#devotedheartchapter1

“I don’t see why I can’t just... camp out at Hogwarts or something. Or perhaps the sanctity of my own home. I’m not exactly in the Witness Protection Program, you know where I live,” Severus said as he stared at Dumbledore. 

“You gave me your word, Severus. You’re going to stay here with us in Grimmauld Place where I can keep an eye on you. It will be much easier to convey information if you’re under the same roof. Neither of us will have to travel to the other to give reports. It’s the same theory for you working at Hogwarts with me. Don’t you want to keep up the illusion of your loyalty to the Dark Lord? Your deception of me?”

“Yes, but... that’s not the issue I’m facing with this scenario,” Severus muttered. He felt like a petulant child not getting a turn on the swing. At least, Albus made him feel like that. He always felt fucking small around him. Around anyone. 

“I know what the issue is and you’re just going to have to get over it,” Albus said bluntly, looking at the man with absolutely no empathy whatsoever. “Come, I’m going to teach you how to undo the wards. You’ve stalled enough.”

Severus scoffed under his breath. As if he didn’t know how to undo these wards. Though Albus made them himself, Severus was a master at breaking codes and protective charms. This was no different. He had figured it out weeks ago, just like he figured out the location of their hideout. He, of course, hadn’t come forward with that information, because he’d learned his lesson last time he did that. He didn’t need yet another target on Lily’s back. He thought they were going to be living in Godric’s Hollow, but apparently not. That had not been something he wanted to hear mere steps from the front door. Not to mention he didn’t want to see James Potter with a ring on his finger or their spawn. He’d gotten more detail than he wanted from Dumbledore about the kid. 

“Are you paying attention?” Dumbledore asked, looking over at him. 

“Yes,” Severus lied. No, but he’d be able to do it with his eyes closed. He watched, uninterested, as Dumbledore told him the incantation. Severus repeated it with the desired results, earning him a smile from his old professor. Perhaps this wasn’t such a good idea. Maybe he was better off taking his chances with the Dark Lord. 

He wanted to do the right thing. Really, he did. It was just going to be a long road ahead. He hadn’t been near Lily in a few years, and now he would be around her all the time... plus her husband and newborn baby. 

Kill him now. 

If she didn’t do it first.