I know people say us northern countries don't use spices. But. Like. You guys need to know about Denmark and cinnamon. Because I checked on AO3, and Denmark has no fanfics about any of the following.

Denmark should be obsessed and a little addicted to cinnamon. For like. Reasons.

You all know cinnamon rolls, right? Not the character type, the actual pastry. Well, there's a Danish version of it.

Back in 2013, Danish bakeries were in some real danger, because the EU were starting to regulate coumarin, which in large doses (like really big) causes liver damage, and is found in cinnamon – especially the Chinese cinnamon type, which is the one found everywhere in Denmark. Including in our cinnamon rolls. In fact, the amounts in bakerybought cinnamon rolls exceeded the amount allowed by EU regulations – do note that regulations are different for seasonal food (classified as traditional), which is probably the only reason most of Danish Christmas cookies and risengrød stayed safe. Swedish cinnamon rolls were safe because they were classified as traditional in the beginning, because damn those Swedes. But. Instead of reducing the amount of cinnamon in the cinnamon rolls, the relevant organisations in Denmark went together to find a way to keep the cinnamon rolls full of cinnamon the way we like it. And in 2014, they managed to get the traditional classification, and our cinnamon rolls were safe to poison us! :D (honestly, don't worry, just like, don't eat 5 Danish cinnamon rolls every day and don't give kids a bunch of cinnamon to eat.)

But if you thought that's the only weird thing Denmark has with cinnamon, think again! We are VERY weird about cinnamon in DK!

So, in English, we refer to unmarried women (typically older) as spinsters if we're rude, and the male equivalent is bachelor, but that doesn't have the same negative implication. In Danish, we can be rude to men and women for being older and unmarried, we call them "pebermø" (pepper maiden) and "pebersvend" (pepper guy). The latter was actually used in regards to German spice traders in the 1500s who were not allowed to marry while travelling. But here comes the fun part. If you're not married when you turn 30, then you are officially a pepper maiden/pepper guy (clearly we need a nonbinary option). And that should be celebrated! How, you ask?

Well, there's a few different ways. The classic one is recieve a pepper grinder or food items containing pepper. That's if your friends are nice. 😈 If they're not nice, they might just pour a few kilograms of pepper on you. Hope you didn't put on any nice, white clothes, they're ruined now.

Now, in Jutland, some people thought waiting until your friends turned thirty was too long. What if they'd never get to give their friends any pepper? D: This had to be solved, so everyone could get spices thrown at them in wasteful amounts that would disgust even medieval royalty.

The solution? Cinnamon.

For your 25th birthday, if your friends love you, they give you a nice little cinnamon roll (I got that for mine). If they don't...........?

Remember the cinnamon challenge? It's a bit like that, except you don't have to eat it. Here's a picture from a webstore specialising in "gifts" for the unmarried 25 or 30 year old:

Thank you, Stars. You understand my need to be insane about things.

This is the strange story of the worst Christmas calendar ever aired on Danish TV – maybe on any TV ever. And everything around it. Gonna put it under a read more, because uh. The lore is extensive.

Jul og grønne skove or Jul i hullet (Christmas and green forests, nickname: Christmas in the hole) – a ramble:

🔥 A Hetalia hot take – ok, so first I had a mental debate with myself on the difference between a hot take and a headcanon, and I'm still not sure what the difference is. I'll go with a headcanon where I'm pretty sure I'm against the entire fandom:

I don't think Denmark likes Prussia. At all. I think he's quite afraid of him actually – the reason is due to the 2. Schleswig War, which was Denmark vs. Prussia and Austria.

Historical context: The outcome of the first Schleswig War was a meager victory to Denmark, but in the Second Schleswig War (1864), Prussia basically gave Denmark a national trauma so big that Danes are still affected by it today in our mentality. It's immediate aftereffects was a withdrawal from the international scene, and it marked the shift for Denmark from a big, important warmongering nation to a small country that had no influence. There's even a saying from this time: "What is outwards lost, must be gained inwardly" (Hvad udad tabes skal indad vindes), which means that the loss of land should spur on the arts, because that's all we had left. It was a really good flourishing of the arts though, since it brought the world H. C. Andersen (and several others who are more famous in Denmark than the rest of the world). During WW2, this loss can be directly ascribed to Denmark's capitulation to German forces after just six hours.

For these reasons, I think Denmark would actually be quite fearful of Prussia, but not really ascribe that same fear to Germany in present day. It goes against The Awesome Trio, which I'm not sure is canon or fanon. 🤔

So yeah. That's a hot take, I think.

🪞Physical appearance headcanon for my favourite character (Romano, it's Romano).

I love when Romano's kind of muscular and chubby – the last part is canon, but I don't think the first one is. Like the body of someone who works a physical job and doesn't have the time nor cares to get bodybuilder fit. Just think of him standing next to his twink of a younger brother while looking like a real working class guy–

💛 A friendship that doesn't exist in canon, but I'd like to see:

I realise I've been so entrenched with fanon and headcanons over the years that I'm not sure which friendships are in canon and which aren't...

Danish people to each other are very, very proud of our country, but bringing up Denmark for no reason, randomly, feels like we're doing something wrong, because Denmark doesn't matter on the big scene. Not in our eyes, at least. A lot of Danes don't even think about it actively or consciously. It's also connected to a part of Danish mentality stemming from the 1930's called The Law of Jante (Janteloven). This is a code of conduct described in a novel from that period, and it basically boils down to: "don't think you're better than anyone else, you're nothing special."