#diggysimmonsimagines

“Do you have the diaper bag?” Diggy yelled from across the hotel room while holding Antoine in his arms.

You twirled around in a pair of all black spiked Louboutin loafers. Your hair was down & straight with extra gloss, then began walking toward your family.

“It’s right by the luggages at the door” you called finally approaching your family, you kissed your babyboy on his forehead as Daniel continued to hold him.

“What? Mommy ain’t got no kiss for me?” he teased, you stuck your tongue out at him playfully, he scrunched his nose at you.

“Ye ain’t cute scrub” he teased more waiting for your reaction,

“Ima remember that when you tryna be smooth in the bed” you laughed joking with Diggy. He now stood salty, you walked away toward the door waiting on your two boys.

“No wait”

“Babeeee, NO!” he whined chasing after you, you began to giggle at him, while he stood aggravated. You continued to laugh then smirk, pulling his face down to be at your height, you crushed your lips against his leaving a big red apple lip print on his. He then looked at you with a giant grin, you then stood up tall to whisper in his ear,

“I got more for you tonight after hours babyboy….” your voice lingered in his ear while you kissed on it teasing him.

He looked at you with such spark & zest in his eyes,

“Lets go then…………” he spoke back his eyes remained on you, your heart skipped a couple beats while staring at your lover, & your beautiful child.

~later on~

“When did yall arrive?” you spoke into the phone while you, Diggy, & son Antoine rested on a private jet, the sun was beaming through the windows, the clouds completely whisked away showing off the perfect sky blue.

“We touched down a couple hours ago cause our flight left real early this morning New York time. I got ma & dad with us too” your sister Sienna spoke into the phone, this year for the Christmas family vacation, both sides of the family would be accompanied together at a large private beach house in Europe. This had been decided right after the vacation last year to Brazil, you & Daniel were super siked to have the family all together before Christmas at home in NYC. Your sister Sienna was older than you by a few years, you two were very close, her husband Marcus was Jojo’s age. Antoine had two boy cousins on that side, Xylander who was 3, & Quentin who was 5.

“Whats the house like?” you asked getting comfortable in your plane seat, Diggy eavesdropped in while Antoine slept peacefully in his arms.

“Oh my god girl it is so big! There is a east wing, a west wing, south wing, north wing! ITS A MANSION.” Sienna laughed into the phone, you giggled along with her,

“Alright well we left Milan an hour ago, so will be there probably in an hour & a half” you bit down on your lip.

“Sounds good girl, were super excited!”

“We are too, see you when we get there, talk to you later!” you spoke into your Iphone6

“Girl, ima have to get me a tracking device for these boys they gon get lost in this big house! but yeah, will see you when yall get here, bye!” you sister spoke fast, you laughed then hung up.

You sighed & looked at Diggy cradling Antoine, you smiled at the cute sight.

“Sienna & your parents there?” Diggy asked beginning to make conversation,

“Mhmmm” you nodded looking forward at him, with a little pout. He looked confused,

“Whats wrong baby?” Diggy questioned, you sighed once more.

To be quite honest, since the baby had been born a lot of responsibility came into place, obviously because you two were now parents. It was absolutely wonderful & each moment was grand, but it did get a little bit it tiring at times, & sometimes it took away from time with the two of you. You hadn’t felt distant from Daniel, you just wanted to spend some private time with him, Milan was the complete opposite. Although you two were together, you were running around the whole time working on fashion shows & work, Diggy was spending the majority of the time hanging out with Antoine for the couple days in Italy. You were hoping this Christmas vacation would give you two some time to really be together.

You got up from the seat then stood in front of Diggy, he looked up at you with his big beautiful brown eyes,

“lemme hold him” you put your arms out, Diggy then passed Antoine over to you in your arms, you smiled largely automatically as your son lay curled up taking a long cat nap.  

“Whats the matter girl?” he asked once more this time he touched your thigh as you continued to stand, you smiled…

“I wanted to sit on your lap.” you looked down at your feet, Diggy chuckled,

“Come here then” he smiled up at you, you then sat yourself down, & Diggy quickly embraced you in his arms while you held Antoine.

“My big baby” he laughed while kissing your cheek, you giggled, while his kisses continued until his phone rang.

You two always seemed to be getting interrupted, he kissed you on the side of your forehead before answering his phone,

“Yo.”

“Ya, me & Ang are here” Jojo spoke into the phone, Diggy rolled his eyes,

“Okay, yall meet up with Y/N’s parents & sister?”

“Yeah, we just chatted for a minute, but me & Ang wanted to settle in first, you gotta see these rooms man, they’re lux!” Jojo exclaimed, Diggy laughed,

“Alright man, well I think Ness is traveling solo with Mike, & Ava, & dad, ma, Russ & Miley should be coming thru same time”

“Yeah Ang is on the phone with Vanessa right now, what are yall gonna get here?” Diggy’s oldest brother asked,

“Another hour probably, shouldn’t be too long”

“K man, I’ll talk to you then”

“Alright bro, bye” Diggy hung up, he thought to himself that that was a pointless conversation, but these vacations that included everyone came with that. Diggy laid back his head & closed his eyes. You looked up at him, Antoine still asleep. You kissed his lips softly, he smiled with his eyes still closed.

“I love you” he spoke with a tired voice,

you leaned your head on his chest, then breathed softly,

“I love you too baby” you whispered.

~later on~

“My god this is a huge house” Diggy pulled up to the villa, there were several rental all white escalades in the front.

You glanced out the window then into the rear view mirror to see Antoine still asleep in his little car seat.

The view was absolutely gorgeous, the villa was all white with open space, the view of the ocean in the back was stunning with the sun beaming down on it, the ocean was the colour of a blue diamond, it was surrounded by trees, stone paths and walls, greek statues all in the front, it was so unreal.

“Gawd Digg this is beautiful” you both stared at it while Diggy put the car in park, he nodded his head, you two both starred the view for another moment before getting out to really stand back & look at it. It was absolutely perfect the breeze felt so much nicer than the NY winter weather.

You went around to grab Antoine out of the car in his carrier/car seat, Diggy retrieved the luggages in the back as well, then you two walked up the stairs of stone, towards the front door entrance.

“We made it babyboy, & you’re still asleep!” you smiled with little laughter talking quietly to Antoine.

Diggy reached for the key which was given at the front entrance which was guarded by private security. He took it out then pushed it into the keyhole, your parents, were the first to greet you at the door.

“Y/N & DANIEL ARE HERE, MERRY CHRISTMAS BABY” your mom hollered in such excitement squeezing you tightly in a hug, then Diggy, you both laughed,

“MY GRANDSON IS HERE TOO!!” your mother was overjoyed,

“Yes mom, merrychristmas, but he’s asleep right now & I don’t want him to wake cos then he’ll be crabby” you tried to calm your mother down, Diggy just continued to grin.

“I know, what I can’t be excited to see my family?” you mother questioned, your dad gave her a stank face,

“Woman can’t you see they just got here they’re just trying to get settled in, I swear one more folk ring the do’bell & you freak out, mmm” your dad teased your mom, your mother laughed playfully pushing your father, even at their old age they still acted young.

“Oh hush ol’ man, don’t be a grinch!” your mother teased back, you & Diggy began to bust out in laughter,

“Come on in babygirl, whatchu standin in the do’way fo’?” your dad pulled you in for a hug,

“Hey son, hows it goin, merry christmas!” your dad greeted Diggy pulling him in for a hug, then he smiled at his grandson still sleeping.

