Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
I had a feeling this episode was just going to be a one-time deal. Because of that, I didn't get TOO hyped, but this was still a pretty good episode overall. LOVED watching Leo and Raph fighting side-by-side and against each other. Those moments were the highlight of this episode and had me squealing and rooting for my brotp. x3 Now time to read (and possibly write?) all the extended fan fiction for this episode, because you KNOW the fans are going to want more Dark!Raph. ;)
Iâm just going to predict right now that dark!Raph isnât going to last longer than one episode. I just feel like there wasnât much build up for this, and if it was going to be some kind of arch, there wouldâve been more build up. Spirit Quest got hella built up and even that only lasted one episode. And for that reason, Iâm not as emotionally compromised as I could be about dark!Raph.
Also, imagine: Dr. Rockwell as Aprilâs psychic mentor. Dr. Rockwell being the one to train April to reach her full psychic potential. Just imagine.Â
Seriously the mind controlled Raph episode hasn't even aired yet and the place is flooded with Dark!Raph fan art and they speak of it to ask blogs like the characters know it's gonna happen like wth
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
â Live Streamingâ Interactive Chatâ Private Showsâ HD Quality
Anya is LIVE right now
FREE
Free to watch âą No registration required âą HD streaming
Summary: Raph only remembers bits and pieces of being under Shredderâs control. Considering that everything he does remember so far is attacking his brothers and beating Mikey within an inch of his life, Raph isnât sure he wants to remember.
A/N: Speculation for the aftermath of the upcoming Dark!Raph stuff. Most likely wonât happen this way, but this is where my angst-loving muse goes. Fills one of the prompts, âSunset,â in my writing challenge. Not mine. Title comes from âAfter the Bombsâ by The Decemberists, though this was largely written while listening to Mumford & Sonsâ âBelieveâ on repeat, so there you go.
-o-
New York City is ablaze with color tonight, thanks to a vibrant sunset. The air is pleasant, with only wisps of clouds in sight. In all, a quiet and peaceful evening â well, as quiet and peaceful as it ever is in a city of more than eight million people and a handful of mutants.
Raphael sits on the edge of the building, feet dangling over the lip of the edge, with his elbows on his knees and his shoulders curled in. The evening breeze feels strange on the bare skin of his face, and he feels oddly unbalanced without the familiar weight of his twin sai at his back.
Theyâre feelings heâs going to have to get used to. Despite the serenity of his surroundings, there will be no peace for him this night â nor, he muses darkly, will there be any in the foreseeable future. Not after what he did.Â
His head is spinning, and his stomach is flipping from some of the worst nausea heâs ever experienced in his life, and above him are Leo and Donnieâs faces, each with varying degrees of hope, anxiety, concern, and fear, which is the most confusing. Thereâs also the thin cut on Donnieâs cheek, the gigantic empty syringe in Donnieâs hand, and the bandages covering most of Leoâs left bicep and right thigh to wonder about â not to mention the fact that Raph feels like he came out the loser in a faceoff with a bulldozer.
And the worst part is Raph canât remember a thing.
âWhat happened?â he groans, bringing a hand up to over his eyes as he tries to block out the bright light overhead.
Donnieâs hand intercepts his, holding tightly as he leans in closer, peering intently into Raphâs eyes. âRaph? Are you back with us?â
âOf course I am, where else would I be?â Raph replies, and Donnie practically melts as the tension floods out of him, slumping over and resting his forehead on Raphâs plastron with a sigh; behind him, Leoâs shoulders relax and he closes his eyes as he, too, sighs with relief.
Nonplussed, Raph rubs Donnieâs head soothingly (is Donnie crying? he wonders when he feels drops falling on his chest, Donnie never cries) and looks to the left automatically to check in on his remaining brother â and blinks in surprise when he sees no one standing there. âWait, what happened, whereâs Miââ
Images suddenly rush through his brain, jumbled and half hazy, but no less horrifying: wide blue eyes, flashes of metal, trails of blood, the edge of a buildingâ
Raph pushes Don aside and barely rolls over in time, just managing to hang his head over the edge of the exam table before he loses the battle with nausea and vomits.
âWow, this is amazing! I shouldâve brought a camera â look at all the colors!â
Raph is so shocked at the unexpected voice he nearly pitches forward off the roof; he manages to stabilize himself before twisting around to look at the brother who caught him so off guard.
Mikey doesnât pay him any attention â heâs staring up at the color-streaked sky, drinking in the sight of the sunset turning the familiar New York skyline into a darkened silhouette, dotted with more and more lights as the sunlight fades away.
