  Perhaps she shows a relation between the parenting ego state, which can be somewhat applied in the mothers position as she is trying to control the family by stressing that they must have family mealtimes and the importance of them.

Personally, as I grew up, I believe that my parents encouraged family mealtimes to help my understanding of acting differently in certain situations.  Such as when we had family mealtimes at the table I was encouraged to have a certain amount of table etiquette such as closing my mouth when eating, using cutely, waiting for everybody to start and asking to be excused from the table. Because of doing/ learning this as a child I now also carry a certain amount of table etiquette with me.  I believe that the information I found in source 2 also influenced me, as my family is quite relaxed and unstressed.

However, i have found an article on the daily mail online which states; 'Many children are left to eat alone in front of the TV, with only 20 per cent of families eating together at least once a week', this figure staggers me as i feel as that through the use of other sources I found a lot of information which led towards the importance of family mealtimes however this information and percentage is trying to suede me the other way. 

Refrences include:

http://edis.ifas.ufl.edu/fy1195

www.familymeals.com

Apa sih yang dimaksud dengan egostate? Egostate merupakan istilah dalam bidang psikologi yang menyatakan kondisi emosi seseorang. Kita pasti pernah bertemu orang yang sepanjang hari suka bercanda, atau sepanjang hari hanya serius melulu atau bahkan sepanjang hari kerjanya hanya menggerutu dan mengkritik keadaan. Egostate pada dasarnya berubah-ubah sesuai penempatan diri kita. orang yang bijak mampu memposisikan egostate nya dalam kondisi yang seharusnya. Yuk kita bahas macam-macam egostate

1.      Critical Parent (CP). Egostate ini adalah kondisi dimana seseorang senang mengkritik orang lain, misal “Kerjaan kamu kurang rapi!”, “Masa kerja kayak gini aja gak becus!” egostate ini agak kurang baik sehingga egostate CP ini perlu dikurangi dan dihindari untuk ditampilkan

2.      Nurturing Parent (NP). Egostate ini menggambarkan orang yang senang memuji orang lain, misal “Wah bagus sekali gambar kamu” atau “Suara kamu indah ya ternyata”. Egostate ini cukup baik untuk sering ditampilkan

3.      Adult (A). egostate yang satu ini identik dengan keseriusan dan biasanya apa yang disampaikan didukung oleh fakta-fakta. Misal “Menurut pengalaman saya, sistem ini kurang baik untuk diterapkan” atau “berdasarkan data yang saya punya, analisis kita sebaiknya seperti ini”. Egostate ini cukup baik, namun kita harus pintar-pintar menempatkan diri, jangan sampai orang lain sedang bercanda, kita malah tetap serius

4.      Rebelious Child (RC). Seperti namanya, RC ini adalah egostate yang pemberontak, tidak suka mendengarkan orang lain. Misal “Saya tidak mau mengerjakan ini lagi, titik!!”. RC ini perlu dikurangi dan dihindari

5.      Compliant Child (CC).. CC ini sekilas tampak penurut dan mau disuruh-suruh, namun dibaliknya, biasanya dia suka menggerutu dan mengeluh. Misal “ah dia mah bisanya nyuruh nyuruh orang doing, ujung-ujungnya saya lagi yang harus mengerjakan”. Egostate ini pun perlu dikurangi karena cenderung mengalah dan mengeluh

6.      Natural Child (NC). Egostate yang satu ini identik dengan keceriaan, candaan, kegirangan layaknya anak kecil. Misal “wah saya bersemangat nih menjalankan ini semua” atau “asyik, kerjaan ini saya paling suka”. Egostate yang satu ini cukup baik tetapi seperti Adult, perlu penyesuaian dan penempatan. Jangan sampai pada saat kita sedang serius rapat, kita malah bercanda-canda

Biasanya ke-6 egostate ini ada dalam diri setiap orang, tinggal bagaimana seseorang mengatur penempatan diri nya. Egostate yang cukup ideal berkisar di NP, A dan NC. Semakin dewasa dan semakin bijak seseorang, biasanya dia akan semakin bisa untuk mengatur dan mengendalikan egostatenya