@diffractal : ā fine, keep acting like you hate me. ā
deep down, he knew many of his insecurities eclipsed his many life choices. there will never be a moment in which his moods haven't gotten the best of him. especially in times where he neededĀ supportĀ than scalding truth. right now, kaveh wanted to turn deaf to the comments the other has admitted. he knows his drinking has always been a problematic habit of his. he knows he will one day have to kill this addiction. he hates the way alĀ -Ā haitham looks at him sometimes, it always made kaveh feelĀ . . .Ā lesser. disappointed in himself, more than anything, that bitterness brews often within the cage of his chest. in this moment, he can't quite look the other in the eye.
"Ā i bet you'dĀ likeĀ that,Ā wouldn'tĀ you?Ā "Ā his reddened face twists,Ā "Ā makes yourĀ life s'much easier to deal with,Ā "Ā he hates talking like this, when his words slur together and proves people right. that heĀ can'tĀ keep himself in line, that he doesn't have himself quite put together as he wishes he did.Ā "Ā get outĀ already!Ā "Ā kaveh finally says, fed up with having to be soĀ seenĀ under those eyes, and he tosses a pillow andĀ failsĀ to make an impact when he lobs it. it fell not too far from where he remained seated. that only upsets him even more, and remains defeated when the architect drops his weight on the plush cushion of his bed. a pitiful tone clings to his voice when he speaks again,Ā "Ā justĀ leave me aloneĀ -Ā "Ā let him hide away and sober up with the help of theseĀ terribly dark thoughts.