#drckp

As the semester comes to a close, I have a lot to look back on.  Taking 15 credits was pretty relaxed for me, but I still struggled with other things: bad roommates, finding an internship, being in a sorority that had skew values, etc. But I always had one class to look forward to: Knowledge and Power.

This class, when I first registered, was intimidating, I admit.  I had taken one class before on Women in Gender Studies, and the professor had us read dozens of pages for each class, along with groups sitting in the front of the classroom “dictating” each lecture.  It was terrifying, due to my rough patch of anxiety at the time, but I managed to get through it.

From the moment I stepped into class, though, I knew it would be different.  Just the atmosphere in the classroom was enough to settle my apprehension and calm me down.  One by one, girls started to drizzle in and take their seats.  Over the course, I learned a lot about myself. Sometimes I tend to say “micro-aggressions,” and that could potentially really hurt someone, even if they don’t say it.  I learned a lot about being transgender, whereas before I had only minimal knowledge.  I learned about the tiniest biases that even technology has planted into our minds as “normal”, like fake pockets and one-size-fits-all aprons (that do NOT cover most chests, may I add). 

I came to look forward to every class, eager to learn new things.  This has been a class where I can truly be myself, even if I don’t say much. But I think that overall, I have learned so much more than in any other class, and I know that this knowledge will truly help me become a better person, and help those around me become more aware of the gender issues around them, as well.

Rabbi Esther Reed, Dr. Traci West, and Dr. Sandy Jones all spoke about Judaism, Christianity, and Islam and how their positions in their respective religions has affected them - not only as women, but also as women in power and religion.  

While I am not active in religion, I was raised Roman Catholic - went to church every Sunday with my family, said Grace, nightly prayers, attended CCD classes every week and made all of the sacraments up until Confirmation. A large portion of why I don’t attend church often anymore is because I’m in college, and I didn’t really enjoy going to mass every Sunday: sitting in a pew surrounded by people listening to someone talk about things that happened thousands of years ago never really interested me. But, since I was basically forced by my parents to go, I went with them and sat through it, trying not to fall asleep in the process.  Another reason why I am not really into believing in a higher power anymore is because I’ve gone through bouts of severe depression and anxiety - and often found myself asking “If God is supposed to make sure His people are safe and healthy, why am I feeling this way? Why me? What did I do to make Him think I deserved this?”  Straying from the religious community has been liberating for me - I don’t have to believe there is a higher power that can condemn me to Heaven or Hell, and I don’t have to rely on faith when something goes wrong - I CREATE my own luck, my own accomplishments, and when something good happens to me, I just call it being in the right place at the right time.