Raph feels his stomach churn again at the sight of his baby brother â more specifically, at the cast on his right leg going from ankle to mid-thigh; the splint on his right arm and the crutch propped under his left armpit; the multitude of bruises, nicks, and cuts all across his arms and legs; the ring of marks around his neck; the deep blue-black bruise that covers half his face and has swollen his left eye shut; the bandages wrapped tightly around the lower part of his torso.
Mikey grins widely â well, as widely as he can with a broken cheekbone â as he turns his gaze from the sunset to his brother. Heâs not wearing his mask, either; the evening light makes the bruising on his face contrast even further with his pale skin. âYouâve been holding out on me, Raph â this is like the coolest place to watch the sunset!â
âWhat are you doing here, shell-for-brains?â Raph demands, leaping to his feet as his temper â and his concern for his brother â flares.
âHello, Raph, nice to see you, too,â Mikey says, taking a few hobbling steps in Raphâs direction. He stops moving when he notices Raph tensing up and lightly adds, âThatâs what brothers should say when they havenât seen each other in a few days.â
Raph crosses his arms, hunching his shoulders defensively. Mikey kept any accusation out of his voice, but Raph can still hear the underlying hurt, anyway. Heâs always been able to read Mikey like a book â which is part of the problem. Even now, almost three weeks after waking up, Mikey is still moving stiffly, trying to hide his pain whenever his older brothers or Sensei are around keeping an eye on him (which is always). Heâs tried hard, but none of them have been fooled â they all know Mikey too well.
And it digs at Raph â not just because his vibrant brother is hobbling around like someone five times his age, but also because Raphâs the one that did that to him. And that knowledge hasnât made Leo or Don any easier to live with, either; Leoâs in the dojo mediating or training practically every chance he gets, and Donnieâs been either living in his lab or keeping a close eye on Mikey, and theyâve both been tiptoeing around Raph, hesitant to say anything for fear of breaking the awkward tension in the lair and making everything worse.
Not that Raph blames them in the slightest. They werenât the ones to go out and get captured by Shredder; they werenât the ones to get dosed with Shredderâs new mind control serum; they werenât the ones who had attacked their own family with every intention of wiping them out; they werenât the ones who attacked the youngest, beat and stabbed him, and nearly sent him plummeting to his death.
No, thatâs all on Raph. Which is why he left. Heâd screwed up before, but this. This goes against everything heâs grown up believing. Heâd believed that with enough strength and enough training, he could keep his family safe. Heâd believed that with enough determination, he would be able to keep any enemies away and keep his brothers â the most important people in his life, the ones he would die to protect â from ever getting hurt.
Instead, he had failed to the point of near disaster. Heâd attacked his family; heâd given Master Splinter a concussion; heâd forced Leo to face the reality of having to choose a brother to save; heâd nearly given Donnie a heart attack from all the stress in trying to develop a cure; heâd put Mikey in a freaking coma for two weeks.
Raph canât let them get hurt again â not when he can do something about it.
So heâd left early in the morning three days ago, before anyone else was awake, and heâd stayed away ever since. He thought heâd been doing a pretty good job of staying away, too, moving around from hideout to hideout. And yet, it obviously wasnât good enough, since his baby brother is now standing in front of him. âHowâd you even find me?â he demands.
âCasey,â Mikey replies simply, resting a little more of his weight on his crutch; his grin shifts into a crooked smirk. âAsked him about some of the places you guys like to hang out, and he sang like a canary â barely had to lay any hurt on him at all, bro, so I hope you havenât told him any secrets you donât want getting out.â
Raph scowls â not at the thought of Casey ratting him out, but at the knowledge that Casey only talked because Mikey is hurt. No one can resist Mikey for long when he wants to know something â especially if heâs hurt. âYou shouldnât be out of bed, Mikey, you should be resting, you nearly diedââ
Blue eyes stare at him; one is already swelling shut. He growls, tightening the grip he has around his enemyâs neck, causing the other to choke and splutter.
Cool, blood-slicked hands grip his forearm. But they donât claw at him or try to break his chokehold; they just rest there, firm and calm. Almost reassuring, even.
âItâs â itâs okay,â the other gasps, mouth curling in a weak attempt at a smile; the blue eyes are warm, despite the tell-tale lines of pain on his face. âThis isnât your â your fault. Iâm sorry, and I love you, bro.â
Behind him, a gasp and footsteps rushing toward him â breaking the moment. Firming his resolve. âOh shellâ Raphael, no, donât â put him down!â
He smirks; looks down at the edge of the building in front of him, the open air beneath the otherâs feet. âAs you wish.â
âNO!â
âRaph?â
Raph blinks, and the image shifts from the memory of Mikey dropping out of sight and Leo diving after him to the sight of Mikey standing right in front of him, confused, worried, and so horribly injured that Raph can hardly look at him. Raph takes a step back instinctively, then two â keeping his youngest brother as far from danger as possible, like he always does.