You & Diggy finally moved away from the doorway & into the whole house just examining the whole place, it was so gorgeous on the inside, a modern European look, it smelled wonderful, it was truly paradise.

“WELCOME TO GREECE!!!” you sister entered the room with her arms out ready to embrace you into a tight sisterly hug, you were taken by surprise, you set Antoine’s carrier down to hug your sister.

“Oh my god! I missed you!!!” you exclaimed hugging your sister super tight, you two were laughing in such excitement to be in eachothers presence it had been a while.

“Oh & look at my sweet baby nephew! Ugh he gets cuter & cuter” Sienna gushed about Antoine getting down to floor level to kiss him while he napped.

“HEY YOU!!” Sienna was excited to see Diggy too as they too hugged, shortly after Xylander & Quentin yours & Diggy’s nephews came running through the halls obnoxiously, Xylander trying to stay on his feet.

“C’mon yall, I said no running! One of yall is gonna fall!” Sienna scolded her boys, you busted out laughing.

“XYLANDER BOY YOU BETTA CATCH UP WITH Q HE’S GONNA BEAT YOU!” Marcus, your brother in law cheered on his youngest son, he smiled laughing watching his boys run to Diggy. They absolutely adored him.

“Marcus don’t encourage them!” Sienna growled at Marcus while he caught up,

“UNCLE DIGGY!” Quentin came running up to Diggy with his arms out ready to be lifted up by him, Diggy laughed picking up his nephew in his arms,

“Hey lil man!” he smiled while he hugged Quentin, Xylander pulled on Diggy’s black ACNE studio jeans,

“oncccle diggy!!!!” Xylander cheered, Diggy set Q down to pick up Xylander in his arms, he began to giggle, & you laughed watching them get all excited about Diggy.

“Hey girl, merrychristmas!” Marcus came over to give you a hug,

“Look at lil dude passed out” Marcus smiled at his nephew, baby Antoine.

“My kids love you man, its good to see you!” Marcus came over to Diggy putting his hand on his shoulder, Diggy laughed.

“Right Xy?” Marcus pinched Xylander’s cheek as he continued to be hyper & overly excited in Diggy’s arms.

“YEAH!” Xylander squealed, everyone laughed,

“C’mon yall, let’s go see the beach” your dad motioned his grandkids over to him to follow him & your mother outside, Diggy set Xylander down, & he followed up with Quentin.

“They are so hyper, they must’ve had more than 3 pouches of fruit snacks I swear!” Sienna watched her kids follow their grandparents outside to the water. You watched smiling extremely happy to be with your family.

“Whaddappp fam!” a voice called walking over to the group of young adults now was Jojo, Diggy lit up cheesin hard,

“Awww bro!” Diggy went up to hug his brother he hadn’t seen in a while,

“hey sis hows’ it goin, merry christmas!” Jojo came over to you, side hugging you giving you a kiss on the head,

“what is good homie! It’s been a minute!” you embraced him back,

“DAWGGGG!!!!” Angela came running through as hyper as your nephews, you were so excited to see your sister in law, you two were uberly close!

“DAWGGG!’ you hollered back, giving her a hug, everyone was so excited to be in eachothers presence.

“DIGGUTH!” Ang went up to embrace her baby brother, Diggy rolled his eyes at that, but hugged his sister right back, you cracked up,

“you know he hates that!” you laughed,

“I know girl!” she agreed, then bent down to greet Antoine who she hadn’t seen in a long time.

“Yo he is so cute oh my god, Digg he looks just like you! But yall have to see Ava she’s so beautiful! just love the family expanding more & more” she paused, “I love you kids they are too cute!” continuing on referring to your sisters boys. Sienna laughed & thanked her,

“C’mon yall, get settled!” Marcus began pushing you & Diggy jokingly, you two laughed, then you picked Antoine up and you two followed down a broad hallway to explore & find your bedroom, and Antoines..

“Oh yeah, Antoine’s nursery is right across from your room just FYI” Sienna yelled down the hall.

The luggages rolled behind Diggy as he took both in his hands. When you two finally found your room, you two were amazed with the way it looked. A giant king sized bed, with all white sheets, & a canopy of transparent white curtain, a large open view of the ocean, stone flooring, light oak pillar ceiling, a projector screen, it was amazing. You two set your stuff down the side & just breathed to take it all in.

“Whatchu think A’s room looks like?” you asked, while taking him out of the carrier & into your arms.

“Ion know….this is real nice Y/N. Real nice. But lets go check it out” Diggy looked around then you two walked out together across the hall to Antoine’s room.

His was an exact replica with a little crib, a canopy above, changing table, but no projector screen. It was perfect for the baby.

“Should we put him down now?” Diggy asked looking at the crib, you bit down on your lip debating with the baby in your arms.

“I don’t see why not, he’ll wake up in the next hour, I don’t want him around all the noise” you spoke, then walked over to the crib to release him & softly place him down in his new bed for the next two weeks.

“You got the monitors?” Diggy asked turning to you,

“They’re in the diaper bag” you mentioned, Diggy left for a second to retrieve them. He set it up quickly then you two closed the door walking out & back across the hall to your room.

You checked your phone right away to pull up the camera monitor which connects with your cellphone so you can keep eye out for Antoine.

You & Diggy just stood for a moment looking out at the ocean view in front of the bed,

“You think my parents are here yet? or Ness?” Diggy asked putting his arm around you while you two enjoyed the view with the sun glistening on the water, you two could see your parents, sister, Marcus, and nephews, Ang, & Jojo out in the sand playing with a ball enjoying it all.

“Couldn’t tell ya babe” you shrugged,

“Should I go check?”

“They’ll call, besides Ness isn’t supposed to get in for another hour or same with ma & dad,” you clenched onto Diggy’s arm, he looked over at you then kissed your forehead,

“You wanna go out to see the beach?”

“Honestly baby….I kinda just wanna chill on the bed right now, I’m tired” you spoke shyly looking up at him, he smiled with soft brown eyes,

“Okay…we can do that” he took your hand & pulled you over to the fluffy king sized bed, there was a gold sun up above it as decor.

“If you wanna go outside, you can…I’ll be alright. I’m just a little overworked right now”

“No baby. I just wanna be witchu right now….just you” he cooed, you two climbed on top of the bed, it was so soft like a feather you were ready to just fall asleep right now & take a cat nap like Antoine.

You curled up into Diggy while he laid out on his back with an arm above him, & one around you,

“You want me to rub your booty?” Diggy asked quietly taking your hand & kissing your fingers with his soft warm lips.

"Is it weird that everyone is coming over this year for Thanksgiving?" you rolled over on the bed to face Diggy who had his glasses on focused on his laptop. He licked his lips focusing on responding to emails, work related. You paused waiting for him to respond, he didn’t move or notice you were trying to get his attention. “Daniel?” you laughed shaking him on the arm, he wore a soft grey crew neck. Your hair began to fall in your face like a veil while you laid on your side, “Hmm?” he pressed his lips together typing fast not even looking at you. You let out a sigh trying not get frustrated. “Babe, I’m over here” you waved your hand in the air flashing the rock on your finger. “Huh? Oh, yeah I know” Diggy breathed then paused to look at you, you were upset, “What?” he looked at you, your face completely dropped as you rolled your eyes. “Hey, come here, give me a kiss” he pulled you close to him, your lips touched and he pecked it 3 times, then he rubbed your cheeks with his thumbs after. “I love you” he smiled looking into your eyes, you kissed his hand, “I love you more” you breathed softly, Then you two sat in comfort for a minute, you then closed & slid his MacBook aside on the bed hoping that he’d avoid it for the rest of the night.

