#didnos

NOS is a term the Hive gave me that means “NOt a System.” The community’s term for it will not be used on this blog (feel like I gotta say this for a while).

Just want to clarify before anyone continues reading that these are merely things I have come to understand from my relationship with the Hive thus far (eight-ish months now?) and the words from other systems I’ve seen on YouTube or via Tumblr.

Systems are more often than not uncomfortable when other people can witness them switch. So to circumvent that, if you notice your friend/family member/partner switching, turn your gaze elsewhere unless they say it’s alright!

If it’s in public, perhaps causing a subtle distraction away from their person could give them a moment of privacy, but please be careful not to make tons of noise or cause alarm, as that could startle or trigger the system and whoever is trying to front.

Sometimes switching can be slow, and it’s essential to be patient and let it pass, meaning don’t wave your hand in their face, don’t incessantly call their names, don’t touch them unless you know who is leaving and who is fronting and you have BOTH of their permissions to touch them while switching, don’t snap your fingers at them (God, literally do that to anyone), and don’t get impatient if it takes longer than you would like it to. You should respect the system and give the space, time, and comfort they need if possible.

Maybe the system would like to leave the room, or lie down or they need to be in the dark. Whatever they need in order for this to feel safe, easy, and relaxing. Please just let them, because I’m told it’s always a hard process and it leaves them feeling dissociated and dizzy, often giving them headaches. Switching can happen anywhere at any time, and it takes a LOT of effort to stop or put it off, so just support your friend/family member/partner and give them what they need.

Sometimes switching is fast, or even unnoticeable and suddenly another alter is fronting. That’s okay, too!! And when it happens, don’t complain how you weren’t done talking to X, don’t be upset with the current alter for fronting (sometimes fronting isn’t even voluntary), and by God DO NOT TRY TO TRIGGER SOMEONE ELSE OUT UNLESS YOU HAVE THE SYSTEM’S PERMISSION TO DO SO. Imagine being forced into a conversation that was stressing you out and you’re suddenly wearing someone else’s skin and face, you don’t feel right in your body and it’s extremely uncomfortable and even terrifying because you don’t know what’s going on.

When there is a switch happening, you be patient, welcoming, and understanding. Anything else and you’re risking a bad situation and possibly breaking trust. Ah, one thing I neglected to mention is that every system is unique in function and therefore should be asked on what and how they need to be treated during moments like this.

If I find out any more then I’ll be adding to this post in the future. If any systems or partners of systems would like to inform me of something I’m unaware of or wrong about, that is always welcome! For now, here are some of the main sources I learned from:

Spending time with the Hive

@dissociadid‘s YouTube video How to React to a Switch

You’re not annoying anyone sweetie! It’s wonderful that you wanna know more about it, I’ll do my best to explain the basics that I’m aware of. :) However, I only know a bit more about DID than the other two, so I’ll link some sites that might be able to help more with that.

There are TWs (trigger warnings) ahead so continue reading at your own expense.

DID (dissociative identity disorder) and OSDD (other specified dissociative disorder) are both subparts to some form of PTSD (post traumatic stress disorder). DIDNOS (dissociative identity disorder not otherwise specified) is the former title to OSDD, like how MPD (multiple personality disorder) was the former title for DID. The traumas causing these disorders could range from anything between abuse to natural disasters to car crashes.

With DID specifically, the internet seems a bit confused on the ages it can form. Most of the research studies and textbooks I peruse say it can form before the age of eight (8), while a few others (and people online) claim it to be between six (6) and nine (9). Some of the main symptoms of it are that two (2) or more distinct identities (most commonly called alters) are present in an individual, sometimes taking control (called fronting) of the body. To be very clear, none of the alters associated with DID are harmful, unlike popularly portrayed in movies and novels. There are alters that are more aggressive, but if anyone is to be harmed, it is most likely their own body (because of their role). The alters collectively are referred to as a “system,” and most (from what I see online) systems prefer to be called one, and even have special names for themselves (such as The Hive System!).

OSDD (formerly known as DIDNOS), from what I know, is where people who show some but not all symptoms of DID fall into. There are two categories, OSDD-1a (when a system is lacking a few characteristic alters of DID) and OSDD-1b (when a system’s alters are lacking the characteristic amnesia of DID). These disorders are slightly less complex than DID, but significantly more complex than other dissociative disorders like borderline personality disorder, posttraumatic stress disorder, or complex posttraumatic stress disorder.

Here’s where I got some of my info, in case you wanna look around more:

http://did-research.org/comorbid/dd/osdd_udd/did_osdd.html

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/conditions/dissociative-identity-disorder-multiple-personality-disorder (however I suggest finding actual studies to read up on, not just popular media sources as info tends to get spun, you could read from their sources though!)

I didn’t read through these ones but I looked at the sources and thought they seemed credible (double check me of course!):

http://traumadissociation.com/osdd

https://information.pods-online.org.uk/what-is-dissociative-disorder-not-otherwise-specified-ddnos/

I hope that very glossy and short explanation of them both helped you understand it a bit better. Here are some other dissociative blogs we follow who could probably help explain things better:

@thelabyrinthsystem​​

@dissociadid​​

@alter-madness​​​

And some YouTube channels:

MultiplicityAndMe

Acrylic and Aether

(DissociaDID has a channel too!)

Dysphoria isn’t exactly uncommon in systems, and the Hive is no exception, unfortunately. While there are some that I can’t help with, there are some that I can. I am in need of a pair of wings.

Does anyone know where to find good quality wings? Whether it be from a costume set or custom made, I just need somewhere to look for an alter.

Any help is appreciated.