#doing some thinking

the thing about my parents is this.

they aren’t outwardly homophobic. they say it’s fine, they say they don’t support the catholic view of homosexuality, and i’m not going to get kicked out of the house for liking girls. truly, i can’t complain. there are loads of people who have it so much worse than me.

but here’s the thing.

there would always sort of be this quiet disappointment. it would never be said out load, aside from maybe some passive-aggressive remarks, but it would be there. i would know it. my mom would know it. i would no longer be the perfect daughter, the favorite.

i’m supposed to have a husband and a successful career so my brother can be whatever he needs to be. i don’t know if my parents can handle two lgbt kids, and i’ve always known it would be my burden to keep our family together. i was supposed to be normal and straight and not “take the harder path” as my mother says.

i mean, my mom knows that i’m bisexual. i’ve made enough jokes and tossed in girlfriend or boyfriend enough that she knows. she’s told me she has gay friends. but still. she says just date a boy because it’s an “easier life.”

quiet disappointment. i would never feel comfortable telling her about a crush on a girl.

my dad is a whole other ball game. as far as i’m aware, he has no idea i like girls, because i’ve simply never told him. allegedly he responded well to my brother being bi, but being daddy’s little girl has a whole different set of standards. i could see him throwing a fit, or just never treating a girlfriend the same way he’d treat a boyfriend.

it could also be fine. i know that. my dad will go one of two ways. he’ll either go ballistic or be completely fine with it.

the extended family is….troubling. i’m at the age where most of the older people are dying off, but i don’t want to wish death upon them because they wouldn’t support me. i know there are people who would call her my best friend, i know there are MAGA people who wouldn’t show up to a potential wedding. i know that some people wouldn’t support me.

i don’t think they’re brave enough to be outwardly homophobic but….

quiet disappointment.

i’m not ashamed of my sexuality. it’s such an important part of me, and i love women so much. but i also want to be loved by my family. i am the eldest daughter. i am the responsible one in our group of 4 cousins. the one who is always doing well. the one who never fucks up. the one who my grandma can always brag to her friends about.

I've already made this observation before, but I find it so odd that we have never seen Will bleed on screen.

In the original pilot episode he was supposed to bleed from his nose and ears in the shed as he was being kidnapped, but that didn't happen either.

When El, Kali, Terry, Henry, and the other people with strong abilities use their power, they bleed from the nose. If they use it too much, their ears bleed too.

But that's not all. We saw in season 4 that people afflicted by psychic abilities bleed too. Max, Chrissy, Patrick, Fred... we didn't see Fred bleed on screen but we saw the three others did and it was spelled out in their files that they all had the same symptoms. (headache, nosebleed, bad dreams)

So my question is... why haven't we seen Will with this symptom? He's certainly been psychically attacked. It was pretty bad actually. A whole possession too place.

I suppose when the Mind Flayer attacks its target, no bleeding occurs. The rest of the flayed didn't bleed either though they also missed quite a few symptoms Will had (eyes turning black for example)

I suppose when Henry attacks you directly, that's when the problem comes in?

Corinthian's lip trembling like a child being scolded when Dream says that Corinthian wasn't "made right"