#desterto

When he entered the foyer, where the buzz and excitement that only continued to grow from the others, Allen wasted no time in joining in with them and freeing the gift from 'Santa' that was addressed to him from the paper wrapping. And how exciting it was to recieve a new book, how joyful his face was! Immediately, he scampered off back to his room to fully indulge himself in the pages binded between the covers, intending to fully enjoy the story it holds.

                       ....

Teacher will come to gauge Allen's opinion to the book, and become discouraged by the lack of reaction.

It wasn't like he didn't understand it, nor was he unable to appreciate its literary skill and prose. It was amazing how Anderson was able to write a heart-wrenching story of a poverty-ridden young girl dreaming for a sweeter happiness and reaching out to it, only to be found dead in the morning -- all compacted in only a few words. He didn't mind that it was a tragic story either, he was well aware of just how cruel of a place the world can be, was always willing to keep an open mind about any facet of anything given to him. It was just... well, he couldn't really connect with it. If he ever had any kind of misfortune present in his life, he couldn't remember it. If he ever had any sort of parental warmth in his life, he couldn't look back on it. If anything, it made him feel somewhat bitter, resentful feelings over how incredibly empty he was compared to everyone else in the orphanage. But surely, not enough for him to begrudge the one who gave him the book in the first place, as it was certain they only meant for the best intentions in mind. But regardless of the sort, he couldn't really make himself like it.

So the book was slipped between the books that filled his shelves, not a word was commented about it, if only so that he'd avoid offending his benefactor.

He was a year older now since then, has learnt a lot more things since then,  experienced more things that he shouldn't have, and had a lot more time since then to reflect on it and the implications that came with it.

It was only now that he was able to appreciate the story.

Because rather than a story to connect to.... Teacher intended to tell him an aspect about himself, didn't he? Flipping through the pages some time ago, he only realized how much the story reminded him of Teacher. (Or at least, how his thoughts were reflected from the notebook scraps in his world...) Maybe he was just being silly, that he was over-thinking things, but the thought simply won't leave his mind now that it had entered. Perhaps if it was addressed from the actual sender than the fictitious 'Santa Claus', maybe he would've gotten the message much more sooner.

How nice it would've been had Allen just shared his thoughts about the book to Teacher back then, wonder how that conversation would have gone. Even if he would say that he didn't like the book, at least a chat about it would've been better than simply turning a cold shoulder. (Even if he didn't intend for that, not at all.)