He looked at you with a fidgety face on.

"Babe c’mon, I got things to take care of" he looked at you trying to persuade you to let him continue, “yeah you also have a family to take care of” you looked at him with a little eyebrow raise. He sighed & laid back. “Yes baby, I do take care of yall. Daddy just has some business priorities in order to make his wifey happy & pay for his sons diapers” Diggy smiled at you grabbing for you hand, kissing your fingers, you laughed, “Fineee. I’m giving you another 20minutes but that’s it.” you kissed his face 59392 times, then rolled off the bed and exited the bedroom. Diggy watched you walk off in athletic Nike booty shorts, he smirked then retrieved his laptop.

~20 minutes (exact) later~

You walked back in with bunny slippers on your barefeet, you carried a sleepy baby Antoine in your arms. He was snuggled up in his fuzzy green t-Rex pajama’s with little footies, his curls were so pretty, & he rested his wittle head on you. Diggy looked up at you two, then back down at the laptop. “times up Digg” you walked around bouncing with your steps cradling your son. “Yeahh yeah I know it’ll be a couple more minutes I gotta negotiate something real quick” he put his hands up to his face and rubbed his eyes as he was getting tired. “Ugh” you sighed. Antoine began gurgling, “If only ‘daddy’ could take some time & read you a bedtime story huh baby?” you spoke aloud to little Antoine, you stroked his little peachy cheek. “YN, baby? c’mon. ‘daddy’ is finalizing tour dates, he’ll be with yall in a second” Diggy looked up at you while you walked toward him. He remained still while you took the laptop off his lap. Diggy looked at you annoyed and you giggled. Then you climbed on top straddling him. He put his arms around you, while you held onto each other’s son. Diggy smiled up at you and touched your lips, you kissed his fingers, then reached out to grab his glasses off his face. You stuck them on your face & began to make faces with them on. Diggy began to laugh and he pulled his phone out to snap some photos. Antoine was beginning to doze off, Diggy kissed Antoine multiple times. “We have a beautiful family YN” he whispered watching his sons eyes close as Antoine fell asleep in your arms. You looked up at him in his brown eyes, and nodded. “You wanna put him down?” you asked, “Uh, Id like to, but babe I really gotta finish this. Tomorrow night, it’s all me, okay?” You got annoyed all over again. You removed his glasses and placed them back on Daniel. “That’s the 5th time this week Daniel.” you rolled your eyes then got off him and off the bed now standing. “YN, trust me I know. Tomorrow, okay?” “Daniel seriously I need your help around here. Baby I know you’re busy but tomorrow is thanksgiving so if you could just really help out & avoid work please baby!” “Thanksgiving is tomorrow?” Daniel asked surprised and his eyes all big. You sighed with your palm to the face. then didn’t respond just exited out the bedroom & across the hall to take Antoine to his crib.

~shortly after~

2 Months Later

“We are here joined with rap star Diggy Simmons, who is back in the studio, recording, & gettin back to the grind, it’s great to have you here wit us again Digg, how you been?” an interviewer from an entertainment news channel spoke into her microphone while people could watch Diggy on TV doing an interview.

The sheets were messy, it was almost close to the sun to say goodbye while it blazed over the Manhattan skyline. The penthouse bedroom window had a gorgeous view of what NYC had to offer, the fire was lit burning once more keeping the room warm with sparks of romance flying around.

“It’s great to be here thank you for having me, I’ve been doing really good actually, back in the studio, got new music comin’, shows comin’ up, bunch of projects, a TV show that will premiere in early ‘15….its all gettin exciting as the holidays are comin’ up” Diggy replied into his own mic that he wore over his all black outfit with his favorite gold angel necklace around him.

  In bed it was so comfy leaving wasn’t anywhere in the future at the moment, everything was where it should be, everything was feeling better than how it should ever feel, because even if the bed was a mess, and champagne that had been sitting out since the previous night, it was a feeling that felt more warm than the fire burning.

  “We heard about that, now this is a series & your first acting debut right?”

“Well kinda I’ve popped up in a few things every now & then but I’ve got a main role so its a little bit of a debut” Diggy nodded,

“You’ve been wanting to pursue acting for a while, do you think this is going to open any doors for you, and would it affect your music career?”

“Definitely I hope there would be opportunities down the road & to come, but nah. Music is my first & foremost love, I’ll always keep goin with my music, it might be on hold every now & then but breaks usually mean I’m still always writing”

“Thats good you’ve already got your mind set to your priorities, not a lot of young people usually know what they’re gonna do once they start moving onto other projects. What’s coming up with your new music?”

“Hahaha, you know a young man has gotta get things right for his future. But um, I have 3 singles out right now, a little preview for my fans of my upcoming EP that will drop in ‘15 too, they’re pretty hot tracks” Diggy smiled with a cheese while he perked up talking about his new music, the interview laughed along with him,

“We did hear the full songs, I’m definitely in love with each of them. You’re starting to sing a little bit more, you have very nice vocals!”

“Thank you thank you, spent a lot of time working on them, you know because really I haven’t sung on any other songs since 4 Letter Word.”

“The vocals were good in that song too! But I just wanna backtrack before you were talking about gettin your priorities straight for your future, & since we brought up 4 Letter Word….” the interview began to have a little smile on her face while Diggy began to laugh looking at his black LV’s on his feet.

“See you already know what I’m gonna ask, look atchu gettin shy” the interview teased Diggy, they both laughed,

“How is your 4 Letter Word, and is there anything coming up special in the future for you two?”

“Well um. She’s doing real well, you know she’s jetsettin off on her own with her fashion career, she’s hosted a lot of shows, helped collab with designers, coordinated shows, a lot of things. I’m very proud of her, she always talked about this when we were younger & now she’s really off doin it.” Diggy smiled blushing a little while he bragged about you,

“Okay okay, she’s doin her thing, I know we spoke with her earlier too a long time back, but she was talking about how she was doing it big. Thats great. Is it different when she’s the one who is traveling & gone?”

“It is, our schedules never really go together, if I’m out of town for a while she’ll come with if she’s able to, or she’s back home working. Fashion week is always difficult especially when she’s out of the country for it, it’s weird when she isn’t home for a week or two & I am. We always are making the most of our time together, we have a family vacation comin’ up with both of our families which also will tie in the two of us goin out to Milan for her work purposes.”

“Geese you guys are non stop. That seriously is awesome tho to hear, you guys really are the jetsetting couple! I’m def glad to hear that you two are gettin in as much time as possible with eachother. It was what a couple months ago there was a little trouble in paradise?” the interviewer asked, Diggy smirked & paused before answering,

  At home you sat up in the blankets pressed against your bare skin, you turned the volume up eager to hear what Daniel was going to say.

  “Yeah. A couple months ago, it was a very dark time for the both of us.” Diggy nodded,

“Okay, you were kinda MIA during this time too, what was going on with you when this was happening?”

