This picture feels like it should be a joke, but it isn't. So here's my ideas for the names of higher order derivatives of position:

7. Teehee

8. Jizz

9. Velocity 2: Electric boogaloo

10. Velocity 3: Return of the King

11. David

12. Noodle soup

13. The 12th derivative of acceleration

𝐁𝐄𝐂𝐀𝐔𝐒𝐄 𝐈𝐓 𝐆𝐄𝐓𝐒 𝐅𝐑𝐄𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐋𝐘 𝐀𝐒𝐊𝐄𝐃 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐂𝐀𝐍 𝐂𝐇𝐄𝐂𝐊 𝐌𝐘 𝐏𝐀𝐈𝐃 𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐕𝐈𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐇𝐄𝐑𝐄!.

If you want to know more about what your friends may gossip about you check your ascendant, (the 11th house rules over friends, and the 3rd house rules over gossip, counting 2 houses from the 11th house since we used it as our rising it will fall directly on the ascendant).

𝐍𝐎𝐓𝐄: 𝐅𝐈𝐑𝐒𝐓 𝐎𝐅 𝐀𝐋𝐋 𝐎𝐇 𝐆𝐎𝐃 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐍𝐊 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝟐,𝟓𝐤 𝐅𝐎𝐋𝐋𝐎𝐖𝐄𝐑𝐒, 𝐒𝐞𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐢 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐞 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐢𝐭 𝐭𝐮𝐫𝐧𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐮𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐚𝐜𝐜𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐭𝐞!, 𝐥𝐢𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐢 𝐰𝐚𝐬 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐝 𝐛𝐥𝐨𝐰𝐧!, 𝐚𝐥𝐬𝐨 𝐈 𝐜𝐡𝐞𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐲 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐥𝐞𝐭 𝐦𝐞 𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐥 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐢𝐭 𝐜𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐤𝐞𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐰𝐚𝐲, 𝐝𝐞𝐫𝐢𝐯𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐲 𝐢𝐬 𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢’𝐯𝐞 𝐛𝐞𝐞𝐧 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐢𝐭 𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐥𝐲.

𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒/𝐀𝐑𝐄𝐈𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟏,𝟏𝟑,𝟐𝟓) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They may believe that you are quite rebellious, bold, very confident, outgoing and active, you may also be sporty, energetic, masculine (even if you’re a woman) hotheaded and maybe you have a foul mouth!, sorry not sorry, but they feel like you cuss a-lot and give no care to anything other than yourself, they may feel that your a bit selfish, aggressive/impulsive or immature sometimes, but at the same time you are a go getter, and you may be the reason your friend group is always winning!.

𝐓𝐀𝐔𝐑𝐔𝐒/𝐓𝐀𝐔𝐑𝐔𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟐,𝟏𝟒,𝟐𝟔) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: You may be known to have a charming voice, they may say something about the way you sing or talk (positive or negative depends on the aspects), your food or your taste in general, your wealth and financial status, they say that you have strong values and morals, you are quite pretty and dependable, also very chill and relaxed maybe even lazy, patient, possessive and stubborn!.

𝐆𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈/𝐆𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐍𝐈 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟑,𝟏𝟓,𝟐𝟕) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: You’re quite intelligent and playful, they may speak about the languages you learned or your school education, your car or transportation you take, even your neighborhood and the place you live in, the community you’re from, they may say that you are witty, playful, multi talented, very curious adaptable and strong minded, and comical, you have a very interesting sense of humor that not many understand also quite youthful and maybe maybe nosy💁🏻‍♀️.

𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑/𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐂𝐄𝐑 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟒,𝟏𝟔,𝟐𝟖) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They may speak about your roots, home, your mother, your kids, your house, the goods you bake or food you make, they say that you are emotionally intelligent, you may be known for being quite feminine, sensitive and even being a crybaby who shows their emotions a-lot, you are quite cautious and sensitive to energies around you, your are known for being defensive and family oriented!.

