I couldn’t sleep last night and I think it’s because today is such a monumentally big day for me and it’s not quite hitting me yet. yesterday i hung out with all my classmates, all of us together in the same room for what I’m sure is the last time and I just remember feeling very small and very quiet. a few of us were sipping spiked drinks out of clear plastic bottles on the back of the bus and giving each other shit the entire drive to the fancy ass restaurant we were eating at for free that day. Culinary school has taught me a lot, and not just how to cook. it taught me how to pick up slack for other people and also when to cut people a break, and even not to always judge someone based on your first impression of them. people change, for fucks sake, I know i’m not the same person I was two years ago when I entered the program with no friends. now I have people I would gladly die for, who I have sweated, and chopped and busted my butt next too and it just reminds me why having a meal together with someone is something so special. anyway, I was sitting in the back of the bus, looking out over all of my classmates and thinking, what an extraordinarily beautiful group of people. all of them with their different personalities and strengths and weaknesses and set of skills. It broke my heart a little bit, it still is. In less than 10 hours, I am going to be a college graduate. and in less than one hour, I am going to be picking up the keys to my new apartment. since when did being an adult get so surreal?
