#datingat50

10/28/2019 Do you remember where we met? I do. We connected on Tinder. I was recently divorced and completely unsure how to go about dating. So Tinder seemed like the logical choice haha! After a series of not-so-stellar first dates I “matched” with you. I still remember those first texts like they were yesterday. You were charming (I know you hate that word!) and easy to text with. Flirty texts turned into an invitation to meet pretty quickly. Which I both loved and was nervous about, all at the same time. Then the next dilemma, where to meet. You asked me first, which was nice. And I think you were impressed when I rattled off a few local places around downtown. I remember you even commenting that you hadn’t visited a few of them, but you seemed totally up for it. We landed on the place across the street from your apartment. I of course didn’t know that at the time, but how convenient for you. If things didn’t work out you could have one drink and be out. I, on the other hand, had to make the drive from the ‘burbs, which wasn’t a big deal, but it gave me some time to get nervous on my way. I arrived a few minutes early and of course the place was packed. It was Saturday night and we didn’t have a reservation. I went in and couldn’t even find two seats at the bar. I texted, told you I was there, and you said you were “across the street and on your way.” Not 2 seconds later I saw you across the street, waiting to cross at the light. Wearing one of your favorite vests (I later learned you rarely went anywhere without wearing a vest with a pocket for your reading glasses!) You ambled across the street so confidently, arriving at the restaurant where I was waiting out front and you gave me a quick peck on the cheek to say hello. Presumptuous given that we were meeting for the first time, but I found it absolutely charming. I explained that it was packed and we may want to find somewhere else to go in the neighborhood, but instead you said “I got this” and we went inside. After talking to the bartender for a minute you gave me a quick head nod to join you. Two people in front of us were getting ready to go and we would snag their seats. This is how it always went with us. No matter where we went you’d grab two seats at the bar and strike up a conversation with the bartender. Hell, you knew most of them. Especially when we went places in your neighborhood. It was cold outside and the bar was so warm and inviting. We both ordered a drink and, since I was still so nervous I drank my glass of wine way too quickly. And got tipsy way too quickly, which I know you enjoyed. Because then I started to open up and talk more freely. Before long, instead of sitting beside each other facing the bar we were sitting facing each other, legs pretty much intertwined. As we talked and laughed and drank we got closer and closer. Eventually you had your hands on my knees and were leaning in for a kiss., which I gave up immediately. This was a first for me. Dating was a novelty at that point. But you had this way about you that just made me comfortable. I knew from the first time I met you that I didn’t have anything to be afraid of. We just had that connection. After a couple of hours, that seemed like 30 minutes, we decided it was time to go. The way you were looking at me I know you wanted me to go home with you. But I still had some of my wits about me, and hadn’t slept with anyone since my divorce. That night was not going to be THE night that I broke that particular streak. I know you were disappointed, and you kept asking if I was “sure.” Yes, I was sure. So we stood on the busy street corner and made out like teenagers, not caring who was walking past us. You walked me to my car, we kissed some more (man, you were a good kisser!), and then it was time for me to head home. Before I left you leaned down, I rolled my window down, and you asked me to text when I got home so that you knew I got there safely. Nice…really nice. Could not have been a better first date! RIP Andy…I’m so sorry I didn’t have the opportunity to say goodbye…

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