#date everything tyrell

Tyrell- Now, he's one of the household objects that has had experience with kids. And, it was not fun. You have to promise him that you're going to respect his boundaries. He's not going to get cut up into work rags on your watch.

The one that actually bridges the gap is his little buddy. The kids love the fun animal shapes! At first Tyrell looks like he's going to pass out. But, when nothing happens, he's a little less apprehensive.

It will take him a bit to actually be comfortable interacting (as his towel self, they can see his personality version), so swimming or anything else that needs to dry off will have to wait a few times if them being over.

Curt and Rod- the other ones that have been in a house that has had kids in it. They actually like having kids over. Maybe not for having kids live in the house, but a visit or two is nice. They're like the cool uncles. Though, Curt does like kids a bit more than Rod though.

Hide-and-seek? You bet! There would be a set of little feet hiding behind the curtains, giggles going crazy. "Keep it quiet, little dude! You're gonna get caught!" Curt would hush them!

"Nah! There's no way! We got you, kid!" Rod would laugh, neither of them think about the fact the kids can't even hear them.

Washford and Drysdale- One of them is actually alright with having kids over and the other loathes it.

Washford, who has to do the heavy work of getting everything out of the clothes from dirt to apple juice to paint is fine, almost happy with the extra work. Children getting dirty means children learning! And, if cleaning a bit more than usual is what it takes for them to be curious about the world around them, then he's more than willing to do that.

Drysdale, who literally just has to dry the clothes when they're ready is practically dying. He's all for physical fitness, but he feels like he's been going in circles the whole damn day! Don't those things ever stop making messes?!

Kopi- Oh, she doesn't know if she would get along with kids. They aren't supposed to have coffee, and that's like her thing. Oh, she can make water for premade hot cocoa though! Or, maybe tea?

She ends up being a big hit if the kid visits during a cold month. Sometimes she'll team up with Hector to crank up the air so even if it's not too cold outside you all can still enjoy making a hot drink with each other.

Beverly- Is a sweet person, and would like to see the kids... but, you know. Can't have alcohol around where littles could get into it.

At first, she was going to get completely banned to the laundry room, but then she and you got an idea. Moving things over in the cupboard (and telling Mitchell to get over it), you put all the kid-unfriendly drinks out of reach, and left out the bar, some plastic cups, and a shaker.

She couldn't remember the last time, if ever, she ran a lemonade stand! And, lemonade does taste better when you make it one cup at a time and shake it to mix everything. All in all, it's a very sticky, but very fun time.

Rebel- They thought they would hate kids.

They have never felt more fulfilled in their entire life.

They're not just a Rebel during water playtime. Duck no! They're a submarine! Now, they're a shark! Now, they're an airplane! Now, they're a shark airplane! Now, they're a grandma in the mountains selling bubbles and cats!!

Will never admit that they enjoy playing though. Makes their tough image hard to keep up. Says they're just doing it to not be a jerk to the kid playing with them.

Eddie and Volt- No. Absolutely not. Electricity and children do not mix; for safety and socially. Those little caps you put into the wall outlets that keep kids from hurting themselves? How that translates to whatever they place the furniture people all live, and like jump in and out of like a Mario 64 painting, is the BreakerBox being boarded up like a natural disaster is going to happen.

They're actually just huddled in their room like a zombie apocalypse movie. When something gets uncovered, they tense up like something is going to eat them.

"I can't keep doing this, Eddie," Volt sobs, "Why does that little human keep trying to stab us with pencils!?”

"Just stay strong, Volt," Eddie tries to soothe his partner as well as himself, "Livewire would never let anyone get hurt. Us or the kids."

Dorian- He doesn't like kids. They're loud, they leave doors open or slam them closed, and just aren't something he's up for dealing with.

When the kid gets there though, a dad mode he didn't even know existed clicks on.

It is his sworn duty to keep doors closed, especially to places like the bathrooms and laundry room to keep this tiny thing safe.

If the kid manages to pinch their fingers when closing a door, this man is almost inconsolable. He didn't mean to close that fast, and now this kid he wanted to keep safe is crying. Even when you tell him the kid was startled more than hurt, he would still take it hard.

☆ﾟ°˖*Amir

Amir does his job best, to reflect back your gorgeous visage with gusto and an ongoing stream of praise even though you won’t be able to hear any of it in this lifetime, but that hardly stops him as he always finds himself cooing and muttering how beautiful you are when you grace him with your presence in his many reflections.