𝐋𝐄𝐎/𝐋𝐄𝐎 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟓,𝟏𝟕,𝟐𝟗) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They may speak about your hair, your art and your confidence, they speak about your short term lovers, places you like to go to, and maybe even your fame!, you are gossiped about a-lot, but your are known for being loyal, very very creative, a bit dramatic and very prideful.

𝐕𝐈𝐑𝐆𝐎/𝐕𝐈𝐑𝐆𝐎 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟔,𝟏𝟖) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They gossip about your health, physique, mental health, your daily routine, the books you read, you’r writing, your pets!, you’re known for being a bit critical, (also their gossip is more about criticism) humble, overthinking, very perfectionist, analytical, logical and judgmental, also they may speak about your job.

𝐋𝐈𝐁𝐑𝐀/𝐋𝐈𝐁𝐑𝐀 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟕,𝟏𝟗) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They may say that you are very romantic, a lovesick person, very attractive too, they talk about your partners/spouse, your business, your fashion style, and your choice of clothes, they also may say that you’re a bit indecisive and can’t make a choice!.

𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐏𝐈𝐎/𝐒𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐏𝐈𝐎 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟖,𝟐𝟎) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They hardly find things to gossip about you, but be careful because most of those who gossip are your enemies in hiding because their gossip stems from jealousy and envy, so be carful and don’t share your secrets with just anyone you call a friend, they may use them against you and they can’t stay hidden for long, (having gemini on 8th house basically adds to this theory) your secrets may be used as a source of gossip, your sexual lifestyle, money, deaths in your family, but at the same time they may say that you are loyal, powerful, brave and have a very strong mindset, mysterious and seductive, very secretive, obsessive or controlling or manipulative!.

𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐒/𝐒𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟗,𝟐𝟏) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: They say you are lucky!, they may speak about your religion, higher education, the family of your future spouse, the adventurous you make, even places where you travel, you are known for being very humorous, also knowledgeable/wise/philosophical, successful, wealthy and honest, the negative side is that they may say that you are a bit unreliable, arrogant, and honest/blunt/straightforward.

𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐍/𝐂𝐀𝐏𝐑𝐈𝐂𝐎𝐑𝐍 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟏𝟎,𝟐𝟐) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: Man they speak about you so openly, and their gossip may easily affect your reputation, but they respect you a lot at the same time, they speak about your job, the hardships you went through, your responsibilities, your father and your career in general, you are mature, and you have a very strong work ethic, just like the scorpio AC people may actually fear talking about you, they talk about your social status, your success, they also say you’re a bit detached, cold, hardworking, you have a one track mind!, a bit anxious but at the same time self disciplined.

𝐀𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐒/𝐀𝐐𝐔𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐔𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟏𝟏,𝟐𝟑) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: now now now, this is a bit funny but your friends speak about the Friends you have!, they may speak about your wealth too, usually Aquarius AC tend to be care about their social media accounts very much so they may talk about you on social media, the type to screenshot your instagram stories for example and take them as gossip material (you may not relate to this if you have strong 4th,8th,12th house placements, or being a moon/pluto dominant since you'll be more private!.) they may say that you're very friendly, clever, weird, very independent and quite unique unpredictable, and rebellious.

𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐒/𝐏𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐆𝐑𝐄𝐄𝐒 (𝟏𝟐,𝟐𝟒) 𝐎𝐍 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐀𝐍𝐓: You may want to read the first 2 lines from the scorpio AC one, now they may talk about your past, your spiritual side, and yes they gossip about your secrets, but you are known for being sensitive, idealistic/delusional, creative and inspiring, hypnotic, very charming and sensitive like a siren!.

𝐃𝐈𝐒𝐂𝐋𝐀𝐈𝐌𝐄𝐑: 𝐄𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐡 𝐢𝐬𝐧’𝐭 𝐦𝐲 𝐧𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐯𝐞 𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞, 𝐬𝐨𝐫𝐫𝐲 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐲 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫/𝐬𝐩𝐞𝐥𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐦𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞𝐬 + 𝐈’𝐦 𝐧𝐨𝐭 𝐚 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐟𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐚𝐥 𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐥𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐫 𝐬𝐨 𝐤𝐢𝐧𝐝𝐥𝐲 𝐭𝐚𝐤𝐞 𝐓𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐨𝐫𝐲 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐚 𝐩𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐡 𝐨𝐟 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐭.

