#divacups

I have a menstrual cup stuck inside my vagina; I repeat, I have a menstrual cup STUCK inside my vagina! I know I should probably be posting this on a menstrual cups board, or something, but maybe you guys can help me.

I just recently heard about Divacups and thought they sounded like a great alternative to the pads I usually use. I hardly ever use tampons, because my period tends to leak right past them, plus the risk of toxic shock, PLUS it always feels like I have to give painful, scratchy BIRTH to get them out. So I ordered a couple size 1 Divacups in the mail and just got them today and decided to try a dry run while not on my period.

I'm a virgin, and my gynecologist said I have an especially tight hymen. I also have weak, short fingers, and short little t-rex arms. And now I have discovered I apparently have a high cervix. The perfect storm.

It was really difficult getting it in; it felt more like stuffing it in. I felt it pop once I finally managed to fit it in, but I wasn't sure it sealed right. The stem was off to one side awkwardly. I tried pushing it in a little further, to try to get it to be in right. Tried twisting it like it recommends, but there's no way I can budge that thing!  So I skipped that. I left it in for a few minutes just to get used to it. It gave me some little cramps, and occasionally, I felt the stem, but otherwise, it was fine. It feels almost invisible inside me now (which only further negates my motivation to keep trying to get it out).

However, when I tried to get it out, I couldn't. Can't. It's been four hours, and I've been trying on and off. I've tried nearly everything I can think of... I've read up a lot, and I know my goal should be to break the suction before trying to pull it out. From what I've read, I think it has a suction grip on my cervix.

I've tried sticking my longest finger in and trying to press the bulb against my vaginal wall to break the seal, but no dice. I've tried two fingers, but no dice. I've tried finger and thumb, but my fingers/arm are too short to reach properly, and it's a tight fit. I can't even get a good grip on the stem, let alone the bulb. I've tried inserting two clean highlighter pens to chopstick it out. Nope. I've even tried a spoon, which actually WENT IN, to my surprise. But still can't break the seal.

I've tried sitting on the toilet, lying down, squatting, putting one foot on the toilet, curling up like a roly poly head-down on my bed. Tried bearing down and relaxing, and I can tell all these thing make some sort of difference, but none have gotten it OUT. Each time, I try until it gets to the point where I can't fit anything in without pain or irritation, and I have to take a break. I'm just so tired of trying.

My best (male) friend has been insisting I go to the hospital this whole time, and I DON'T WANT TO. I don't care about embarrassment, but I don't have the money or effort for that crap. Not for something like this. Not only would I have wasted 40 bucks on my Divacup kit, but I would also have an ER bill AND would have to be social. Screw that. I want to get this fixed in a way that will allow me to try this again, while on my period!