So really, it’s both a blessing and a curse for him to be placed by your dresser where he can reflect back the whole view of your bed and your shivering form.

How he aches to have you turn yourself towards him, to let him see and watch how you work your fingers on you. It’s torturous, only being able to hear your quiet gasps, the muffled whining from your pillow or the desperate moaning as you reach your peak.

Oh, how you torture this poor mirror azizam.

Don’t blame him when he starts thinking of various positions you can do to properly show your beauty in all angles.

But what he truly longs for is to be able to see your face clearly, without anything obscuring your beauty so he can see how you would close your eyes tightly and grit your teeth to keep your sounds from spilling out once you climaxed.

Oh how he longs to see it, and hopes that he would be able to be the one to bring out all kinds of faces you can make for your pleasure.

☆ﾟ°˖*Betty

Your bed is the last thing you see and feel, and the first thing you wake up to when your alarm rings or when some stream of sunshine manages to slip past your curtains to rudely wake you up.

Betty always tries to savor that feeling of your body sinking down the mattress or you using and clutching your pillows in your sleep. With your job, you’re always so quick to leave her in the morning and only have so little time to sleep in her after having another overtime.

And imagine her happiness when you have a day off today! Despite the sun already up and Timothy already done with his job of waking you up, you just quietly slip back under the covers and not a minute later until your breathing slows that you’re back in dreamland.

She’s glad you decided to sleep in, you definitely needed it after many sleepless nights in that dreadful job of yours. And she won’t deny that she missed you.

You weren’t exactly immune to wet dreams, a fact that Betty knows with her whole being. So when she feels you grinding yourself on her sheets, well, she missed this too.

It’s really hard for her, being this close to you yet never being able to touch or hold you in the way she wants. She watches you with lidded eyes, wondering just what kind of dream has you this hot and bothered.

Oh she fantasizes so many things, maybe it was a hot coworker of yours, or ohh maybe it's a gorgeous stranger that asked you for directions, hell maybe it's that favorite barista of yours.

“Please…” You mumbled in your sleep. How she wants to help you, to embrace you and whisper sweet nothings in your ear as she works you off.

“Go ahead honey, grind on me.” She whispers to you, watching as your hips go frantic before stilling and a quiet moan following. Then you’re fluttering your eyes and she imagines that you’re actually seeing her, that your silly smile was for her.

But it’s not, she watches you rise and a curse falls from your lips seeing the mess on your pajama pants, then you’re already leaving her to start your day.

☆ﾟ°˖*Celia

The first time it happened was an accident really, the other times though, we’re not.

Really it’s hard to not watch you when she's literally the ceiling for crying out loud. There’s only so much she can do in this state.

With how chaotic the house can get and the growing piles of complaints (most of them being Beverly and her bar or Lux) Celia needed a way to wind down from her duties.

Chairemi’s plays and her dearest Florence is a big help until Chairemi is on her day off and she doesn't want Florence to worry for her.

Watching you hump on your pillow was… quite entertaining. The way your hair clings to your sweaty face or that tantalizing arch of your back when you speed up.

Well, don’t tell Chairemi but she much prefers watching you get yourself off than her plays.

You were a delight. Even when she tries to look away or busy herself with reading another one of Tony’s projects, just a little sound from you has her turning her head to your form.

Enthralled on the way you chase your pleasure and those shivers of yours– there’s no object in this house who wouldn’t watch you.

She may not show or say it but she’s always waiting to watch the next time you’re feeling particularly horny.

☆ﾟ°˖*Curt and Rod

Oh lord…

“Did you see that?”

“Shut your mouth, I’m trying to watch–”

“So am I but you got to admit that was really cute when they–”

“Shhh!”

Not even when they’re watching you fuck yourself, they still wouldn’t shut up.

This is one of their favorite things to watch, more than throwing shades to poor innocent strangers just walking by outside. It’s almost at a tie with throwing shade at each other. And you should be honored (even though you wouldn’t know that until a certain sunglasses arrives).

One of their favorite positions of yours is when you’re on your back and just when you’re about to get your release, the way you throw your head back jussst right has them seeing your blissed out face as you ride out your high.

Damn you really do look cute like this.

And that’s the ONLY time they’re both quiet, greedily watching your chest rise and fall as you bask in pure endorphins.

But there are those moments where they’re both spewing absolute filth while watching you, and if you could only hear the kinds of things they say…

“Look at that.”