Let's learn a fun technique to read your spouse from your birth chart.

We are going to use this chart here as our birth chart.

now, let's create derivative version of this. each house will essentially jump 7 ahead to make up the spouse for this person. keep in mind to also keep any planets contained within each house to the new derivative chart. it goes like that:

ascendant: Scorpio > 7th house Scorpio

2nd house: Sagittarius > 8th house Sagittarius

3rd house: Capricron > 9th house Capricorn

4th house: Aquarius > 10th house Aquarius

5th house: Pisces > 11th house Pisces

6th house: Aries > 12th house Aries

7th house: Taurus > 1st house/ Rising in Taurus

8th house: Gemini > 2nd house Gemini

9th house: Cancer > 3rd house Cancer

10th house: Leo > 4th house Leo

11th house: Virgo > 5th house Virgo

12th house: Libra > 6th house Libra

Now let's read the symbolic chart for the spouse, which would reveal their attributes and nature:

1st house Taurus

ruled by venus so may appear soft, sensual, calm. taurus is less about glam but about natural, since the sign is earthy but ruled by venus itself, so still very aesthetic, but in a calm way.

2nd house Gemini (moon, vertex)

talks a lot about emotions and practical matters. in fact, sees emotions as a practical matter. vertex is karma and moon is emotions, female. so she has some lessons with communication with females as part of her karma. could also be related to how she would make money.

3rd house Cancer

communication makes her feel home and safe. communicates with emotional intelligence, takes it personally. also learns best when she is emotionally invested somehow. 3rd house is also inner circle, so she could be very protective of her siblings. makes a lot of short trips either to feel a familiar place, or to visit a close family relative. cancer is a water sign, so could also be she goes to the sea or river nearby.

4th house Leo (south node)

south node is where we detach from. she will have to detach from home to find her own identity. also shows she had lessons as early as childhood and/or with parents.

5th house Virgo (lillith)

creative expression is somewhat unconventional, or goes against expectations of society.

6th house Libra

her habits, routine and line of work would be related to themes of venus. could spend many daily activities pursuing this libra energy.

7th house Scorpio

this spouse wants binding, loyal love. fleeting relations cannot work here at any stage.

8th house Sagittarius (pluto)

super strong intuition about people's motives. she went through transformative relationships before meeting him. can be fascinated with aspects of hidden knowledge such as psychology occult sciences etc.

9th house Capricorn (neptune, uranus)

she has unconventional beliefs. neptune here shows she will be fascinated with foreign cultures, languages and travel and capricorn shows she will pursue it seriously.

10th house Aquarius (jupiter, north node, venus)

unconventional line of work or career. could be linked to innovation and technology, research. education and humanities or humanitarian tendencies could also be reflected here.

with jupiter here, the spouse would ultimately be teaching or mentoring. she will be publicly recognized.

north node simply shows that career is her life purpose and she wants to contribute to society as a result.

11th house Pisces (sun mercury mars)

very imaginative and dreamy. since the stellium with all personal planets is here, she has a lot of aspirations and different friends. sicne its pisces the aspirtions would be creative and artistic and the friends could be foreign too (12th house sybolizes foreign countries). could also be an humanitarian and this is part of her identity.

12th house Aries (saturn)

saturn here in 12th shows she struggles quietly, related to confidence (aries) and self doubt.

other things seen from this chart:

7th lord (scorpio: mars) in 11th house (with mercury and sun)

she might meet him through technology/community. it will be related to communication and someone will shine. could even be symbolic, their identities will be in the front somehow.

10th lord (aquarius: saturn, uranus) in 12th/9th

her work includes themes of research, studies or foreign lands/creativity. she might have to be there as part of her job, like business trips or research abroad etc.

2nd lord (gemini: mercury) in 11th

her gains/wealth comes from themes of 11th house: communities, innovation, aspirations. could work as part of a community or contribute to community in order to make money.