#dsjflg

Ice cream. Cookies. Milk. Chips. Chocolate bars.

All things that you shove into your basket as you walk around the convenient store with a scowl on your face, biting your lip so you don’t scream and cause everyone around you to think you’re crazy. You’re just getting everything you think you want, to treat yourself after feeling so... so... much!

You feel your heart speed up just thinking about it and you squeeze the handles of the basket hard enough that it starts to bend.

Ugh, I just wanna go HOME, you cry in your head as you wait in line.

You’re just stopping yourself from tapping your foot restlessly when your eyes spot a surprise near the registers.

Candy cigarettes?

...

Oh what the hell.

You throw them into the basket too. You’ve never tried it, but it looks like something fun to show at home and surprise the guys.

You put up a pleasant face for the cashier (no need to make a retailer’s job even more miserable) and happily decline the plastic bag. One good thing that happened today: you remembered your reusable bag!

It’s certainly something? To cool your temper.

You walk out and you’re back to walking fast to get home as fast as possible, almost checking shoulders with people when you think the ones in front of you are walking too slow for your current mood. You see your home in the distance, thank god, and make a little sprint towards it, half-hoping a little bit of TLC once you’re there.

You peek in the window as you go to the door, and though you don’t see anyone, you shrug and attempt to bowl over the door, only to curse up a storm when you find that it’s locked, of course. After more hissing and quiet yelling at the handle that dare get in the way your angry relaxation time at home, you shuffle your keys out, haphazardly unlock the door and slip inside- slamming the door just a little harder than you should’ve and march towards the sofa.

(After throwing your jacket, your shoes and socks, and your whole bag on the floor next to the door.)

“(y/n)...?” You hear Snow’s voice from the kitchen as you throw yourself into the cushions, bouncing a bit while the contents of your bags jumped with you.

“Hey Snow,” You say while you make a “pbbbff...” noise with your lips, turning on the TV to look for... you don’t know what, just something to take your mind off things.

Just his voice cools your chest.

You take out the bag of chips and rip it clumsily, with some of the chips tumbling out of it and onto the floor. You make another exasperated noise but make no move to clean up the mess, instead choosing to shove a mouthful of chips into your mouth.

(To be honest, you’re not even properly eating the chips. Just... biting it harder than you needed to, making more of an angry mess on your crinkled shirt.)

Maybe you’re doing it to get attention, you don’t know. You just feel so “aaeghegshrg”.

Thankfully, you didn’t have to make even more of a fool out of yourself, and you see a shadow fall over you from behind.

You sigh when your frustrations simmer down at just the idea of him being there for you... you really weren’t the kind to hold onto anger for too long.

“is... something the matter...?” Snow’s gentle voice comes from behind you, soothing you even more.

You make another sigh, but you look up to him with tired eyes. “Yeah. But it’s hard to say... I’m just not in a good mood... sorry.” You apologize bashfully, feeling silly when you see the mess you’ve made. You hear Snow chuckle, his deep voice shaking your core, making you want to drown in it. The big skeleton rounds the sofa and sits beside you (where the bag isn’t), and his weight pulls you a bit towards him.

“don’t be sorry.” He smiles at you, his sockets crinkled. “is there... anything i can do...?”

Feeling his warmth right there, you start leaning into his chest. “You’re already doing plenty. Just having you here makes me sleepy.” You titter. “Uh. Not in the bad way, I just... I feel relaxed already. I think I’m just tired, I don’t wanna feel... I dunno, spiky?”

“isn’t that red’s thing?”

The new voice surprises you enough to blink your eyes open (you really were starting to doze off on Snow’s chest) and sit up. You look to the darkened hallway (as the sun was setting and the lights haven’t been turned on yet), and see a pair of white lights, until you see the blue-clad skeleton that emerges out of the shadows. It’d be a good horror movie scene if he didn’t look so.... like Sans. Relaxed grin, lazy sockets, slouching a bit, pink slippers shuffling against the floor.

“hey...” Sans starts, his eyelights darting to the chips on the floor. “my little shoulder-chip. what’s wrong?”

“she said she feels... spiky,” Snow repeats as you nibble on a big chip, letting his knuckles ghost your cheek. You don’t say a thing, so he keeps on going.

“mind if i make some space?” Sans points to the bag and you make a little nod, and Sans moves it to the coffee table and sits beside you.

“I dunno... i’ve just been feeling like... this,” You say emphatically, pointing to the chip in your hand. “I feel... like a potato. Just... I dunno... stuck? I don’t know, I just feel,” you make vague, aggressive hand gestures in the air, and slump back down. “Like that,”

Sans takes a breath to say something, but you’re all suddenly aware of the sound of a... clang?? Somewhere outside the house, a door being thrown open.... the heavy steps of feet as someone’s running towards you-

“ilikepotatoes.” Red’s voice suddenly breaks into the room, as all three of you turn your heads around to where he is in the hallway, panting and sweating a bit, his grin a bit too wide with his eyelights dilated in his sockets. He’s sweating.