“I’m looking.”

“Don’t they look cute riding that pillow?”

“Yeah but I think they look better bent over.”

But most of the time it’s just them arguing.

“Wow they’re close already?”

“Oh so you can talk but I can’t?”

“Yeah cuz I can’t listen to them with your grating voice.”

“Grating?! Now I know that’s a lie–”

“SHHHH!”

☆ﾟ°˖*Dirk

He’s your clothes.

There’s literally nothing else I can say.

He’s the first to know your arousal, the one who can feel your growing wetness in your underwear when you’re busy writing away your very erotic smutty fanfics on Mac. The one who can feel your desperation as you squirm in your seat when the heat is getting too much.

Dirk absolutely revels during your writing session.

The way you cross your thighs together has him reeling, and if he closes his eyes then he can imagine he’s in between it, the feeling as you wrap your thighs around his head, and he can almost practically taste you.

But it never last long when you start stripping him off of you. Depraving him from the main course.

He almost cried when you had to throw him back to Harper.

If there was a ranking on which object has touched you the most: Dirk is winning that one (sorry Stepford).

☆ﾟ°˖*Hector

He didn’t mean to watch you, honest!

But he is a weak HVAC and he cannot stop himself when he’s being lured in by your breathing and groans that are akin to a siren's call.

He already sees you so highly and perfect but watching you has whet an appetite he didn’t knew he had.

Some part of him is aching to help and be of use for you, watching you pleasure yourself is a blessing but oh how he wishes to help you. You don’t even have to say a word, you just need to lay down and beckon him– ever the servant he is for your needs and pleasure, he will do everything he can to make you happy.

But alas, he is not the object that is deserving to be near you let alone touch you. His looks will surely disgust you. :(

After seeing you so exposed and in your most vulnerable has plagued him with such haunting images and thoughts.

And maybeeee he wrote those things into a story, a very detailed story of things he’s only finding out about himself. :3

Oh darling not only are you so perfect and lovely, you even inspired him!

☆ﾟ°˖*Mateo

Another he-didn’t-meant-to-watch! Pt.2

Unlike Hector who can only watch through the vents, Mateo has himself tangled in between your thighs.

Is this heaven? Yes, but he’s so embarrassed and flustered and it only got worse as you started grinding against your blanket (him).

Oh god, it feels good and you feel good so this is alright, right?

He doesn’t know if he can survive this honestly… And he actually doesn't want to survive it.

Because with how soft and warm your thighs are, he doesn’t want to leave or for this moment to end quickly.

He watches, he hears and he can feel you all at the same time. This is too much for him! It's both overstimulating but yet still not enough - and he feels horrible for thinking about how your skin and touch would actually feel on him.

The way you clutch onto him as you’re nearing your peak is almost like you’re pulling on his hair - which he didn’t know he was into.

You pulled your blanket closer to you, exhaustion already pulling you to sleep, aftercare thrown out the window as sleep takes you over.

With your slow breathing and your calming heartbeat is starting to lull Mateo to sleep as well, and his day was exhausting helping and caring for the inanimals, so maybe it’s fine for him to take a rest.

That was the best sleep he had in a while.

☆ﾟ°˖*River

There’s hardly a moment where you aren’t using water in your day-to-day life. Cooking, washing, cleaning and bathing as well. Your literal body is just water. Through it River has gotten to know you so well and quite intimately.

You were off to relax in your bathtub as a reward for surviving another horrible week at work and god you deserved this. The water, warm and filled with scents of lavender and roses from a bathbomb you used, is just the remedy for your aching muscles.

River is more than familiar with your body. She has each slope, curve, and beauty mark of yours memorized, and once you step inside your bathtub she was more than happy to embrace you once more.

Everything was the perfect definition of relaxation, your stress and frustration melting away and instead leaving a heady feeling as you slowly caressed your thighs, inch by inch your hand nearing closer to your nether region.

It’s the first time you’re doing this in your bath but unfortunately your horniness prevails as you slowly work yourself up with each touch.

It’s also the first time for River and a few denizens inside the bathroom to see and hear you pleasure yourself outside the bedroom, they can sometimes hear you but really they only get scraps of information from the others who gotten front row seats, but even then they only had to use their imaginations to paint the picture of you.

And how truly lovely you look as you work up a sweat on your forehead, glistening all the while under the light. Those descriptions the others gave did not do you any justice at all - or maybe it was just the lack of imagination for them, who knows.

