In canon he's always been a pretty neat dude. I like him quite a bit in Secrets of the Clans, where he's not super into the other Clans and will skip gatherings. he's just a chill guy who meditates a lot by the river.
He's meant to be kinda mysterious and wise in Dawn of the Clans, but he never really gets the spotlight. I can think of two or three moments when he really shines.
and then we see him in Riverstar's Home where he just never has any idea what he's doing and he has a dead girlfriend (yes bc dotc needed more of those). Also his group had so many more cats that we just never saw in dotc so don't worry he has more than like 2 friends.
for my rewrite, I crammed like half of Riverstar's Home into book 2, which Ripple/River Ripple has a pov in. He keeps trying to go home while the river is both his saviour and a dangerous beast. Ripple begins to believe he was destined to stay by the river, that the river favours him because it saves him more than once in this book. At the same time, the river is terrifying because it kills. It kills the loner Whistle and it kills Fox from Clear Sky's group (he dies when Clear Sky confronts Ripple rather than Gray Wing, but Ripple keeps refusing to fight and dodging and Fox falls in. I thought it'd give Ripple an even stronger connection to the river and personal stakes against Clear Sky). The river gives life and takes it. Ripple meditates by it and learns from it, ultimately deciding to stay by the river for his new home, leading his own group there. He calls them the Cats of the River before the Clans are officially established.
This is when he renames himself to River Ripple. I chose later than in canon to give him more stuff to do in his book and to really establish when he changes his mind to stay and lead a group by the river. It's a huge change for him in his mind, and he gets the idea after chatting with Wind Runner and Gorse Fur.
His pov is in book 2, alongside Thunder Storm. I thought it'd be fun to compare these two cats who are both learning where their home is.
River Ripple is a peaceful cat, but his group eventually convinces him to fight for the river. He meets many cats that stay at his camp. Night, Mist, Hollow, Silver, Sage, Cleo, Hunter, Scout, Kite Wing, her kits, Croak... he also leaves an impact on Dew of the forest, and Dappled Pelt and Shattered Ice of the moor.
River Ripple will eventually be the one to suggest that kits get their name change when they go through a big change in their life, like he did. He's also the one to bring up mentors and apprentices bc of his own mentorship from Arc.
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Alright. There is nothing I can say that hasn't already been said. We all know the issues.
Here is how I make this somewhat better.
Bumble doesn't get told to go back to Tom in the rewrite. She is a kittypet, and enjoys her life, and doesn't want to leave it. Bumble liked her life before this new cat was in it.
So, Bumble wants to learn how to fight. Just a few moves. Nothing too complicated. All she wants to do is defend herself, and stay for a few days!
Cautiously, Grey Wing agrees, and brings Bumble to Tall Shadow. Turtle Tail is insistent on helping, and keeps talking about how "Bumble can't defend herself, she needs our help!"
Tall Shadow almost refuses when she finds out that Bumble was front paw declawed by a previous owner. Then Bumble body-slams her into the ground, and Tall Shadow goes "Alright. You can stay for a little bit."
Then Tom follows Bumble, confused about where she went. I made him visit earlier, due to drama.
He encounters Clear Sky early on, who tells him what amounts to "fuck off", finds the moor, smells Turtle Tail, and finds Grey Wing reflecting (imagine the "i was so distressed i spent the while afternoon listening to soft rock while cross-fading" clip from gumball).
Grey Wing takes one look at him, remembers Bumble, and leads him to the camp, and loudly talks about how HEY, THIS IS TOM, HE USED TO LIVE WITH BUMBLE! DOES EVERYBODY REMEMBER BUMBLE? BUMBLE IS A SHE-CAT LIVING HERE WITH NUMEROUS SCRATCHES FROM TOM! TOM WANTS TO MEET TURTLE TAIL, WHO IS PREGNANT WITH HIS KITS. TOM CARES ABOUT TURTLE TAIL, JUST LIKE HE DID ABOUT BUMBLE, WHO HE GAVE SEVERAL INJURIES!
Just about everybody realizes what's going on, including Tom, and Bumble walks out and threatens him, chasing him away because holly hell what happened to Bumble who didn't stand up for herself.
All the while Tall Shadow is going "YASS QUEEN, YOU GO GIRL!"
