#ditzee

So yeah, I just need to vent about a few things, it's fine if you don't read but it would be nice if you did, but it's totally up to you. x) 

My life has been pretty shit recently, yet I still find strength to push myself through day to day, which is all anyone could ask for, right? My friendship group at college are becoming a huge pain in my life, a pain which I could ideally live without. All they do is bitch about one another behind each others back, and first I just sat back and let them do whatever, I wasn't arsed unless it was something extremely mean. But then, my mum died last year, of course, it hit me hard. blah blah blah, time had come where I had to go to a CAHMS group as a "urgent patient" and they soon put me on anti depressants; which have worked amazingly! They say hurt changes people. And by the way my "friends" have been acting towards me I feel that they don't like the way that the pain has changed me. Instead, I stand up for what I believe in, I stand up against them and especially the liar who I hate the most, in fact my group was lovely before he turned up. We clash all the time, and how he bitches about people, people would automatically assume he was a girl if they didn't know him. 

Also, my best friend has recently got herself a boyfriend and by recently I mean last March. Don't get me wrong, I am thrilled that she is back in a relationship but she just hasn't got the balance between best friends and boyfriends, it feels like she is pushing me out all the time. On Saturday, my family had a huge bonfire party and I invited her, but she turned up 2 hours late!! stayed for 2 hours and then went off with him again, as well as the liar who I spoke about before. When they came to pick her up, the liar was rude to my cousin. I haven't said anything to him but I really want too.  I spoke about this to her and all she kept saying was that she was sorry and shit, I do forgive her but she needs to realise that he wont be there one day, he will break her heart and who will be there to pick up the pieces? Me. But if she continues to act this way to me, I'm afraid to admit I might not be there to pick the pieces up.