#dieobrien

pooor bb

DONT I KNOW IT 

AND LMAO AFTER I MADE THAT POST I WENT AND TEXTED HIM AND HE DIDNT ANSWER UNTIL THIS MORNING LMAO HE PROBABLY THINKS IM GROSS AND DESPERATE 

whyyyyyyy :(

oh myg od this is going to be a long post but i have a lot of feelings rn 

so like 

lemme preface this by saying that he is the first boy i've ever considered properly dating???? like i've thought boys were cute/funny/etc and i thought i was in love with marius but actually wasn't and whenever i think about being asked out i'm like nah relationships aren't my thing but he makes me think i could deal with relationships being my thing????? idk this has never happened before 

and we were in the musical together and during rehearsals we'd go out in the audience and lay down and play 2048 on his phone and there were a lot of moments where i thought he might like me and then some of my friends said they thought he might've asked me to prom if my other friend hadn't and then a few days after the musical ended he texted me and we talked a lot and then over spring break we literally texted all day every day like past midnight most nights and it was awesome and a lot of times during that week i thought he might like me idk 

but the boy who likes me (the boy who i went to prom with) is good friends with him and so i feel like even if he does like me he won't ask me out because his friend likes me and that's a dick move 

and lately i've noticed that whenever we text i'm always the one who starts the conversation and i usually send more messages and shit and then i started worrying if i'm annoying him and like my best guy friend has this girl who won't stop texting him but he's too nice to stop talking to her and of course i compared that situation to my own and i'm completely terrified that i'm annoying the shit out of the boy i'm texting and that he's also too nice to stop talking to me 

and before prom he found out that i didn't have any plans for after prom and he invited me to come with his group if the girl in charge of everything said yes but then at the end of prom he didn't say anything to me about it so i just went to ihop with my friend and it turned out that's where his group was going so he invited the two of us to sit with them but idk if it was out of pity or because he actually wanted us there and idk i'm worried that his friends think i'm weird and idk what his friends know about me or if he's told them anything idk didk di idi kdk d kk kkkk 

oh and speaking of prom i went up to him at one point and was like 'next slow song you're dancing with me' but that didn't happen and i am hella embarrassed because i said that to him in front of one of his friends 

and i haven't really spoken to him since because i've been embarrassed and worried that i annoy him but i saw him today at our beta club meeting and he really didn't speak to me either?????? like didn't really say hello or anything except to tell me that the boy who likes me was looking for me and fuv ckcc 

all i can think about is that in a few weeks he's graduating and then it's summer and then he's going off to college and i am so sad i am soso so o ososoos  sad 

i just

wait omg I didn’t say an au and the au is in a modern high school

"What are you wearing?" James asked his girlfriend incredulously while eying her up and down in confusion.

Lily was dressed in a tie-dye maxi dress that, admittedly, wasn’t too flattering on her being it was three sizes too big, causing her to roll up the bottom of the dress and pin it.

"It’s Earth Day and the student council made us all wear ‘hippie’ outfits. Isn’t that just groovy?" She responded sarcastically, rolling her eyes.

Jet Lag - Simple Plan ft. Natasha Bedingfield

Eleanor Rigby - The Beatles

Sad - Bo Burnham

Scar - Missy Higgins

Stay Beautiful - Taylor Swift

Stay The Night - James Blunt