#disapearing

Let me start off with rewatching this movie is, personally, definitely a must.

Anyway, I don’t know about all of you guys, and I may be stating the obvious here.... but for some reason I found the contrast in the “disappearing/death” scenes between T’chala and spidey to be extremely jarring. They were so different. One disappearing as though he never existed. Not even showing any signs of discomfort. The other begging to be saved. Showing that they feel everything that’s about to happen. And at first i was so...confused? Why did one clearly show signs of pain, panic, and discomfort and the other seem to disappear painlessly and quickly? Shouldn’t it hurt the same for all of them? Shouldn’t they all be as pained?

And then it hit me..... spidey? He’s a kid. He’s little wide eyed Peter Parker with the references and innocence. Sure he’s felt his fair share of pain.... but hes no combat veteran. He wasn’t born into or lived a life of fighting like most of the others.

T’chala is used to feeling pain, conditioned into worrying about others and their safety before analyzing himself and how his body may feel. Scarlet witch just lost the love of her life... twice (one being by her own hand), and she seemed to accept/ignore the “pain” of disappearing because her emotional state has her numb at this point...but she seems to know whats happening. Bucky seems to feel it...or better yet, recognize it to late. And so on and so forth with everyone else.

Different ranges and exhibitions of discomfort that all feel to be eerily...quiet.

But Peter? He’s just a kid. And he’s scared. And his spidey sense is probably going off like crazy. And he’s feeling a pain or discomfort or maybe just a sensation he’s never even imagined of.

And whats the first thing he does? Reach out to Stark. He goes to the only person he felt safe with. The “father figure”. The man who he looks up to. And he frantically looks for some form of comfort. Because he doesn’t want to go. Because he doesn’t want to be alone.

And that....that hurts me.