#destinedreturn

destinedreturn ha detto: ‘ i drank three mountain dews while you were gone. ’

* wild shit starters

[ XX ] || Pick My Muse Up

Well. Finding someone who was nearly as big as him actually took him by surprise, and enough so that he was just lifted like he weighed nothing? Zikom couldn’t bring himself to struggle immediately.

Ask my character about their life as a child.

Briefly, his mind goes to being surrounded by others his age, by caretakers and tutors, by the laughter and the cruel words, the instances of being deemed unstable and a failure, how any who was tasked with dealing with him was considered unlucky and pitied for their burden... (Any time he was as close to alone as any child of his kind could be was because of self-isolation, for purposeful, self-inflicted isolation was better than the unending torment elsewhere, wasn't it?)

"Well..."

Then, it leaps forth a fair number of years to where he was no longer considered a child (more accurately, finally deemed to be of some kind of potential use to someone--maybe) but still so incredibly young, left completely and utterly alone in the ruins of what was once thriving fields, forests, lakes--

Everything was as cold and dead as a discarded corpse (Which he still remembers seeing, and whilst never having been as close to North, East was still terrified at the sight of the body -- and West, beautiful West, with wit sharper than any blade and kindness unmatched by nearly any other, had been much of the same, blood matting her hair and her skin frigid to the touch).

He can’t even begin to think of the ways South and the Daikaioh were taken, their lives and energy alike stolen from them, and how he was left as the sole survivor.

How he hated it, how he pleaded with the silence to return them all, how he would’ve gladly exchanged his life if it had meant they would be allowed to live, how he was frightened beyond belief to be alone, the closest thing he had ever know to a caring family and those whose trust in and fondness for him couldn’t be doubted ripped away so easily, quickly, carelessly...

He remembers how he had collapsed upon the ground and begged for death to take him too, so he wouldn’t be so horrifically, completely and utterly alone.

But he can give voice to none of it, because it doesn’t matter, nor does he. 

Be quiet, cease your horrid whining, nobody cares, nobody wants to hear it, nobody else should ever have to share your burdens, you have no right to complain, shut up shut up SHUT UP--