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Denzel: Dad? Could you beat up word girl?
Cloud: What? I would rather be friends with word girl.
Denzel: So you're saying you couldn't take her?
Cloud: I wouldn't be fighting her; we both protect our respective planets. I protect the real world and she protects her fictional world.
Denzel: Just say out loud to me that you could beat her up.
Cloud: Go to your room, Denzel.
Denzel: Fine. *Leaves*
Cloud: He gets that from you.
Tifa: *crying laughter*
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Happy Mother's day, Tifa.
Cloud: *Lays out stationary, toys, and blocks. Sets Denzel in front of them*
Tifa: What are you doing?
Cloud: The test.
Denzel: *crawls past the things Cloud laid out*
Cloud: No! Pick one!
Denzel: Papa! *Crawls all the way up to Cloud*
Cloud: I didn’t realize I was an option…
Tifa: Are you crying?
Cloud: No… *Picks up his son*
Tifa: Are you lying?
Cloud: Yes.
Tifa: *coos at both her boys*
Cloud: S-shut up.
*camping*
Denzel: Goodnight Marlene.
Marlene: Goodnight Denzel.
Denzel: Do you believe in ghosts?
*they both stay up all night in terror*
Denzel: Dad? How do I be like you?
Cloud: I want you to be better than me. I want you to learn from my mistakes. Don’t watch my sword. If you want to know how my boots will touch the earth, watch my breathing at my navel.
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Denzel: *being dramatic* You don’t even love me!
Cloud: Because I won’t let you eat chickpeas? That’s why I don’t love you?
Denzel: Yes!
Cloud: You’re allergic to chickpeas.
Denzel: *even more dramatic* It’s only a mild allergy! Let me live!
Cloud: *exasperated* Believe me, I’m trying.
Cloud: You can be whatever you want.
Denzel: I want to be just like you.
Cloud: *has a panic attack* C-chose something else.
Denzel: Dad what’s the most adult thing you’ve ever done?
Tifa: Oh this will be good.
Cloud: I got my tires changed and bought insurance on all of them once.
Denzel: That’s it?
Tifa: Marrying me? Raising a son?
Cloud: I need you both to understand that the old tires weren’t even completely bald yet.