“I was actually hiding out back at home in Jersey, kinda just tryna avoid any kind of connection the industry. That was probably good for me, you know I didn’t need the spotlight on me while there were problems going on, thats the stuff I think our young entertainers gotta be aware of. It was nice to have that break & just kinda breathe, I was writing the whole time, but I even avoided the studio. It wasn’t fun but it reminded me of what is really important to me & what I wanted to be a part of my future.”

“Gosh Digg, you are so wise for you age. There were a lot of rumors speculating around about what happened between you two, do you wanna clarify those rumors?”

“Which rumors? I was ignoring a lot of hollywood when it happened so I wasn’t really in the loop to be honest.:

“There were cheating rumors, rumors you got kicked out, etc”

“Well um. I did get kicked out.” Diggy kinda laughed about that,

  You sat in the fluff of the white blankets thinking back to the day you did that, & to the present which was now. Things really turn around if you have faith they will.

  “Okay so you did? Do you wanna explain more?”

“The cheating rumors are false. I’m not saying that to save my ass, & not look like a dick on TV. or to keep myself looking good. What I did was the biggest mistake I’ve made, it didn’t take long for me to realize that. She left for Paris just to be there for a few weeks. It was almost a month, I was back at home doing some shows here & there. I really missed her the whole time, I ended up getting courtside tickets to a Knicks game, it was gonna be just me & Spin, then I ended up meeting this girl, I hate to admit that it was a heat of the moment, I was very vulnerable. But I was so wrong for it. I was selfish. We ended up goin to the game together, she was real cool, I honestly thought she was something special for a second. We never kissed or anything like that. We did hold hands though, and there were a couple hugs. It didn’t take long for Y/N to find out. We got in an argument, I was the biggest jerk. I hurt the one person I never wanted to, this girl was it for me, & I lost sight of that, she had every right to do what she did. I regret what I did, but I’m so thankful that I get to go back home to her after this. It was then it was the type of moment & you think like ‘this is it for me’ ya know?”

You felt your heart beat fast, you got a twinkle in your eye from the tears welling up,

“Wow. You admit that you were in the wrong, how did you guys step forward from that, because obviously there is the phrase ‘time does heal’ how does that relate to this situation?”

You waited,

Diggy paused in the interview before answering it,

“Time does heal. It wasn’t going to be easy. We didn’t expect it to be easy. We had to pick up the pieces & start over. It was more of really finding eachother again, & reasons why we went back into this. There was a lot of patience involved in it, there still is. But we had to take the first step by moving on. Forgiveness. We couldn’t dwell in the pain, we had to step forward which isn’t easy at all. But we can’t fear or change the past, we have to live for now. ‘now’ has become infinite, there would be no point to stay stuck in a past when there are timeless amounts of the presences which is ‘now’. My love for her is infinite, its timeless, my future is with her. This only made us come together in a way we never were. Its rare to have something like that, but we are very rare.”

  Your hands came up to cover your mouth as you were speechless, the words wrapped around yourself sweeter than lavender.

  “I really admire you Diggy very much. That’s advice & words for anyone of all ages to live by, ‘now’ is infinite. So did you also just admit to us that she’s your future?” the interview smiled large awaiting to gush over the response, Diggy laughed smiling hard too,

“She is. She is my ‘now’ & as long as ‘now’ is infinite, timeless, & forever, then certainly” he smiled with a twinkle in his eyes.

  The interview went off, & your heart wouldn’t stop singing,

“Baby” a voice called from the other room which lead to the closet & bathroom. You looked over to watch Diggy walk out shirtless with only his favorite Hilfiger sweatpants on. You smiled at him, his eyes glued on you while he walked forward barefoot onto the bed. You came forward to while still sitting up on the bed.

“Hmm?” you asked while he now was up in your face with beautiful dark eyelashes so long, his eyes looked into yours, his hands now around you & your bare skin the covers no longer around you as he embraced you in a kiss his hands around your bareback. The lingering kiss lead the two of you to falling backward onto the bed where ‘now’ was waiting.

You two stood in silence for a few seconds, before you both were avoiding eye contact trying to figure out what to say to eachother.

You two hadn’t talked or seen eachother since the huge fight/breakup.

“Um….” Diggy began he stuttered a little, you couldn’t look up at him. You just couldn’t you didn’t have the nerve.

“Sorry to just come thru like this….can I….can I come in?” he looked dumbfounded but you both weren’t sober, you both we’re crying over this, neither of you wanted to be in this situation at all. But here you both were.

You looked up at him blankly, his eyes were shot, you didn’t move, you just stood still for a moment as you continued to hide behind the door.

“I’m sorry...I’ll...just….leave, this was a dumb idea….I’m sorry.” he started backing up as he was going to leave, you then looked away then closed the door.

When you closed the door you realized that you couldn’t just let him bleed like that, you weren’t sure what happened, despite what happened you loved that boy more than basically anything,

Quickly you opened the door again, Diggy was halfway down the hall toward the elevator when you called for him,

“Wait!” you yelled down the hall, Diggy stopped right away, he looked back at you, there was no expression, he looked so sick.

You both paused again in awkwardness.

“Give me a minute, just wait outside the door…” you spoke up as you felt meekly about it all.

Diggy swallowed hard, then trudged back to the door that he used to come through all the time with flowers in his hands for you.

You closed the door again, he waited outside it patiently.

You rushed upstairs to the bedroom zooming to your closet, you went too fast for the stage you were in you damn near tripped over the mess on your closet floor as you quickly pulled removed your bra, changed your panties, then put an oversized t-shirt on, then your bunny slippers, & your white fuzzy bathrobe to cover yourself.

Once you were dressed again, you were just about to head back downstairs when you felt vomit coming up, you rushed yourself to the bathroom, barely making it, you threw up in the toilet, you felt like shit. You just wanted to sleep, but this whole night had just been a huge blur & seeing Daniel for the first time started to make your heart race a lot, you were nervous, & you just didn’t know what to do about it.

It had been at least 15 minutes Diggy was sitting outside the door, you quick brushed your teeth & washed your face, then made your way back downstairs still tasting that vomit mixed with mint toothpaste in the back of your throat.

You opened the door to see Diggy still standing there against the wall with his eyes closed.

Flashbacks of him taking naps, & how he’d look so peaceful, you always thought he looked so cute asleep. His long dark curled lashes…..your heart fluttered each time, like….now.

Diggy opened his eyes slowly then looked over at you, & down at your bunny slippers, he side smiled at that one. He always used to make fun of you for wearing those around the house all the time.

He followed you inside while he closed the door behind as well,

“I um…” he began while you stood by the doorway waiting for him to actually say something like now, he paused standing close to the door.

“You’re bleeding.” you interrupted, Diggy stopped talking for a minute then he took his left hand to his forehead to press it against where it hurt the most. He flinched with just one touch, you felt kinda bad for him, he took his hand away to see that there was some blood although the cut for the most part was already dry.

“I….might’ve crashed my car….” he spoke quietly, you looked down for a minute,

“Where? Here? Was it just your car? What happened?” You panicked went on to saying,

“Y/N calm down. I was at that one club tonight with Spin, I left early, I drove home...though yeah I’m pretty drunk...ended up at the hotel crashed right into the parking garage wall.” he explained to you, you shook your head now covering your mouth with your hands in shock.

“Oh my gosh Daniel. What hotel?” you asked with a hint of sympathy,

Diggy glanced down at his black kicks. You softly laughed sarcastically, sucking on your teeth,

“So how is she?” you asked, he didn’t even have to tell you the name of the hotel.

