Hello Women's History Month.

hey sweetie i know it's been a while but i am going to make this quick.

Can you just... rewind time to when we were together... even if only for an hour.. or two? I really need to talk to you cause I have no one to talk to right now and I just need you.  Every stress possible has popped up again..and again.. and again. I am questioning my standings with everyone and everything and i dont know. 

Just a little update i guess

Lucy! I am graduating this year! HIGH SCHOOL! the thing we wanted to face together? yeh it's almost over for me and it's everything i wished it wouldn't be. Without you and scary. and HEY GUESS WHAT! i DIDNT quit RAP. I followed high school according to our plan. Met a nice guy in grade 9 and fell in love then out of love then in love again and back out. I have passed every course I took. I KEPT TO RAP! I chose an instrument i thought was completely ridiculous then fell inlove with it. I danced again. I started writing again. I am still adding to my library. I met AMAZING people and some not so amazing. Yes, i did end up with Marc at one point like you said.. and yes i did stay friends with Paul. No, the whole Allysa, Kass, Carmine and I friendship fell apart. I no longer talk to any of them. My friendship with Jon, Julia, Justin and Brock would die off every once in a while but I still stayed friends with them too. I met an old friend of yours, Jane, shes really nice and i'm glad you both had a chance to know each other. (please visit her too for me please just to make sure she's okay) Lucy, i do have to admit I did lose my love for music and singing. I'm sorry. Also the relationship between me and parents haven't improved either... i know, i said i'd work on it. And I did give up on piano in grade 9 (in my defense it was because Anna was no longer my teacher anymore)  Also i'm turning 18 in a month! The age we said we'd move to California, become music producers and get famous so we can be on dancing with the stars so you'd be able to meet Derek Hough. LOL sorry to say but that's another thing I have given up on. I just wanna lead a simple life after I graduate.  To be honest Lucy, a lot has changed and so have I. I am not as happy as before and kinda just give up on this whole concept of life and kinda just wanna join you ASAP but I know it's not my time so i'm just gonna have to keep waiting. 

Sorry hun i just have no idea what to say anymore and i think this is scaring me because i always just stop and talk to you but i can never write it out :/