Waves of water splashed and spilled but River couldn’t care, too focused on watching you and all the little twitches and shivers you made. Right now it feels like it’s just you and her in your own little bubble. (If you only noticed how the water started to get a little warmer but your head is long gone into that familiar space.)

There’s something so intimate to all of this, her embracing your body and being able to touch and feel you in her liquid state. The way the water surrounds and drips from your body is quite alluring.

When you finally come, River watches the way your release mixes and fades in the water, leaving no traces of your debauchery. Maybe later after seeing Winnifred she’ll have to paint lavenders and roses as a souvenir.

(Bonus, because I love the second bathroom objects)

As you go and start cleaning yourself off with Tyrell, unbeknownst to you there’s a lively chattering in your bathroom happening right now.

“Ohh, didn’t they look so cute!” Bathsheba was only the one so excited and gushing over your little show, the others lost into their own worlds all except for a certain rubber duck.

“That was really pathetic, I mean- coming already when it hasn't even been 10 minutes? Really ducking embarrassing.” Rebel said with a sneer as they floated around inside the bathtub.

“But they were cute, weren’t they Rebbie?” There was silence until a groan and Rebel swishing across the water.

“Ducking… I guess…” That reply seemed to be enough for Bathsheba as she glanced around the room to see the other’s reaction.

“Oh I know I have the exact same blush color to match around here… hmm, did I place it in the plants collection or the food collection…” Barry was off looking all over for that blush, Tyrell and Amir are busy doing their jobs while Jean Loo… Is busy staring into space, red faced and all that.

☆ﾟ°˖*Tyrell

It’s his job to clean and soak up all kinds of liquids you encounter or spilled (except mud), he takes pride and does his job dutifully.

Doesn’t mean he isn’t embarrassed when you go and start rubbing him over your chest, to your stomach and down, down to your sweet thighs.

Look, he is a professional. He has dried you up multiple times, he’s made for thi– OOOKAY NOW YOU’RE DIRECTLY WIPING HIM TO YOUR STAINS, OKAY.

This part of his job is a privilege only he has– unless you decide to use your clothes to wipe down your mess (damn you Dirk, that’s his job).

Even through his embarrassment, he prioritizes you and your comfort, so he has to be extra fluffy and warm when you’re doing your aftercare.

Too bad towel buddy isn’t here - they’re a kitchen towel - if he could, he would shape towel buddy into your favorite animal.

Something for you to smile at after you're done with your ‘activity’.

☆ﾟ°˖*Skips

He’s there, he always is. Just creeping at the crevices between furniture and even under your bed, once the sun’s down he’s free to move room by room, watching and listening to the happenings between objects but that’s not what he wants to see.

Slipping past Dorian’s shadow it seems he’s just right on time, your clothes thrown in a corner and you, the most gorgeous human he has laid his eyes on, just started with your little ‘show’.

He wonders how you’ll react, that your once empty and lonely house is actually filled with so many people, and all of them who are so curious about you.

How would you react after finding out that almost a dozen pairs of eyes are hungrily watching and taking in your naked body, your wanton moans that reverberate in your bedroom or how you leak and stain the covers and blankets of your cum.

It’s unlikely it’ll happen, but that hardly stops anyone from fantasizing about you and what they could do to you, their dear human.

So he watches just like the others, taking it all in as you sped your hand to chase that high, your other hand settling on teasing and pulling your nipples, cheeks red and a bead of sweat trickling down your neck.

He watches and waits with bated breath, you’re getting closer to cumming, just a bit more and– there you go.

Those sharp inhales and gasps you take is music in his ears. The tension in your shoulder drops and you sink back into your mattress, you’re probably feeling quite content now he’s sure.

He stays to watch you after you’re done cleaning up and once you're settled under the cover he’s quietly slipping past back to the shadows of a globe.

Your nightly activities became his respite. And it’s embarrassing but you somehow bring such comfort from your presence alone.

He wonders what you would be like if you met him, would you play along with Shadowlord and his ritual of collecting his armaments back? Would you like his true form – Skips Shadley even when he looks completely different as Shadowlord? He wonders if there’s a possibility for something to bloom between the two of you.

But then he thinks about Benji, and his hurt and loneliness is back crashing in waves.

Besides, it’s silly and stupid about thinking of being able to talk with the human, it’s just wistful fantasy and daydreaming on his and the other object’s part.