#edenyaps

Started writing radiodust porn. There are now 8 chapters of content and genuine rising tension/plot.

a/n: toge is my absolute fav! i hope you enjoy <3 likes + reblogs are appreciated!

𝐛𝐟!𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞 𝐇𝐂𝐬

bf!toge, who would make you paper stars and origami any chance he got.

bf!toge, who prefers to always be touching you in some way. reading? expect him draped across your lap. washing dishes? he's wrapping his arms around you and laying his head on your shoulder. going out? his pinky is interlocked with yours the entire time.

bf!toge, who gets insecure that he can't speak normally, so he writes you page after page of love notes expressing his feelings.

bf!toge, who may or may not have a bit of a jealous streak.

bf!toge, who always kicks your ass at imessage games.

bf!toge, who memorized your order at the café you met at the first time you went out.

bf!toge, who sometimes uses his cursed speech to fuck with you.

"Toge, for the last time if you don't stop leaving your socks outside of the laundry basket i'm going to hurt you."

↳ "Kiss me." >:)

bf!toge, who gets genuinely upset if you start watching your show without him.

bf!toge, who is a serious gamer - also using his cursed speech on shitty teammates or opponents.

bf!toge, who shows up with flowers after you've had a bad day, face apologetic as he embraces you gently.

bf!toge, who is up to date on twitter lingo + regularly makes kys jokes.

bf!toge, who calls you his angel.

bf!toge, who is an ass man.

bf!toge who's hands went numb with anxiety the first time you went out with him.

bf!toge, who doesn't speak much, but he does to tell you he loves you.

bf!toge, who would go through the shibuya incident over and over again if it meant keeping you safe.

bf!toge, who loves squishing your face in his hands or against his own face.

bf!toge, who loves showing you his entire tiktok for you page (it's become a nightly routine).

bf!toge, who kisses your forehead and carries you to bed when you fall asleep on the couch watching a movie with him.

Alastor is this complicated tangle of aceness and trauma where he won't let anyone close because he's so afraid they'll ask for more. He can decline, but the betrayal of being misunderstood burns in the the whole life of being put down and dehumanized kind of way. Alastor, at the start of this fic, lives in a world of force and violence. To him, sex is another aspect of this violence and he refuses to welcome it. What this does instead is make him push to the brink of destruction and then accept any damages as inevitable. He doesn't want to know about consent because then it's a thing that can be taken from him.

Meanwhile, Angel Dust is ABSOLUTELY aware of why consent matters and how coercive people can be. Alastor is trying his fucking hardest to get into Situations and all Angel can think of is how he used to let Val do whatever he wanted out of eagerness to please. It strikes this horrible I feel like I'm fucking you up forever chord in his soul.

So we get the push and pull where Alastor can't taunt or tempt Angel into anything. He doesn't know what he wants, so he wants Angel to hurt him for real and fix it. When Angel refuses, it rocks his whole fucking worldview.

Alastor is limerent and it's his own fault for not forming any trust with anyone ever. He's touchstarved and addicted to being turned down when he offers more than he can give. It's the opposite of how he's been treated his whole life.

Anyway here's fic excerpts from the middle chapter that I chose to write first. Poor deer...

Chapter 8