Anyway, after that Bumble goes back to her Twolegs, and that's generally where her arc ends. She goes to Limbo, and I am being sucked into a Bumble x Tall Shadow black hole, this is now rewrite canon.
After that, I'm unsure about how I want to kill off Tom. I sort of want to keep his canon death, as a reminder that even horrible people can do good things, but I'm also toying with the idea that Bumble tackles him into the gorge.
I've been thinking about how i'd rewrite DotC and heres what I got so far: POVS from the leaders (Only when the characters are relevant/introduced, like Shadow and Sky for the first, Thunder for the second etc), Clear SKy isnt abusive more so he was put into power too young and is too ambitious, Turtle Tail still dies, and once Gray WIng gets with Slate they find out she's barren, they act as Turtle Tail's parents, One-eye's introduced earlier, he takes over SkyClan for a bit 1/2
One-eye acts as a loner wanting to join the group, beats up Clear Sky to the point where hes too damaged to lead, Slash's group is just completely scrapped, Gray Wing has a small crush on STorm, but sees Clear SKy also does and helps them get together, Star Flower and Thunder never get together, Wind Runner isnt as mean as she was in the books, and thats about it so far. Thoughts? 2/2
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i literally forgot slash’s group was different from one eye
but yeah! i was gonna do the leaders being the pov characters as they’re introduced but making gray wing (now gray wind) the first windclan leader, so first it’s gray wind and tall shadow “but why isn’t clear sky a pov”
oh ho ho you’ll see
but im scraping slash too, as well as one eye, the arc isn’t going to be quite as long since i really just think the star flower/one eye/slash crap was all pointless
three Riverstar's Home characters for the price of one! they only get cleaned up sketches because. uhh. im lazy
in canon, Whistle and Woodlouse exist and join River Ripple's group for like a chapter or few before it's mentioned that they left. Croak is a cat who joined and then stayed, and now she definitely exists for sure
I do a lot with these guys in my rewrite. they're a trio of besties!
Whistle, Woodlouse, and Croak are three cats who live by a twoleg camp near the river. They meet Ripple's group and hear that Ripple's looking for a way home, so Whistle leads them to the beech copse near the gorge to show them a cool hunting spot and a way for Ripple to go. Whistle slips and falls down the gorge and dies, leaving Ripple with an example of the river's danger and the river's desire for him to stay.
Whistle was a loud guy, did all the talking for the three of them. He talks very casually and very confidently, and he could easily come across as annoying. Woodlouse hardly talks and Croak is quite shy, and they're good with Whistle doing the talking for them.
Whistle dying completely changes everything for Woodlouse and Croak. Neither of them want to remain in the same place, where they'd always be reminded their bestie is dead. Croak leaves to join Ripple's group to have some support, but Woodlouse wants to get as far away as possible. He crosses the river to reach the forest and is offered a spot in Clear Sky's group. He accepts. Then Woodlouse is killed in the First Battle and is scolded by the spirit of Whistle for "wanting to run as far away from him as possible"
I wanted Clear Sky to have more recruits to make the battle more even, especially since I make Dew move to the Cats of the River in book 2.
Croak is shy in Ripple's group and takes a while to open up. She's hesitant to welcome new cats into the group because the more cats there are, the more there is to lose and grieve. This parallels Night and Ripple gets to recommend that they become friends. Ripple (later River Ripple) teaches her about meditating and it legitimately helps her cope with her grief. She ends up happy.
funky lil filler cats that get to emphasize themes of belonging and support and grief. woohoo!
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I love Acorn Fur!! I love her I love her and I ALWAYS wanted her to do stuff in the books.
In canon, she doesn't really do a lot imo?? She's the littermate of Lightning Tail and Thunder, and while they care about her and like her, Thunder and Lightning Tail are a lot closer and more iconic as besties.
After the first battle, Acorn Fur loses both her parents and decides to live with Clear Sky's group... because the moor would feel different without her parents. She just joins the group of the aggressor whose battle got both her parents killed?? Joining the group led by the guy who starved her father for like two days??? She has a heartfelt goodbye with Lightning Tail and Thunder.