Only this time, itâs Raph thatâs the danger.
âStay away from me, Mikey,â he warns, working hard to keep all emotion out of his voice; he fails when it cracks a little on his brotherâs name. He turns away, preparing to leap to the next rooftop and disappear into the shadows. âYou need to stay away.â
âWhat? No, Raph, wait â oh, shell!â
Raph wheels back around at the shout in time to see Mikey stumble as the crutch, which had caught on something loose on the rooftop, skids out from under him. In a flash, Raphâs there, grabbing his brother around his shoulders and hauling him upright before he can fall to his knees and damage his broken leg further. Mikey hisses in pain, curling his splinted right arm around his stomach as all the sudden movement jostles the still-healing gashes in his plastron.
Raph feels bile and panic rising at the thought that heâs causing his brother pain again, and he starts to pull away. âIâm so sorry, Mikey, Iââ
A hand grips his forearm, and Raph freezes as he stares at it; itâs like his flashback, but it isnât â this time the hand isnât cool and slick from blood loss, but warm and clean and alive.
âIt wasnât your fault, Raph.â
Raph looks from the hand to his brotherâs face. Even with the bruise marring half his face and the pain that heâs undoubtedly feeling, judging by the tightness around his eyes, Mikey is still smiling, his unblackened eye shining with warmth and affection and hero-worship â the same look heâs always reserved for his older brothers.
Raphâs throat closes up and he closes his eyes; he doesnât deserve that look anymore, not after all thatâs happened. âOf course it is, Mikey,â he chokes out. âLook at what I did. You â you were in a coma for weeks!â
The hand on his arm tightens. âRaphael. It wasnât your fault,â Mikey stresses. Thereâs a brief pause; Mikey sighs, and his voice is notably rougher when he quietly adds, âIt was mine.â
Raphâs eyes fly open; heâs stunned to see the guilty slump to Mikeyâs shoulders, the regret on his face. âWhat are you talking about?â
Mikey swallows. âDo you remember why you left the lair in the first place? Before Shredder grabbed you?â
Raph shakes his head. Donnie had asked the same question not too long after he had administered the cure heâd developed for Shredderâs mind control serum, and a few more times throughout the second week of Mikeyâs coma. Raph only remembers bits and pieces of the month heâd been under Shredderâs control, and the entire week before that is completely gone â a side effect of Shredderâs serum, most likely, or maybe of Donnieâs cure.
Considering that everything Raph does remember so far is attacking his brothers, beating Mikey within an inch of his life, and nearly killing Leo in their final encounter, Raph isnât sure he wants to remember much more.
âWe had a fight,â Mikey says quietly, scuffing his unbroken leg in the gravel on the rooftop and keeping his gaze focused on the ground. âA real one. It was â well, it doesnât really matter what it was about. But you â it was my fault, and I made you so mad that you left, said you were going to hang out with Casey, only.â He pauses and swallows again. âOnly you never made it.â
Raphâs forehead furrows. âMikeyââ
Suddenly his arms are full of little brother as Mikey hugs him, arms wrapping tightly around Raphâs neck. Raph returns the hug instinctively, keeping his grip loose for fear of causing Mikey any more pain.
Mikey never stops talking, the words just coming out faster and faster as he says, âYou were gone for two days, and we were just so worried, and I thought maybe you thought I meant it, that I didnât want you around anymore. And then you were on that roof, and I was so relieved because you had come back â but it wasnât you, it was Shredder using you, and I was so scared that Donnie wouldnât be able to bring you back, that you were gone forever, and that the last thing you heard me say to you was that I hated you, that I was glad you were leaving, that I hoped you never came back, and itâs all my fault!â
âHey,â Raph says gruffly, pulling back just far enough to grab Mikey by the shoulders and give him a gentle shake. Mikey sniffs, his unbruised eye wide and watery with unshed tears. Raph ducks his head a little so that theyâre at the exact same eye level as he says, âI may not remember us arguing â though knowing us, Iâm sure it was something really stupid â but I sure as shell know youâd never say something like that and mean it. I know better than that.â
Mikey huffs a laugh, swiping at his face impatiently as the tears slip out, and says firmly, âAnd I know better than to ever think youâd want to hurt me â or Leo, or Donnie, or anybody that wasnât trying to hurt us first.â
Raph frowns at that, eyeing all the bandages Mikey is currently sporting. âBut, Iââ
âRaphael,â Mikey says, his voice stern and his face as serious as Raph has ever seen it, âif it had been Donnie who had gotten brainwashed and attacked you under Shred-headâs orders instead, would you blame him?â
âAbsolutely not,â Raph replies without a thought. Then he blinks in realization as Mikey grins at him, and he sighs, shaking his head ruefully. âAlright, fine. I see your point. Iâll deny this if you ever tell anyone, but you win this round, Mikey.â
Mikey chuckles, but his expression quickly grows serious again. âSo will you come back home? We â well, it wasnât pretty, waking up and finding out you were gone again, even with the note you left.â
Raph opens his mouth to reply when another voice suddenly calls out, âMikey, for the love of â Leo! I found them!â
They turn to see Don pulling himself up and over the edge of the building from his perch on the fire escape. âAre you guys okay?â he asks, sprinting over to them, glancing from Mikey to Raph and back, trying to see if they have any new injuries.