“Y/N I didn’t come here to talk about any of that.” Diggy avoided that subject, you just walked away into the kitchen & he followed you.

“How’d you even get here?” you asked getting an attitude already with him, he rolled his eyes, 2 months later you guys picked up right where it ended.

“I walked.” he sat down on a stood near the middle of the island counter. You sat across from him, he then buried his face in his palms tired as ever. You yawned.

“God. How’d you know I’d be home? You know I was at the same spot you were….” you began tapping your fingers on the countertop, that always pist him off, he glared up at you noticing what you were doing, you stopped when he started talking.

“No I didn’t. Although I thought I saw you a couple times at the bar. You cut your hair. I wasn’t sure. I had no clue you’d be home, I just had no where else to go. I didn’t want to stay at the hotel, but yeah...I did see you, flirtin it up with that bartender.” Diggy looked salty as ever when he finished that sentence, you wanted to laugh at that but you just couldn't. You felt kinda dumb for it, because he saw. Not like you even knew he was there.

“Like that fuckin matters Daniel. You coulda just stayed at The Hamptons, I’m sure your lil bitch Chanel coulda patched you up just fine” you snarled at him, he was getting upset with you,

“I just told you I didn’t come here to talk about that hoe, I haven’t talked to her since….” he paused becoming super quiet,

You became quiet too, both of you realized another word would’ve lead into another huge fight & this was the first time you two had seen eachother in forever.

“I never went to The Hamptons when you kicked me out. I never went to go see her. I went home back to Jersey, thats where I been staying. This is literally my first night back in Manhattan since then.” he spoke still quietly, you didn’t know how to respond, because you had no idea.

“You still haven’t told me why you’re here” you looked down wanting to just ignore this all & fall asleep. But you couldn't your heart wouldn’t allow it even if you wanted to. It just wont happen. It can’t.

“Because. I’m drunk. I’m tired. I’ve been fuckin up left & right, I can’t even sleep at night, thats why I’m so tired. I haven’t been in the studio. I crashed my car. I’m bleeding out my head. I got a headache the size of Jupiter. I haven’t spoken to really anyone.” he took a deep breath before continuing on, you sat there listening you began to shiver because you always got nervous with him sometimes….it was only with him though.

“I just wanted you….” he whispered, his voice touched your ears, & your heart burst again. You felt tears fall down to your cheeks, you were so overwhelmed. You looked up at him, his eyes were brown & sad.

“Here I am….drunk. Tired. I haven't been fuckin anybody, I take sleep medicine because I need the rest, & I just bought a new car, I’m not bleeding because my time of the month isn’t for another week or two. But my head is throbbing & before I came back to open the door I threw up.” more tears fell down to your cheeks,

Diggy couldn’t look at you, he knew he screwed up so bad, he felt awful about everything.

“What do you want Digg?” you asked your voice shaky, he avoided eye contact again, it was almost 5 am by this time.

The silence came across you both as it was still dark in the early morning.

“I don’t know.” he whispered.

You just wanted to go to sleep, you yawned then wiped your tears, & just straight out spoke your mind.

“Then I honestly don’t know why you are here. You fucked up Daniel. & You want me to do what? You want my company? I let you in, I’ll give you a bandaid, but I’m tired, & I just needa sleep this off before my hangover gets worse. I want to go to bed, I’m sure there are cabs outside.” you got up from the stool you were sitting on, Diggy did too. You went over to a drawer in the kitchen getting out a bandaid for him, you handed it to him, he looked at it, then slowly took it from your hand. His eyes were so sad, you couldn’t stand to look at them. It hurt.

“Y/N…” he whispered as you two were close while he took the bandage from you, you looked down backing off,

“Goodnight Daniel. Take care.” you walked away hoping he’d just let himself out. You turned away, when you heard the door shut moments after. You fell down to your knees again, sobbing. You knew you just let what seemed to be the biggest part of your world walk out. Again. Your heart shattered this time. You couldn’t comprehend the pain. It was so damn awful. You felt as if you had to vomit again, if this is heartbreak then this is your future from now to forever.

You stood up then wiped your tears, you were about to head upstairs & go cry some more up there when the doorbell rang. You weren’t gonna answer it. But your heart was literally pulling you like strings.

Opening it he stood there, still. His eyes flooded in tears, you could see them on his face.

“It’s late. Y/N I know. I’m tired too. I came here, because I needed to tell you face to face, that I need you. Okay, I need you. Everything has turned to shit, I fucked up, I went against you, when you were always there being my number one supporter, you’ve done so much for me, & I disrespected you more than once. You had every right to kick me out, you have every right to hate me, be mad, I am so sorry Y/N, I hurt you…& that is the worse pain I will ever have to live with. I can’t do this without you girl, please…..I’m tryna run away from all this crazy shit, yet I end up knockin at your door, & I wasn’t even sure if you were gonna answer. You did, & that was enough….because you deserve it. I’m sorry, I miss you & I don’t think I could ever stop. You don’t have to believe any of the words I am saying, or listen to the others, expect that I am so sorry that I thought for a minute there was a girl more important more special than the girl I had a future planned out with. I fucked up. & If I walk away knowing that this is it, I have no regrets, you have meant the world to me, & you have given me a part of a world I don’t want to leave. You will always be my girl……” a tear slid down his cheek.

You couldn’t breathe. You thought you were gonna pass out. You just couldn’t right now, you didn’t even realize the tears falling down your cheeks, you had nothing to say, you really didn’t.

The only thing you could do, was just stand there. Diggy stood still, you both in silence again. You didn’t have to think hard, because you already knew what you were gonna do. But you really had to think because you had to make sure it was the right decision for you. There is nothing selfish about that.

You then just shut it out. Everything you were tryna convince yourself of, & you just let your actions take over.

You looked at him & shrugged crying more then opened your arms & he let another tear fall down, he walked right into you, embrassing eachother never felt so good.

  When you had walked inside the penthouse you stumbled inside kicking your designer heels off & walking with little balance over to the kitchen. While you walked into the darkness of the penthouse you switched on the kitchen lights. While you passed the clock on the oven it read 3 am. You felt the numbness wore off even though you were still faded, you went into the freezer to grab out a pint of pumpkin spice ice cream. You made no hesitation to get a bowl or anything you just ate it right out of the container.

You then slowly pattered over to the living room turning one light on next to the big view window where the record player was placed. You sucked on your spoon full of ice cream searching through all your vinyl records. You took out an old Etta James album, as it began to play you sang along drunk as ever. Then did you set the ice cream aside while you removed your dress. You stood in a little light with your full body on display for whomever was still awake looking into their window, nothing but bra & panties.

Sitting on the couch now eating the ice cream still you kept singing along,

“I heard church bells ringinggg” your voice raspy & loud, you were so out of it. Suddenly the feeling of sorrow hit you again, & tears fell down to your cheeks. You let them fall as you felt sick & lonely.

This was a typical saturday morning.

A very early saturday morning.

  Diggy’s POV:

I opened the door to my car avoiding any stumbling, I turned the ignition on & slid out with ease being as careful as possible. My vision was fucked because it was so fuzzy, but I wasn’t seeing much double. I was praying I’d make it out alright tonight. Though I had no idea where the fuck I was going.

  Diggy impressed himself driving it was unnoticeable really. He turned his stereo system on blasting his music playing PartyNextDoor. He was so focused on staying straight & center, he didn’t realize where he was going anymore its like he was driving blind in a straight line.