Apparently, Acorn Fur has nothing to say about Tom living in the forest group. When One Eye really hurts Sparrow Fur, Acorn Fur helps treat her with cobwebs. Tom is killed and Acorn Fur argues that Tom was just trying to help his kit... does Acorn Fur remember anything about Turtle Tail? She was around six moons old when Turtle Tail died, so she wasn't too young to understand what Tom did...
She was mentored by Micah and then Moth Flight about becoming a medicine cat. Moth Flight had a jealousy thing about how much Micah hung out with her but then grows to like Acorn Fur quite a bit. Then Moth Flight creates the rule that medcats can't have kits, and Acorn Fur was just talking about dating Red Claw, but she promises to stop.
ok rewrite time. I have some fun with this one
I always wanted Acorn Fur to have a bigger presence in the arc, so here we go!
In my rewrite, the different Clans have a particular theme associated with them. SkyClan is redemption, second chances, the ability to change. I always liked the idea that Skystar's group is the one with Star Flower and Red Claw in it, like Skystar is passionate about giving second chances because it's what he needed. Anyways, I wanted to work that into Acorn Fur's story--not that she has to be redeemed, but that she has a very thematically important perspective on redemption.
Acorn Fur is part of a bestie trio with Thunder Storm and Lightning Tail. She is well known in the camp for having a very sharp memory. This memory means she can go get the right thing (like herbs or a particular kind of stick or something) when older cats need. She has loving parents in Jackdaw's Cry and Hawk Swoop. She's kind of a little schemer, helping make plans to help Lightning Tail and Thunder Storm get the best misadventures!
When Thunder Storm moves to the forest, Lightning Tail and Acorn Fur go with him. Tall Shadow wants this so that at least someone will be able to talk about all they see going on in Clear Sky's group. They're basically like spies without knowing it. But Acorn Fur and Lightning Tail love the forest with Thunder Storm, and they get along well with Falling Feather. Acorn Fur and Lightning Tail also want to support Thunder Storm as friends because they know (from what their parents say) that Clear Sky gave up on Thunder Storm, and any dream Thunder Storm has of earning his father's love is doomed. They want to be there for him when he comes to the realization that Clear Sky is not a good cat.
Acorn Fur is very observant, learns a lot from Cloud Spots in the forest, and keeps an eye on everything terrible Clear Sky does. When Thunder Storm leaves the forest to support Frost, he is joined by his friends. They go back to the moor, and while Thunder Storm doesn't like talking about how terrible his father is, Acorn Fur and Lightning Tail are willing to tell everything.
Acorn Fur is also on the trip to find Turtle Tail and the kits, discovering Turtle Tail's body.
After the First Battle, Acorn Fur grieves both her parents. She fetches herbs to help treat injuries, and then decides to join Clear Sky's group to keep an eye on him. She is going to make sure Clear Sky does not start a battle like this again.
Throughout Book 4: The Blazing Star, Acorn Fur watching Clear Sky is a stand-in for the Moor Cats' opinion of him, from his pov. Acorn Fur keeps an eye out for everything he does wrong. She witnesses Clear Sky do one more round of battle training with unsheathed claws, as well as recruit Rogues who had previously attacked Wind Runner, Gorse Fur, and River Ripple. He threatens to hurt Quick Water for demeaning him in front of the new recruits. He weaponizes Acorn Fur's grief to test her loyalty to the group. He even lets Tom into the group, who they know caused Turtle Tail's death! Clear Sky is still selfish, still reckless, still awful...
But at the same time, she sees Clear Sky refuse to exile Leaf for being injured, unlike when he exiled Frost only a short while ago, and Jagged Peak long before that. In fact, Clear Sky defends Leaf from the recruit Snake, kicking out Snake for attacking Leaf. Acorn Fur sees Clear Sky recruit cats he would have once deemed 'unreliable,' and he insists on helping figure out the spirit-cats' message. She sees that the tough battle practice was different to Clear Sky this time--this time had been the last time. She sees Clear Sky recognize that he leads by fear and step down from leadership. Acorn Fur sees that Clear Sky had changed.
It would be easier if he wasn't. It would be easier if Clear Sky was still evil, still the enemy that started the battle that killed both her parents. It would be easier to hate him, but instead she's grown to respect that Clear Sky is genuinely making an effort to change. She hates it. She wants him to be worse, because why couldn't he change before both her parents had been killed? Why couldn't he change before he hurt Thunder Storm? But she has come to truly respect him and comes to terms with the idea that cats can learn and change. To everyone's surprise, when Hawk (renamed One Eye) is killed, Acorn Fur supports Clear Sky's return to leadership, as he got help from the moor cats to rescue his former group from the tyrant.
