I don’t know why but I’ve been thinking about you a lot more lately. And even though it’s been four months since the breakup, I still feel so overwhelmed.
All I know is that I still miss you, a lot. And it hurts that we can’t talk anymore or see each other. And it hurts that you don’t love me anymore. And that you’re having so much more fun doing whatever you’re doing and I’m stuck here thinking about you. Honestly, I miss everything we had. I miss being with you, spending time together. I miss you loving me. And I miss meaning something to you.
Perhaps the reason why it still hurts so much is because I still have a hard time letting go of what it once was. When we were two years into our relationship, I felt important to you. I felt like I meant something to you. And I can’t deny that I loved that feeling. But after you came back from Europe, after you graduated, everything changed so fast. You became someone else, someone I couldn’t recognize. And afterwards, I didn’t feel important to you anymore. I started to doubt that you cared. And maybe I was right in the end, maybe you stopped caring. And it hurts to have to experience that.
It’s only been a few months and I’m still here trying to overcome this breakup. While you’re going about it your own way, I’m still trying to survive this. I won’t deny that I missed everything: you and me, us, together. But tough situations make room for the better things in life. So even though I’m still hurting, I’m going to continue to hold onto whatever is in store for me.
I still miss you, and honestly, a part of me still loves you. And I guess that’s something I’ll have to accept. Maybe some time down the road, these feelings won’t sting or hurt as much as they do now.
But right now, I miss you and I miss us. And I miss all of the things we could have had together.