#dc shitpost

Clark, in Bruce's body, wiping some blood off his mouth and wincing at the 15 cracked ribs he now has: Guess I can bleed, huh

Dick, staring in disbelief after the patrol: YES OFCOURSE YOU CAN!? WHY THE HELL DID YOU THROW YOURSELF DIRECTLY ON TOP OF A GRENADE-

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Bruce, in Clark's body, squinting at the bright smallville sun at the Kent farm: This is way too much for 11 am

Jon, staring at his newly grumpy dad: I think batman is a bad influence on you, dad

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Clark in Bruce's body, staring at his reflection in the mirror: The shoulder to waist ratio is insane, such a grabbable waist

Poor Tim, who accidentally overheard this, getting ready to call Arkham: Uhuh it's definitely, insane

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Kon: And so I said, ofcourse, i would love the soup-er salad!

Bruce in Clark's body, deadpan expression on his face:

Kon: Get it? Soup-er salad?

Bruce: Yes

Kon, sad puppy expression: You always laugh at soup puns :(

Bruce, now with an Extremely Forced little smile: Yes it was very....funny

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Clark, in Bruce's body, rushing to hug a visibly bleeding Jason who walked into the cave after patrol: What happened?! Are you okay?

Jason, freezing up because the last time Bruce ran to hug him was, never:

Clark, immediately backing up, and speaking with a deliberately gruff voice: I mean. Is the blood yours? Son.

Jason:...no

Tim: huh??

Jason: you know, like before it happens you just know you're going to be pissed no matter what?

Tim: uhm... no--

Dick: *walks into the room* hey guys!

batman: stuck in gotham 🌪️🌩️🏚️

batman: dark, doomed, and dangerous 🕯️🃏🎩

batman: window washer wayne 🫧🪣🪟

batman: aquaman special 🌊🐡🔱

batman: the darkest of the knights 🗡️🦇🪦

batman: he adopts another kid 🧑🧃🥊

batman: alfred pennyworth, year 2 🤵‍♂️💼🔎

superman family fun bonanza extravaganza 🤾‍♂️🛝🎳

wonder woman: amazons of the artic (written by tom king) ❄️🔭🌌