This book (Richard Ayoade’s Afterthoughts or Some Pistachios Won’t Open) has some very Rudyard-Funn-vibe quotes:
“They say no matter how much you try to hold on to something, one day it will all be gone. Apart from resentment. That you get to keep.”
“If free will is an illusion, why are you still pressing charges?”
“In arguments, it is important to listen to what the other person is saying. This is called ‘gathering evidence’.”
(More + some that remind me of other characters below the cut)
“Happiness is the shop front of self-righteousness.”
“IN PRAISE OF HATRED
1. You can’t live on spite. But it’s a good way of giving life a focus.
2. You’ve got to be cruel to be kind. And you have to be cruel to be cruel. The important thing to stress is that if you get cruelty right, everything flows from that.
3. Say what you like about hate, it’s certainly durable.”
“I don’t think anyone in a hot-air balloon should be calling themselves a pilot.”
“When did the word ‘enjoy’ start to be used, almost solely, as a command?”
“People who aren’t defensive rarely have much to be defensive about. But it’s worth attacking them anyway.”
“Most kindnesses are judgements in disguise. That’s why I refuse to be civil to others. I respect them too much.”
“It takes great courage to admit you’re wrong; it takes greater courage to randomly accuse someone else.”
“It’s hard to say I have no friends. I mean, who would I say it to?”
“Some say clothes don’t make the man. Some say clothes maketh the man. I say, ‘For God’s sake, put a top on.’”
“If I truly didn’t care, I still don’t think I’d wave my arms in the air.”
“As far as I’m concerned, Mr DJ, I am under zero obligation to make *any* noise.”
“Everything in moderation still sounds like a lot.”
“A funfair is neither.”
“While I accept that others have the right to exist, I want to make it clear that I was not consulted.”
Now that I’m looking for the Rudyard ones I keep coming across Antigone-vibes:
“Cold hands can also mean a stopped heart.”
“My mother used to say ‘You’re nothing without your health.’ But I like to think that I’m nothing in my own right.”
“Medical check-ups should be called ‘pre-mortems’.”
“Ripeness is the first stage of decay.”
“I’m very open about how hidden I am.”
“A pessimist is an optimist in disguise - a disguise that will never work.”
And some bonus Chapman-adjacent quotes:
“All is vanity, except for the noble art of generalisation.”
“They used to say that a stranger is just a friend you haven’t met. And then they met some of those strangers.”
“They say sarcasm is a last resort. But I think it’s a fun place to visit any time.”
“People need to have their emotions recognised and validated, but often it works just as well if you pretend.”
“We speak in order to convince ourselves we have something to say.”
(And Dr Edgware: “‘if you want something done well, do it yourself,’ I said. But, secretly, I was worried whether my lack of surgical experience would tell. But, by that point, the anaesthetic had started kicking in and I’d already shaved my head.”)
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happy belated wooden overcoats day here’s a supercut of every significant moment Rudyard and Dr Edgware interact with or refer to eachother in the show. i am normal.
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