#dracoaries

thank you thank you thank you!!! enjoy :)

Wade was being an ass. That was really the only way to describe his behavior. He was being a total ass. 

“Wade, I swear to god, if you poke me one more time, I’m throwing you out the window.”

“But I’m bored.” Wade huffed, flopping over Peter’s couch rather dramatically, ending up with his feet by Peter’s head.

Peter sighed and shoved Wade’s feet away from his head. “Well, I have homework, so you can either deal with it or find entertainment outside of my apartment.”

Wade huffed again and started kicking his feet back and forth. He’d been here for about an hour now, even though Peter had told him a million times that he couldn’t really hang out tonight. So instead of being a normal person and not coming over, Wade had decided to just come over anyway and be annoying. 

“Ya know, you should just drop out of school.” Wade mused, poking Peter in the knee. Again.

“Once again, I kind of need to stay in school to have any form of a future.”

Wade seemed to consider that for a moment, then shook his head. “Nah, not worth it. Just drop out and be a stripper.”

Peter snorted. “I will when you will.”

Wade gasped and sat up. “Really?”

“No.” Peter snapped, making Wade groan and return to his upside-down position. 

There was a beat of silence, and Peter quickly thanked all the gods he knew of for it and started working on his homework again. He got maybe two problems done before Wade poked him again.

Peter bit his lip to keep from snapping at Wade and tried to keep working. Maybe, just this one time, if he ignored the problem, it would go away. It actually had worked once, but that was only because Wade had managed to get himself stuck in Peter’s shower curtain.

This time, of course, ignoring him didn’t work. Wade waited about three seconds, staring at Peter the whole time, then poked him again. 

This happened twelve times before Peter finally snapped and poked Wade hard back, though the only thing he could easily reach was Wade’s belly.  “Will you cut it out?”

Then, something rather unexpected happened. Instead of making a noise of pain or something of the sort, Wade giggled. 

They both froze, Peter with one hand still pointing at Wade’s torso. Neither of them moved for nearly ten seconds, which had to be a record for Wade.

Peter ended up being the one who broke the silence. “Um, Wade?”

“Yeah?” Wade responded, failing at sounding casual.

“Are you ticklish?” Peter asked slowly.

Wade struggled for words for a moment. “I–well–no.” he finally settled. “Definitely not. I am not ticklish.”

Peter raised an eyebrow. “Oh really?” he grinned, putting down his textbook and stretching both hands out to prove his point.

Wade immediately scrambled out of his reach, falling down from the couch. “Don’t you dare!” he shouted from the floor.

Peter gave Wade the happiest expression his face could possibly make. “Oh my god, you are!”

“No!” Wade insisted, getting to his feet and stepping away. Peter stood up and started to try and close the distance. “You stop that!” Wade ordered, stepping further back.

Peter grinned. Wade was about to be so screwed. “You know what this is the perfect opportunity for?”

“Forgetting the night ever happened?” Wade tried.

Peter shook his head, giving Wade an evil grin. “I was thinking something more along the lines of–”

“Don’t say it don’t say it don’t say it–”

“–revenge.” Peter finished, then lunged at him.

Family Matters (series) by TheRealLadyLoki

A Match of My Own    by    beetle

Sow the Wind   by Birdie (Robin_Mask)     

Miracles (series) by  VyxenSkye            

Nightmares  by  TheRealLadyLoki       

Till You’re Seventy by saruma_aki

Meeting May by ClockworkNight  

Symbolon  by tearsandfears  

Birthday  by  impalaloompa

You Give Love A Bad Name by WalesAPH

Well  by  Lafaiette  

Love in Red  by   Slackersunite

Flawed  by DarkSecrets3

Sunday Dinner at May’s by beetle

And with Ellie : 

Family bonding by TheBlazeCal    

Aunt May to the Rescue by  AnimeLoveLover123  

How Wonderful Life Is (Now You’re In The World)  by  marvelousshipper  

Spider-dad and Dadpool by Spideypoolhell               

(I love this! tysm)

Peter stared at the contents box and briefly considered setting it on fire. The first box–a Spider-man plushie–was funny. And honestly, he had been a little bit drunk a couple days before, so who knows, maybe he did order it.

He did not, however, order the Spider-man web-shooters for kids, the Spider-man poster, or any of the other seven things that had been sent to his doorstep.

He sure as fuck did not order a Spider-man thong. 

Which means, of course, that someone else has been ordering these things for him. The only problem is, he doesn’t know who, and he doesn’t know why. It could be MJ, though she usually doesn’t take things this far, and she’s been out of town for the last week and probably didn’t have time to order him his own memorabilia. It could be Tony, but honestly, it was more of a Tony thing to order them all for himself and then just start decorating with them.

He had done that, once, to Steve. It looked like America had puked on the Tower.

Unfortunately for Peter, that didn’t leave many options for culprits. He didn’t know many of the other Avengers very well, or at least not well enough for this. 

He glared at the stupid enigma thong for another minute before he turned away and went back to his bedroom to get ready for work. He quickly got dressed and was in the middle of brushing his teeth when his phone buzzed from his bed. He picked it up and just hoped it wasn’t Jameson.

It wasn’t. It was Wade, asking if Peter wanted to patrol with him tonight. Peter looked at the text and suddenly something clicked. 

Of course Wade Wilson would send me a Spider-man thong. WHO ELSE WOULD IT BE?

Peter really, really wished he could punch someone through the phone. Using his full force. He decided to settle for yelling at Wade and called him, rinsing out his mouth as it dialed.

“Is this my favorite Spidey calling?” Wade answered, then gasped. “Is this a booty call?!”

“Wade, I know it’s you who’s been sending me stupid Spider-man shit. Stop it.”

Wade paused. Wade Wilson paused. “What?” he asked, and Peter could feel his confusion in his tone.

If he was lying, he was good at it. “All the stuff? The plushie, the blanket, the web-shooters…the thing that came this morning?” Peter asked, lowering his voice at the end.

“I don’t think that was me, but now I really wanna know what came in this morning. Is it a dirty thing?”

Peter sighed and rubbed his hand over his face. “It’s a Spider-man thong. Who else would have sent it to me?”

Wade squealed. “Can I maybe…have it?”

“Not a chance in hell. This is serious, Wade, there’s only like four people who know both my address and my alter ego.”

Wade hummed. He sounded distracted. “Uh huh, right.”

“Wade. Focus.”

Wade paused again. This was getting concerning. “Uh, Petey?”

He sounded guilty. “Yes, Wade?”

“So, turns out, I sent you a thong.”

“What?”

“I may or may not have immediately tried to find one on Amazon. Turns out I sent one two days ago. My bad.”

Peter could feel the beginnings of a headache. “You don’t remember? It was two days ago!”

“My memory isn’t the best, Spidey.”

Peter sighed. It really wasn’t Wade’s fault he couldn’t remember. “Look, it’s fine. Just, come get all of this stuff. The cardboard cutout is creepy.”

Wade got excited again. “Does this mean we can still hang out? Team Red isn’t dead?”