âIâm fine, heâs the one thatâs supposed to be camped out on the couch,â Raph says as he nudges Mikeyâs shoulder, smirking when Mikey sticks his tongue out at him, and claps a hand on Donnieâs shoulder when he joins them. âMikey tripped, though, think he might have tweaked something â probably better check him over.â
âRaph,â Mikey moans as Donnie immediately goes into doctor mode, checking to see if any of the bandages have started seeping blood again or have come loose, ignoring his brother when Mikey starts whining. Raph chuckles and takes a half-step back, giving his brainiac brother some room to work.
Then Leo appears next to them, and Raphâs shoulders tense at the inscrutable look on his brotherâs face. Leoâs eyes are narrowed slightly, and his mouth is turned down in a frown, and Raph braces himself for the punch he deserves when Leo spreads his arms â
And then suddenly heâs engulfed once again in a hug â which is weird in and of itself, Raph and Leo donât tend to hug much anymore â but then Leoâs grip tightens as Raph hugs him back, and Raph could swear Leo is shaking, like heâd been afraid or something.
Raph thinks about what Mikey was saying, and it clicks. Right â Raph disappearing last time hadnât ended so well, either. Leo had probably worried Raph would relapse or something â
âIâm sorry,â Leo says suddenly, âfor making you feel like you had to leave, that wasnât â Iâm so glad youâre alright, believe me, I am, but every time I see you, or see Mikey, I just get so mad that all I want to do is go track down Shredder and make him pay for what he did to you, for what he made you do.â
And despite how wrong Leo is about everything â nothing about this is his fault â Raph canât help but feel reassured by the normalcy of it. As sad and messed up as it might be, things donât seem quite right if Leoâs not beating himself up about something.
âI hear you on that last part,â Raph replies as Leo pulls away, âbut bro, this isnât your fault â youâve never made me do anything I didnât want to do before, and you arenât starting now.â
Leo laughs, rubbing the back of his head. âYeah, I guess not. Iâm just glad youâre okay â both of you,â he adds, looking over at Mikey. âHe is okay, right, Donnie?â
âHe is, but he wonât be after Iâm through with him,â Donnie replies, reaching for the crutch lying on the ground at Mikeyâs feet. âWhat were you thinking, Mikey, I told you weâd find Raph â youâre supposed to be at home! Howâd you even get up here?â
Raph blinks. âThatâs a good question â how did you get up here, Mikey?â
Mikey rolls his good eye theatrically, pointing at himself. âUh, hel-lo. Ninja. Duh.â
Donnie snorts as the others laugh. âOh, by the way,â he says suddenly, pulling out something that was tucked into his belt, âyou forgot this, Raph.â
And there, fluttering in the evening breeze, is Raphâs mask. Raph feels the knot in his chest â there since he first saw Mikey lying comatose in bed, now even larger after leaving the lair â loosen as he takes the fabric from his brotherâs hand and ties it around his face, his fingers forming the knot with practiced ease.
When he looks up again, the sunset has largely faded, but his brothers are there, smiling at him, and itâs like a piece of him that was knocked out of alignment has fallen back into place, and for the first time in weeks, he thinks he might sleep well tonight.
âCome on, guys,â he says, smiling back at them. âLetâs go home.â
I canât get over how Shredder decked him out in mini Shredder-gauntlets. Like, âhell yeah, stolen Hamato child number 2. This time nothing is going to go wrong, he will be obedient and awesome and I shall call him Shredder Juniorâ
Shaddup Saki. You know what? I canât believe Iâm saying this, but follow in the footsteps of your 2k3 counterpart and try ADOPTING ACTUAL ORPHANS YOU HELMET-BETROTHED DRAMATIC DICKBUTT.