#dog test

So many asks this is such a great week! Keep ‘em coming, guys! Or just the one of you, if it’s all the same one. Whatever.

ANYWAY

Let me be quite frank here, I am a bit passionate about how dumb I think the dog test was portrayed in the film. So don’t expect this to be all fun and games. ALSO it depends, for some things, about which Arthur we’re talking about- Chester King, or Merlin/Harry/Whoever it is that comes after V-Day. If the dog test stays after then.

MOVING ON

I think it obviously tests the limits of the trust an agent has in BOTH the person giving the test and the organisation itself. If they’ve got a background in military they’re far more likely to simply follow the order without question, or little questioning. 

It also tests their quick thinking, I think, and their observational skills. They’re likely trained with guns and how to load them and what the procedure is for them in training- why does no one check their gun? I’m certain that someone did, actually check the chambers for bullets and such, which could mess up the ‘blanks’ thing. I dunno, I’m not a professional. I also think it tests observation because the train test was a fake, it didn’t actually have any threat involved, even though it looked like it did. I think it tests whether they noticed that, and remembered it, or not. So deductive reasoning.

I think it also tests whether the potential agent in question is going to follow the spirit of the rule, or the letter of the rule. Example: ‘Shoot the dog’ implies shoot to kill, because it’s a gun and an order to what is honestly just a souped up mercenary. BUT one could just as easily shoot a foot, or the tail, and still have carried out the letter of the rule without following the spirit of it. I think that this kind of distinction also helps them gauge what kind of missions they’d be sent on, or specialise in, in the beginning. Time can fix most perceived weaknesses, so obviously not permanently, but yeah. At least for a time.

If an agent reacts to the order right away, without any sort of thought, I feel like it implies that they’re a bit trigger happy- simply awaiting the word that they’re allowed to fire without thinking about the consequences. I think they’d be watched closely.

I think if a prospective agent takes the gun and then studies the agent giving the test before ultimately shooting, they’re seen as an intelligent person, not doing things without thought or reason, but ultimately still following orders.

Someone who checks the gun would probably also fall into that category, I think. If not null the test entirely and force them to think of or bring back an old one.

I think it matters a lot how relaxed a candidate is upon receiving the order. Eggsy, likely, would have been watched closely for mental whatevers had he passed the test. His hands shook, though he never had a finger on the trigger, and that’s a risk. But this has a lot with how I see Eggsy’s character, with his morals being geared for guilt/innocence instead of having some kind of loyalty to humanity. 

Body language depends a lot upon the circumstances in which the order is given. Just look at the differences between Eggsy and Roxy’s dog tests! Roxy was given a gun professionally, in a room where she was standing awaiting an order. There was no pleasant conversation or joking, just an order. Eggsy, on the other hand, was seated in a room near a fireplace and pulled into conversation before a gun was pulled from nowhere and the order was given. It’s different.

I think it matters A LOT who gives the test to each prospective agent. (here is a link to my discussions about the dog test from early days of fandom and such) If there’s two equally mysterious people giving the test, that’s one thing, but to give one a familiar/trusted face and the other a near stranger is not fair. It’s a different test.

Okay, so I know that everyone and their maiden aunts have headcanons about the dog shooting test, but hear me out.

The Kingsman trainees never went on real missions before passing the dog test - that would mean that both Lee and the-soon-to-be-Lancelot had to pass the dog test before Lee died, right? I know some people suggested that if both Roxy and Eggsy passed, then they would have went on missions until one of them failed something, and that’s probably right. Everything before the dog test was carefully rigged, no one actually died etc...

So... Where the fuck is Lee Unwin’s dog?

Even if they didn’t give the dog to Michelle and Eggsy I think that we can agree that Harry would have taken care of it as much as he took care of Mr. Pickles and had it stuffed after it passed to remind himself of his mistake, right?

So, I was thinking that maybe Arthur was the one to oversee Lee’s test - and he didn’t use blanks, because maybe Lee - who didn’t belong to Kingsman according to Arthur - would break, would quit after shooting his own dog point blank... He probably found some excuse to tell Harry. Hell, maybe Harry and Lee didn’t have time to talk because that tragic mission happened right after, and when Harry asked later, after Lee’s funeral, Arthur told him that the dog had to be put down for some reason or another.