#earnwat

the way she speaks of herself in third person, just like tine and probably just like sarawat once upon a time. this is her best friend, and yet she bares her soul to him in this still guarded way and hopes he sees her. hopes he can see the lifelong repressed feelings she felt bloom in her chest every time she looked at a girl she liked just a little bit more than a friend. hopes he can see how guilty she feels about not being able to be open. hopes he can see how scared she is, still, speaking about this hypothetically and not telling him the truth. the truth being—earn likes girls. likes the way their hair flows in the wind, likes the way their voices lilt like the beginnings of moonlight on a warm summer night. likes the way their hands fit right into hers. and still.

but her best friend comes through. it’s not about courage. it’s about the love. earn has watched him fall deeply in love with another boy. she’s seen how sarawat and tine look at each other in public, perhaps not touching, but their love for each other burning and apparent. she’s seen how sarawat laughs more nowadays, his mouth curled into a grin more often than not. she’s seen him hold tine’s doll close to his chest every night, murmuring a prayer for him to be safe.

earn doesn’t need to be brave. not when she slowly, slowly comes to the conclusion that she’s allowed to like girls. not when she decides to take the intiative and ask pear if she’d like to hang out more. not when long days turn into long nights and pear’s smile outshines the moonlight. not when she braids flowers into her hair and plays her songs. not when she presses breathy kisses to her mouth. not when she hears pear refer to her as her girlfriend and grin so hard that sarawat teases her for it. not when slowly, the same love reflects in her eyes whenever she looks at her in public. not when she introduces pear to her parents, not when she holds her hand on the streets, not when she bounds into her for a hug and a kiss, exhilarated, after winning another contest with ctrl+s. earn doesn’t have to be brave.

• sarawat finding out mil is dating phukong and going all protective and immediately letting go when phukong goes ‘🥺 i love you p’wat’ (earn is laughing her ass off in the background. sarawat and mil have a friendly argument later.)

• occupying various stances on the ‘is p’dim good actually’ argument. sarawat is pro p’dim (when he’s not stealing his phone and letting him talk to his boyfriend actually), earn just wants to play her guitar, and mil is staunchly anti p’dim and will roll his eyes after everything he says and slam doors into him

• mil draws little pictures of sarawat and earn to keep in his wallet. when sarawat finds out about it, he laughs at him and tells him to tune his damn guitar.

• gushing about their significant others to one another. earn will just sit on the floor and talk about how wonderful pear is, sarawat will ramble on about how kind and sweet tine is, and mil mentions phukong to rile wat up every once in a while. it works very well and ends in pillow fights every time.

• sarawat and mil get into almost-fistfights every other week because they’re both just so damn similar and stubborn. they work this off on the football field, and it’s always an ordeal to see whose team man and boss are on this time (they’re a package deal!). earn plays referee and calls a tie every time because she thinks it’s funny.

• both sarawat and mil learn how to braid earn’s hair during late night jam sessions and do it whenever they’re stressed and need something to work with. earn’s had every type of hair style in varying degrees of skill applied to her and at this point she just shrugs whenever it happens.