“Red... how,” You breathe, “Did you even hear that?? Also why did you run here?”

“... dramatic effect?” Red shrugs as he saunters easily to the sofa. “anyways, what i’m saying is,” He says as he folds his arm on the back of the sofa behind you, “i like potatoes. in fact i jus’ love to eat ‘em.”

He bounces his brows at you. “what i’m sayin’ is, if yer a potato, i’d love to-”

“oh my god shut up red,” Sans covers his face with both of his hands, apparently blue in the face from embarassment.

“ey i’m tryna make the girl blush what’re ya-?”

“that’s so stupid i’m getting second hand embarrassment,”

“oh fuck you.”

The exchange gets a giggle out of you, and all three skeletons get a spark in their eyelights.

“Ok, so I’ve been feeling pretty... ehhh today, but this is turning things around,” You smile, looking at the dumbasses while you lean on Snow.

“that’s good to know,”

“i aim t’ please, sweetheart.”

Snow sits up a bit more, bringing you with him, and points to the plastic bag on the table. “so... what’s all that?”

“Oh,” you blush a little, feeling a bit embarrassed for all the things you’ve bought. “It was... an impulse thing. i wasn’t feeling so great, so I wanted to buy everything I wanted to eat. There’s ice cream, candy, chips, just... a bunch of snacks. Oh, I also found candy cigarettes in the store,”

“what,” Red immediately sounds behind you, his smug expression now just a baffled huh???

“the fuck’s candy cigarettes? d’ya... smoke candy ‘r some shit?” Red asks incredulously, prompting a hearty laugh from you. “aw c’mon doll i gotta know!”

“Well,” you start to explain-

“humans’re weird.” Sans says plainly, fishing out said snack from the bag.

He gives it a shake, and you see Red’s eyelights dilate at the sound.

“I mean, don’t pretend like monsters aren’t,” you say as you take the box out of Sans’ hands, “this aren’t like actual cigarettes, Red. They’re just candies that look like cigarettes, so when you put them in your mouth to eat it it looks like you’ve got a cigarette in your mouth. They also have powders inside of them you can inhale and exhale so it looks like smoke... I read kids used to love them exactly for that reason? i don’t know what they taste like,”

You took one more look at the packing and tilt your head. “Oh... it’s chocolate cigarettes, so this one’s just... milk chocolate in the shape of a cigarette,”

“c’mon open ‘em, i’ve never seen ya with a cig darlin’,” Red chuckles, a playful expression on his skull.

You take out the old-timey box and open it. Inside as about 12 “cigarettes” all wrapped in paper. The chocolate sticking out of the ends does make it look like a cigarette. You pull it out and look at the three skeletons, expectations on their faces...

And you stick it into your mouth, moving away from Snow to sit back on the couch and put on your most stereotypical “criminal look” as you put your arms on the back of the couch and fold your leg over the other.

...

“Ey...” you say with a hint of confusion, taking out the chocolate to blow nothing into the air.

“HAH-” Red barks out behind you, slapping his teeth with his bony hand with a clack, doubling over behind the sofa while his shoulders bounced erratically, wheezing as he tries to hold in his laugh.

His absolute giddiness at seeing you with a “cigarette” in your mouth only makes the rest of you giggle and chortle, unrestrained, and the cigarette almost pokes into your throat when you accidentally breathed the whole stick into your mouth.

“Pweh-” You spit out the cigarette (it still had the paper on!) and laugh when you see Red, still unable to pull himself together as he looks like he’s actually struggling to breathe. “It wasn’t that funny!” You tell him, but your own chest is shaking when you see how Red looks like he’s dying.

“i... ha, i don’t fuck’n know!” Red unfolds himself and puts a hand on his chest as he tries to control himself. “i didn’t expect ya t’ say ‘ey...’ heheh... hehahah!”

You unwrap the chocolate from its papery confines and pop it in your mouth, biting it in two so you could chew on it. You take deep breaths before you swallow to make sure you don’t choke on it.

“gimme one of those,” Red reaches over you and takes a cigarette, propping it in between his teeth. He then proceeds to take a few steps back, leaning against the wall. He closes his sockets as he takes a “hit” and makes... the weirdest shape with his mouth (like he was trying to close his ‘lips’ while he was trying to withhold a smile) and makes a pout to exaggerate him “blowing smoke out”. He then keeps that weird mouth shape as he lids his sockets (one was lower than the other what the fuck,) and you watch the edges of his grin bend upwards.

“eyyyYYyyYy.” Red says, mimicking you.

You practically end up crying from how stupid everything is (why are you even laughing? It’s not supposed to be funny!) and the four of you end up on the couch poking fun at each other while eating all the snacks you’ve bought, until eventually Snow stands up to make a real meal for the lot of you.