The next thing he knew he ended up just making it into the parking garage of the hotel Spin was staying at for the night.

That wasn’t the only thing,

He pressed hard on the gas, hitting the whole front of his vehicle into the wall of the parking garage.

The windshield shattered, for a minute Diggy had no idea what happened. His foot automatically pressed the brake in panic but by that his head smacked right into the steering wheel.

Everything went black.

  Minutes later he whipped his head back realizing what just happened, he put the car into park, then turned it off. He breathed heavily in true shock, his head was pounding hard & he could hear his heartbeat, the music no longer blasting loud.

Again he stumbled out of his vehicle to see his precious black rolls royce was totally destroyed in the front. He shook his head, looking at all the damage, then he looked around to see where the security cameras were, & if he could spot anyone around. Usually security is always on duty especially around 3 am.

Diggy lucked out, then he walked away from the car with the keys in his hands. He entered back outside to the crowd of NYC. When he recognized the hotel while standing outside for a minute, he bit down on his lip.

“Fuck” he whispered under his breath while the sign above read in giant bright white lights, “The Hampton’s”.

He quickly called Spin up still in a panic shock mode, he stood around in fear someone was gonna come up to him or the paparazzi would be out.

“Talk to me” Spin yelled into the phone, Diggy could hear the club pounding into his ear & he couldn’t handle the noise.

“Yeah man. I uh made it to the hotel. Why are we staying at TheHamptons!? You know Chanel still works here man! I’m not about to stay in here. That hoe is still blowin up my cell! Why didn’t you go over this we me!?” Diggy snapped his head hurt like hell, his pulse was in full range of high blood pressure. He thought he might pass out.

“Calm your shit man. I’m just tryna have a good time, take yo ass somewhere else then son! You killin all the vibes! I’m bouta leave soon bring some girls by the place, you wit me or not son?” Spin growled irritated at Diggy

“Naw son. You do whatever you wanna do tonight. Fuck this whole night man.” Diggy muttered,

“You want me to check on your whip before we leave?” Spin tried to not spend too much time on the phone,

“No need. Its crashed into the hotel wall. You’ll see it when yall come thru.” Diggy’s voice faded out as he hung up the phone.

  While Spin was on the other line he flipped realizing what Diggy just meant.

“Shitt” Spin spoke under his breath, all the girls on him began to ask what was wrong trying to comfort him. At this time Spin was thinking what to do, he figured Diggy would be alright but he was making plans to leave until Justice finally showed up with two trays of rounds for everyone.

Girls grabbed shots before Spin took one, Justice was just about to ask Spin about you before Spin interrupted him,

“Thanks bruh, listen can you get the guys up front to bring my whip around?” Spin took down the shot real fast, Justice looked confused,

“Uh...we’d need the keys” Justice began, Spin then laughed taking another shot.

“Nah man I got a driver for that shit, he should be out there waiting” Spin continued to talk on a bunch of nonsense, he was so hammered right now. Justice stood their super confused,

“I don’t really understand what you're asking man, sorry” Justice tried to let him off easy then tried to get him to give you his number.

Spin got up pulling his phone out ignoring whatever Justice was tryna say,

“By the way man. There was this girl in here today, she was up at the bar with me. She said she knows you, her name is Y/N, um...you think you can hook me up with her number?”

Spin looked up at him with his eyes dazed then laughed,

“Ion remember no bitch name, did I sleep with her?” Spin asked, Justice now disturbed continued on, he began to describe you & Spin was actually tryna think about it.

“Y/N?” he thought aloud, then it hit him,

“Y/N! Yeah I know her! She was here!?” Spin started asking Justice questions now, Justice was feeling uncomfortable now,

“Yeah bruh, we was hittin off, so if you got her number or somethin, can you hook me up?” Justice was getting impatient,

“I can’t. Did she know that Diggy was here?” Spin kept on asking, Justice now was just irritated,

“Probably not, why?”

“That’d be her ex nigga!” Spin stammered, then he turned around totally ignoring Justice,

“C’mon yall” Spin motioned his girls over by him as they were getting ready to leave,

“You forreal?” Justice blocked them from tryna leave,

“How you think I know her? Now get the fuck out my way” Spin pushed him then the girls snickered while they all followed behind him leaving the club.

Justice just stood their with one shot left on the tray, he stared at it, then took it down real fast. He was so confused.

You were knocked out by the time the record even finished playing, the ice cream was never finished & it was now sitting out completely melted. The lights continued to remain on now going on 4 am. You woke up at the sound of your doorbell ringing, you woke up scared out of your mind realizing that you’d only been asleep for an hour. You woke up itching your head waking half naked toward the door forgetting about it completely.

As you walked toward the door you totally ignored your phone to check for any messages, you were a little skeptical because of the hour of night/morn, but you approached the door anyway. When you checked the peephole your vision was still messed up & you weren’t able to tell who it was, you recognized the figure, slowly & cautiously you opened the door a peak, hiding yourself behind it when you finally realized you were barely dressed.

Diggy glanced down at his phone, he began seeing double again, he had several missed calls including one from Chanel. Chanel was never a thing, or one time fling, in fact he never ended up having sex with her the night you two broke up. He never did before, although for a moment he thought she was something. He realized he was so wrong. He regretted a lot that had happened but there was nothing or anyone to blame except himself.

The moment he was about to dial your phone number, Spin yelled out from the crowd close to the entrance for Diggy. Alarmed Diggy headed back in right away, Spin looked excited to see Diggy as he greeted him with a bro hug.

“MAN ITS CRAZY! WHERE YOU BEEN THO BRO? NAH FORGET IT MAN, LEMME BUY YOU A ROUND” Spin voiced loudly because of the noise inside the building, Diggy kept telling himself he wasn’t gonna take another drink, but Spin insisted.

“HERE TAKE THIS” Spin handed Diggy over a shot of tequila,

“Bottoms up homie” Diggy raised the shot glass then took it down real fast. He shook his head trying to shake it off, he wasn’t going to make it home alive tonight. When he looked back up Spin was chattin up some cuties, Diggy looked over at the bar where his eyes caught his attention on you. He couldn’t make up the fact if it was you or not. All of a sudden he felt very sick, he stared for a moment. Then still standing he convinced himself that it was an illusion because he was so faded.

“YO BRO, COME MEET BACK OVER BY THE ROPED OFF AREA ORDER US A COUPLE OF ROUNDS” Spin yelled over at Diggy taking the girls he was talking to in his hands. Diggy nodded, Spin too was pretty tipsy.

Diggy watched Spin dissolve into the crowd of people then put his shades back on hoping it could act like a masqe. He wanted so bad but to leave this place.

  “Okay Okay, so if you know the DJ then how come you aren’t up in the VIP area?” Justice asked handing you another cup of just water. You giggled because of how tipsy you were, you took at least 2 shots with him, & 3 of whatever fruity drink he made for you.

“Because I had no idea he was gonna be here tonight, I haven’t talked to him in a while so yeah, he probably wouldn’t have put me on anyway” you laughed taking the water & drinking the whole thing in one. You’re head began to hurt like hell.