Later, Red does his thing and joins Clear Sky's group. Acorn Fur is the one to test him here instead of Snake, and Clear Sky knows she can make a good argument against him. When Red points out that cats make bad choices and mistakes and then can change, as he hasn't seen anything horrific from Clear Sky since he joined, Acorn Fur agrees. These two will later date teehee
And because I'm self indulgent, these two are going to be the first forbidden medcat couple!! Acorn Fur will secretly date Red Claw. Maybe they will have a kit named Russet Fox who they tell everyone is a random abandoned kit they found, but nobody believes them. But it's too early on for them to really care about Moth Flight's rule. Maybe Russet Fox and Honey Pelt grow up together but Honey Pelt resents that this medcat gets to have her family, when he had to be given away. Maybe maybe maybe. hmm who knows?
=-=
also also Jackdaw's Cry was big about being able to freely criticize his leader. Acorn Fur gets to also do that in Clear Sky's group, but at first feels repressed like Falling Feather did in order to keep the peace.
Jackdaw's Cry!!! I love his name and always have. I gave one of my OCs the prefix Jackdaw- before realizing they don't live in North America, where the OCs live. whoops
In canon, Jackdaw's Cry is a young cat on the Sun Trail. He is friends with Shattered Ice, working with him to invent tunnelling. He is one of the cats to disagree with Tall Shadow's method of leading and nominates Gray Wing for the job, saying they shouldn't live like mountain cats when they aren't mountain cats anymore. He has kits with Hawk Swoop.
Later on in the first half of the arc, Jackdaw's cry is taken hostage by Clear Sky? Clear Sky says he can't hunt on their territory but also he's not gonna feed him, so he's starving him for two days?? How did I completely forget about this plot point. Clear Sky says it takes moons for cats to starve but... no... it doesn't??? Just a Google search says it takes a couple of weeks but can happen sooner if the liver fails. Just not eating for 24 hours can cause health problems for cats. Clear Sky is supposed to be the 'driven to extreme measures out of his desperate fear of starvation' guy. why does he try to starve a cat. then he gets so mad at Jackdaw's Cry for hunting on neutral territory that he kills Rainswept Flower in an argument???
then he and Falling Feather kill each other in the battle. Here's the thing,, I love the idea of this. The battle brought two littermates to kill each other. They're like a mini Gray Wing and Clear Sky... but without the difference in ideology. I want there to be something more thematic when these two kill each other. I want the deaths of these cats to mean more than just another tragedy, just a higher kill count.
speaking of, rewrite time. this is gonna be a long one because I may or may not put too much thought into crap like character motivations and themes
Jackdaw's Cry loves hunting and trying new things. He and Shattered Ice are close friends, as Shattered Ice was a bit of a mentor figure to him. He tries new methods for hunting and wants his kits to be able to hunt whatever they want, trying new things and sticking to what makes them most happy.
He loves his kids. He adores how tiny the lil babies are. He gifts Acorn Fur an acorn from near Fourtrees to compare not just the fur colour, but also the size of her as a tiny newborn to the acorn. He and Hawk Swoop adopt Thunder Storm and treat him as one of their own. He is an active father and teaches his kits right away how to be safe around the camp. He is excited to take them hunting, super proud when they catch their first prey.
Jackdaw's Cry loves hunting and coming up with new ways to hunt, but he would probably say his greatest achievement is raising three great cats. He and Hawk Swoop both have big hopes for their kits to be able to grow up to do what they want--whether its explore new places, or hunt new prey. They plan another litter right before both of them die.
As for more thematic/story stuff, Jackdaw's Cry is critical of Tall Shadow's leadership but believes it better than Clear Sky's because she's not violent and power-hungry. Jackdaw's Cry and Shattered Ice are attacked by some of Clear Sky's recruits once and he's never been able to overlook that.
