#danniele

Tonight, Danniele and I were talking about how living in this in-between period where we're too old to be carefree and build pillow forts and play barefoot but also too young to own a house complete with our own cookware and libraries and animals is just bullshit. We decided there wasn't really anything good about this in-between. I've been thinking about our decision since then. As much as I'd like to think that I'm ready for my own house and maybe a husband and all of the responsibilities that come along with those things, I'm not. Those things still scare the shit out of me. Maybe that will never change, but I like to think that at some point I will be better equipped to handle the challenges that come with such adult responsibilities. I've always thought of myself as mature for my age and now I'd just like to be my age. To find some way to enjoy this in-between, because I know I need to. I have an amazing best friend, and a wonderful boyfriend, and some awesome jobs, and I'm heading toward the career I want. I've taken on too much debt for school and I'm not even done yet, and I hate living with my family sometimes, and I hate feeling so stagnant in this small little town. But in all reality, I love this small little town, and the people in it (for the most part), and while the future may be nice to live in sometimes, I have a pretty damn good in-between going on and I should probably take advantage of that while I can. So here's to the in-between: it may be bullshit, but let's make it fun.

Literally the only two sentences I've connected with tonight have been "If I feel like there’s a chance of losing someone, I’ll always try to be the one that backs out first" and "I suck at all the things." Clearly an emotionally healthy night.