“He wouldn’t put you on? Damn. You’re the prettiest girl up in here, If I was him I’d have you VIP everything” Justice flirted with his pretty honey eyes. You looked down at all the empty glasses & just laughed,

“Ima be right back, I just gotta make a run to the restroom real quick” you laughed a little embarrassed, Justice cracked a smile & nodded. You got up easily on your toes standing tall in the heels carefully keeping your balance. Justice smiled watching you walk away, you avoided tipping over & made it to the bathroom successfully.

  Diggy headed over to the bar where Justice was serving up other folks, Diggy pulled him aside when he said he wanted 2 rounds. Justice looked at him in amazement.

“Yeah man I gotchu, dude, Diggy Simmons, how are you man?” Justice asked excited to have the opportunity to meet Digg. Diggy was already irritated enough, he wanted to just melt into the walls at that point.

“I’m good bro I’m good” Diggy nodded looking around to spot if the girl he saw sitting up at the bar was you, when he couldn’t find you in any site he really was convinced it was just an illusion.

“You got any hot tracks comin out soon bruh?” Justice tried to keep a conversation flowing even though he could tell Digg wasn’t feelin it.

Diggy shrugged before responding,

“My nigga I’m just chillin to be real witchu. When you got them rounds ready, they’ll all be expecting them by the DJ booth & VIP section. Thanks man.” Diggy nodded before Justice could even have the chance to respond, he slipped away into the crowd heading over to where Spin was.

You washed your hands while looking at yourself in the mirror. You looked hot tonight, but you didn’t like what you saw. You were a drunk, again & your head hurt like hell. You knew it was about time you called it quits it was already 2 am which seems early but hey, it was only Friday.

You made your way back out to the club area taking each step slowly, when you arrived back at the bar you took a seat again & Justice smiled when he saw you. Before either of you could keep on flirting the one dude who hit on you from earlier in the night came back.

“So you ready to let me buy you a drink yet mami?”

“Listen papi churlo, getcho stank ass away from me, you don’t understand english!? READ MY LIPS, NO! & AS FAR AS I’M CONCERNED NO IS THE SAME IN SPANISH!!” you snapped at the dude,

“Stuck up puta!” he flicked you off, you rolled your eyes at him then he stormed off. Justice looked a little surprised,

“You just gon let that dude off?” he questioned concerned.

“Yeah” you nodded you were very irritated & things were no long fun you didn’t wanna be here anymore.

“I’m gonna go” you nodded your head & got up from the chair quickly, Justice was now lookin confused in the face.

“Why? I get off my shift in another half hour if you just want to wait around? You need water or anything?” he asked trying to get you to stay,

This was what you meant by feeling as if you couldn’t accept any type of comfort or affection from anyone. You just couldn’t, & it wasn’t a thing you liked it was just like that.

You shook your head no,

“What's wrong?” he asked,

“Nothing its just time for me to get goin” you sighed then was ready to make your way out,

“Y/N, you’re drunk. You need me to call a cab, I mean if you wait I can take you home?” he was serious he really wanted you to stay,

“No, I’m good. I can call a cab for myself just like I can hold the door for myself!” you snapped, Justice looked down for a minute, you could see you hurt his feelings a little. He wasn’t bein no punk ass nigga, he just was into you.

“Look, you’re very sweet & I’m glad we got to chat, it’s the most fun I’ve had in a while, but I’m alone for a reason, you don’t wanna get involved with me” you pursed your lips together, Justice grabbed your hand fast before you had a chance to leave, you were taken by surprise.

“Can I at least get your number?” he asked a little flustered,

You sighed,

“Look, I just really wanna go home. If you have the chance pull SpinKing aside & he can hook you up with my number” you began to feel hot & stressed all at once these were just mixed emotions or maybe it was just the alcohol talking.

Justice let go of your hand, with a troubled look on his face, you tried to show some sympathy but you just walked off & out into the New York night, or New York early early morn.

You pulled out your cell as you went to go hail a cab, one was already parked & since no one was waiting around for it you hopped in. The taxi driver began its drive as you told him the address, then you skimmed through your phone feeling bloated, dizzy, tired, & sick. You had lots of text messages from your girlfriends but you just didn’t feel like responding. It was a silent easy ride home you leaned your head against the cab window happy to be heading home.

Within minutes that Diggy had approached Spin back at the VIP area he came to conclusion that he was gonna ditch.

“Whatchu mean you leavin son?” Spin asked aggravated that his friend wasn’t gonna stick around,

“Look bro I’m just not feelin it tonight.” Diggy tried to explain, “I ordered your rounds tho, they’re all on me”

Spin paused for a moment before picking up the conversation again,

“How the hell are you gonna get home? You drove your car didn’t you?”

“Yeah.” Diggy just realized that he took his own car, he very well now knew that he had a slim chance of making it home tonight.

“Digg, you’re drunk, you can’t take the car!” Spin argued in concern, Diggy looked around then back at Spin.

“C’mon man. We’ve driven the car high before, I’ll be okay” Diggy tried to assure Spin, Spin wasn’t gonna argue with Diggy drunk.

“Just call a cab man, we can get the car tomorrow” Spin tried to convince Diggy,

“Alright Alright, I’ll take a fuckin cab” Diggy was more avergated now,

“Call me when you get back to the hotel” Spin got up to hug Diggy.

Then just like yourself, he headed out into the flooding crowd of people he found himself outside.

Diggy’s POV:

I came out tonight to support Spin, he’s got all the hunnies out here wantin to a spin on him. Can’t say I’m not proud of him. I am, its a good night just chillin hangin out with a bunch of girls around us at one of the hottest spots out here. I just don’t know how much longer I can do this. I mean, its crazy I got beautiful women all over me, constantly, I can sleep with whomever I want, these girls beg for it. Spin doesn’t know this, because he thinks I’m with a different girl every night. I’ve been hiding out back at home in Jersey. It’s nice being able to spend a lot of time with my family. But I know what they’re thinking & I know they can see I’m different, & that I’ve changed. I have. & not for the best. I’m very irritated, fidgety, I can’t sleep at night. I’m always tired. I feel like shit. I’m an asshole, & I know it. I’ve been writing, but been avoiding the studio. This is the first time I’ve been out in the city in a long while. Its good to be back. I just wish I could enjoy a little something. Spin & I are supposed to head out to Vegas next week, I’m hoping that will take my mind off of everything. I mean everything. I’m overwhelmed, hoes are always on my dick, it’s just not fun anymore. I’ve been going to church with my family a lot, trying to reconnect myself with God, I’m struggling. & I swear if I’m not trying to fall asleep, I’m up everywhere but Manhattan, drinking myself away. I don’t even remember the night before, & this drink in my cup is gonna make me forget everything I’m saying now. Girls are trying so hard to get with me, they think I’m the shit. Ion talk to any females anymore. I just don’t. Like what the fuck is goin on with me? It’s some bullshit, I feel like shit. I am not the shit. I am no one special. I am in a dark path, & I’ve been puttin on my poker face for 2 months.

  From the VIP section Diggy dressed up in all black quietly sat down on scarlet red couch with groupies dancing on him, whispering in his ears. His black shades hid his eyes which were already faded, he was miserable.

“Hey baby….I was thinkin about slippin out to the bathroom...you wanna come take a little trip wit me real quick?” a girl with big plump red lips whispered in Diggy’s ears. Her breath smelled like strong icy smirnoff & he didn’t like it. He tried to ignore everyone, this was Spin’s night he had to be here. But this was not a party. This was just….awful for him. The girl with her big titties pourin out her tight hoochie mama red leather dress kissed on his ear. Daniel was disgusted & disturbed. He felt uncomfortable to the point he thought he was already drunk because he was about to puke.

