#de bathsheba

Johnny Splash and Bathsheba wouldn't work not because the bathtub and shower dating is too on-the-nose. Not because Bathsheba is mean to everyone. But because Johnny Splash would entirely lose himself to being Bathsheba's little 1950s himbo golden retriever boyfriend who looks at her with the biggest heart eyes ever and completely forget that she's kind of the worst. He would write and perform his silly little songs for her he'd go on that damn talent show and announce "this one's for you, my Bath-shee-bah" with a little wink. He'd be calling her corny nicknames. My sugar bear my apple blossom babe type shit. And Bathsheba's standards would skyrocket until even Rebel and Amir aren't good enough to hang around.