Jackdaw's Cry is part of what I'm dubbing the Intimidation Patrol, which is an event I made up for this rewrite. A group of cats authorized by Rainswept Flower (against the will of the other two co-leaders) is to stand beside River Ripple's group to stop Clear Sky's advances there. This would be from showing that their alliance would make them outnumber Clear Sky, so Clear Sky would stop encroaching the river (he's doing this to prevent cats from fishing/hunting nearby, some made up thing about scaring forest prey).
In this Intimidation Patrol from River Ripple's group is Dew, one of Clear Sky's former recruits that once injured Jackdaw's Cry. She apologizes, and Jackdaw's Cry is uncomfortable that she's there. Later, someone points out a scout from the forest, Falling Feather, saying they spotted an enemy. Jackdaw's Cry hearing his sister be called an enemy, as well as working beside Dew makes him reevaluate what exactly confronting Clear Sky's group would mean. It's not just a battle against Clear Sky and his nameless recruits, it's a battle against cats he thought were his friends.
Jackdaw's Cry later asks Frost why Falling Feather didn't come back to the moor with him and Thunder Storm. Frost says Falling Feather said she wanted to but had already made her choice. So, Jackdaw's Cry and Frost sneak into the forest to find Falling Feather and ask her to come to the moor. Falling Feather refuses, saying no matter how angry Clear Sky gets, his methods really do keep the group safe, a value she thought Jackdaw's Cry would care more about. But Jackdaw's Cry cares more that Clear Sky has killed people. He also notices that Falling Feather has a torn ear and wonders if she's killed people. He doesn't recognize this cat anymore. The dispute between the moor and forest cats has split these littermates apart.
Later when Clear Sky stops targeting the river for scent markers and instead decides to move them farther into the moor, Jackdaw's Cry accidentally crosses the boundary and gets terribly wounded by two forest cat recruits. This is how he gets the long scar on his side. He is rescued by Tall Shadow, which makes him respect her more, because he's always been critical of her leadership but she chose to help him, risking getting hurt herself.
For the First Battle, he faces Falling Feather and the two kill each other, siblings distanced by both physical distance and differing perspectives. Jackdaw's Cry wants his kits to be able to expand their world by trying new things, while Falling Feather following Clear Sky shows she would rather secure the safety of the group than allow individual freedoms--including her own, believing that she is stuck with the choice she made when Clear Sky first split the group.
Jackdaw's Cry was critical of Tall Shadow and spoke against her decisions he disagreed with. He felt free to do so. He died defending her leadership after coming to appreciate all she does.
Falling Feather disagreed with many of Clear Sky's decisions but felt too restricted to voice it. Instead, she convinced herself he was right. She died for Clear Sky's leadership, a cause she did not truly believe in but thought she had to fight for.
(In my rewrite thingy, I want each Clan to have a general concept attached to it, and WindClan is freedom, so I think it works)
"has a tuft of spiky fur on his head" oh so I can give him hair???
Gorse Fur is neat. He's mainly notable for being Wind Runner's mate and being WindClan's second leader. He's even in Battles of the Clans, he's the leader when Rabbittail the tunneler goes missing. He's patient and clever, teaching kits like Lightning Tail how to hunt rabbits. His canon backstory is that he was born near the reeds and moved to live on the moor.
In my rewrite, I want him to be a bit more prominent, especially since Wind Runner is a pov for books 1 and 3. His backstory is that after being born by the reeds, his mother moved them to the pines across the thunderpath. After living there for a bit, the group with Slash in it (They're called the Rogues, and that's why Clan cats call hostile loners rogues in the future) attacks them, telling them to leave. Gorse's mom refuses, and she is killed. Gorse runs away and lives by himself on the moor until he eventually meets Wind. They still get to rescue kits from a burning tree together, but Wind is so hesitant to live with other cats that it takes a little while before they decide to live together and date. After a while longer, they decide to join the moor cats. They take on longer names to show this new stage in their lives.
Gorse Fur is clever and thoughtful. Whenever Wind Runner seems to regret living with so many cats, Gorse Fur double checks if they really want to live there. He'll go anywhere with Wind Runner--even if it would mean leaving the group he's come to care about. He's super patient, understanding that how a cat acts doesn't always reflect how they feel. He's able to give Thunder Storm advice about this. In general cats think of Gorse Fur as a sensible and thoughtful cat. He flirts with Wind Runner a lot