Harshly Diggy pushed the girl off of him & got up from the seat, all the girls watched trying to chase after him like wild animals.

“What the fuck man?!?” the girl screamed in anger embarassed about a superstar shutting her down real fast.

Another girl preyed on his arm, he pulled away again & again, just trying to get out the VIP area.

“Let me buy you a drink daddy” a bubble butt blonde winked, Diggy looked at her for a moment thru his shades,

“ ‘Daddy’ can buy his own shit” he snapped, then stormed away, he just felt like walking out of the place. Security hadn’t noticed he walked away, eventually Diggy found himself going through a crowd of crazy drunks & raving people, when he finally saw he was close to the bar. He wanted something real strong at the moment, & he wasn’t sure if he was gonna make out tonight….he just wasn’t sure.

“So you’re sayin you know the DJ?” Justice asked you smiling as he continued to stir other drinks for people, while keeping up a conversation with you.

You nodded with no drink in your hand, it felt nice to actually have a real conversation with a complete stranger & not be toasted already.

“Hmmph. So why you here alone, where your girls at?” Justice asked now focusing on you,

You laughed a little bit embarrassed, avoiding any red blushing, you licked your lips sly, & answered,

“It’s just me, myself, & I right now” you pressed your hand on your cheek to rest.

Justice looked down & kind v'e side smiled.

“Thats alright, you just came out to have some fun, right?” Justice smiled trying to cheer you up a little, I’m sure he could sense there was more to the story than what you had spoken, obviously.

You laughed, & nodded in agreement, at that moment you hadn’t noticed a very irritated & faded Daniel walked passed you without even noticing you.

Diggy thought about ordering a drink from the bar, but he thought it be best if he went out to get some air first, he dashed out feeling as if he was going to puke any moment, trying to avoid everyone, when he reached the outside, he breathed heavily, as if he was having an anxiety attack. He looked up just trying to breathe, girls noticed him, but security quickly pushed them back when they realized it was Diggy. He sighed, beaming his eyes left & right, thinking about just hailing a taxi & going any fucking where but here. He was dizzy, & he couldn’t tell if it was the alcohol or just himself going insane

You continued to chat up with Justice,

“So, since you came here to have fun, why don’t I make you a drink that’ll get your spirits up” he grinned hoping you’d accept,

You sighed, you knew you should stop drinking, but what was wrong with a drink from the nice bartender?

“Hmm, I guess...you realize I’m be real fucked up soon tho if I keep on takin on these drinks” you smiled with a little flirt at the tip of your tongue, you surprised yourself.

“Its all good baby, I’ll call you a cab if you need to, you won’t have to worry” Justice smiled back assuring you, everything would be okay.

You wanted to trust him, but now it all seemed sketchy, however he was cute, so if you ended up in his bed tonight I guess it wouldn’t be that big of deal.

But you’re heart just began to beat very fast, you soon became hotter & hotter, you remembered that you’re heart hurt….& this could only hurt more, even if you were too fucked up to remember,

Biting down on your tongue now, you nodded okay.

Diggy ended up going across the street to a regular sports bar to get himself a drink. No one there seemed to recognize him. Expect a young girl & her family, she approached him very slowly, with a little smile on her sweet face, she had to be 12 maybe, Daniel knew he was just about done at this point after he drank a Stella. He doesn’t even like beer of any sort.

“Diggy, could you sign this for me please?” the tween walked up to him with a paper napkin in her hand. Daniel looked frightened, how could he? He was fucked up in front of a fan, he felt so ashamed, so guilty, looking at the little girl in his eyes he removed his glasses.

There was no explanation, but his eyes began to burn, & he could feel tears well up in his eyes.

The young girl could see that there was something wrong, Diggy licked his lips then nodded his head he took the napkin from the little girl,

He pulled a pen out from his leather jacket pocket,

“What’s your name sweetheart?” he asked still able to speak words fully, his vision was just doubled.

“Rayan” she side smiled, curious to know exactly what was going on with one of her favorite artists,

Diggy bit down on his lip about to write with the pen, when he saw two napkins floating in the air, & he just couldn’t write anything out. He paused & she saw,

“What's wrong Diggy?” she asked meekly truly concerned for him, Diggy sighed,

“I made a big mistake babygirl, & I don’t think I can fix it.” he sniffled, while tears fell down to his cheeks, Rayan made no hesitation but she got closer & although she stood at 5 feet, she went out to give him a hug. Diggy made no hesitation at all either, he held her back, trying to control the tears.

Rayan’s family watched from a distance completely confused, as they watched their daughter hug a superstar.

Diggy then let go, & crouched down so he was at her level, she wiped his tears off his face, Diggy didn’t know what to even say, he was so touched, he’d never felt this experience with a fan before.

“Listen Rayan, I’m so sorry sweetie. I’m gonna be honest with you, I’ve been a real jerk, & you really don’t want my autograph, I’ve let down a lot of people lately, I’m not in a good stage right now” Diggy looked at the girl in her eyes, she wore her hair straight with little butterfly earrings on. He side smiled,

“I love you. You may think you’re a jerk, & you may think you’ve messed up, but I’m your fan. & I’m not gonna leave your side.” she smiled softly at him, Diggy glanced at the ground real quick then back at the angel.

“You are by far the cutest fan I’ve ever met. I love you & the fans too, very much. & I appreciate everything you just told me. You’re very nice” he smiled, Rayan giggled,

“I think you should apologize…& make it right…..not with us, or me, but to her….” Rayan’s voice was real soft at this point, Diggy knew exactly who ‘her’ was….he wanted to cry all over again. He was fucked up. & He fucked up.

He nodded his head at her, then licked his lips.

“You know what Rayan, I can’t personally write you out an autograph right now, however this jacket is making me super hot, & it’s honestly one of my favorites, but…” he paused removing it from himself, Rayan’s eyes lit up,

“I want you to have it” he smiled placing the jacket around Rayan, her face lit up she was so excited she had no idea what to say.

She hugged him again, & he hugged her back,

“Thank you so much!” she grinned wide at him, Diggy laughed at the joy in her, for the first time in a long two months, someone tore down Diggy’s wall he had built up, & she was only 12.

“Thank you sweetheart, you just helped me figure out my next step” he winked & smiled at her, her smile was warm, “do you live here in the city?” he asked,

Rayan nodded her head as she kept getting more excited,

“Well, I’m thinking that maybe this week I can take you out for lunch, you think you’d be interested?” he continued to smile, her eyes got big real fast, she nodded her head very fast, Diggy smiled more,

“Alright, we can make that happen, is that your family over there?” Diggy looked over at her parents who were a little shocked, & anxious to know what was going on, she nodded, then she walked him over to her family. Although Diggy was very well intoxicated he was able to concentrate & stay professional in front of Rayan’s family. Her parent’s were very excited for their daughter & to meet Diggy, they agreed that Diggy would come pick Rayan up, in a limo, & take her out to Serendipity a cute family styled restaurant tomorrow afternoon.

Daniel thanked his fan, & her family, then slipped out of the sports bar & head back out into the New York City air. He felt good although his vision was fuzzy he was able to walk across & back over to the club. Still a long line of people waiting to get into the club strung out, Diggy quietly made his way back in fast, he entered the crowd slowly realizing that he needed to go back outside to make a phone call.